Humorous Limerick Poems

He was virile voyager called Stanley,
with slurping tongue he could burn cold alley.
         In journey from top...

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This old madam bought a big Christmas tree,
size could be problem she did not foresee.
         Low level...

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A racecar Claire wanted to drive.
Oh, madam if you want to survive
refer to these notes;
she sees it’s for boats.
It’s a kayak you need, sakes alive!...

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A lubricious lady from Kent
one night to a nightclub she went;
there, she spied a young guy
thought she'd give it a try;
turned out, given that up...

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Watch out for a girl named Brandy.
She goes around stealing candy.
Even worse, she will try
to steal a girl’s guy,
for Brandy also is randy.

She’s sure an...

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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
There once was a cowboy from Texas,
Whose life was a whirlwind of nexus.
He rode through the plains,
In sunshine and rains,
Inside his comfortable Lexus.
...

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How about some delicious tea
I want it with crackers and brie
Honey is very sweet
Better than sweaty feet
I got bit by a yellow bee



That bee just...

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~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
‘Madam! rhymes I defy,
for they displease my eye.
With ‘wow’ I wildly converse 
‘I’m Ava,’ I write free verse
in words alas drown I

My muse I deified;
she’s...

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A shepherdess, I’ll call her Heather
Loved coitus when dressed in black leather
High up in the hills
She’s getting her thrills
And getting wet in the wild weather

The...

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Poor Fido is last in the queue
For cocking his leg on the yew
He hopes the other dogs
Don’t produce poopy logs
He’s bursting to pee and then...

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All the neighborhood dogs I can see,
have now lined up at MY back yard tree.
What a nerve they’ve all got
to be marking that spot.
Dogs-be-gone! That...

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Come on guys I really need to go.
My inside are about to blow,
This line is way too long,
No time to sing a song.
I am filled...

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Bonded by basic needs, so to speak,
Canine cliques congregate for a leak; 
Not hard to foresee -
Neighbour’s only tree -
Scoop by scoop will turn into...

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 The Man
Miracle Man
4/19/2024

An old geezer who had a thin truncal,
was cursed with a large neck carbuncle,
He wasn’t the same,
after bad news came,
of cannibals making...

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I can't really write a sonnet
But if you want a limerick i'm on it
And if I had to write without rhymezone
My mind would have blown
Therefore...

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