Lecherous Poems | Examples

Scantilly Clad Women

I don't have a problem with scantily clad ladies
They all have a right to expose their parts
Especially if those parts are firm and voluptuous
Who am I to complain
The Caribbean is overflowing with these latin beauties
Had to look away... my old heart was a-pumping
A mile a minute and my eyes started bugging out
“Dangerous”, they say... “watch your heart!”
Don't these young fillies realize what they're doing to us old guys
Of course they do! And they love it!
Do I sound like a lecherous old dude
So what's so wrong with being a lecherous old dude
Some of my best friends fit that description to a “T”
Women's bodies are a work of art
And are designed to be ogled at
It's written on one of those ancient Egyptian tablets
So next time one walks by
Offer your thanks and quietly wipe the drool from your chin
Scantily clad ladies... YEE HAW!

Prurient Manuscript

Suck and lick my delicious fiction,
I’m lecherous taste the distinction;
A story you’ve wanted to be real,
now before the writer you will kneel;

The chapter filled with hanky-panky
describing a skimpy lace panty?
I know that vision is honey dipped,
it’s such a prurient manuscript;

Keep my fantasy by your bedside,
wanton desire you simply can’t hide;

On every page my hunger has dripped
not a single detail has been skipped;
Let your eyes devour lines greedily
I’m giving voyeurs a glimpse of me;

A scene readers are welcome to steal,
I know you long to feel what I feel;
Baby, help me write the description,
suck and lick my delicious fiction.

Lecherous Lever

You pulled a lecherous lever,
hid behind the word forever;
Told me to never say never;
Misbehavior, misbehavior;

You did not expect me to win 
but I knew just how to begin;
Enamor you as the lynchpin,
gotta check-in, gotta check-in.

when the sun again do rise

O when the sun again do rise, 
    ‘nd you with emerald eyes,
think not, of me, in ways kind; nah!!! 
greet me as in throes; heeded greed perch’d  
    awin’ lecherous pine,  
dip me amid rude imaginings, vile; yet fine. 
think me ogre vying funsy peachy hind, or pig, 
  scoundrel even, lathering sweet pinkish chime. 

O when the sun again do rise, 
    ‘nd the sky had yet to surmise,  
before the clock boom a cry, not in vague lye 
nor spurn form’d pulsating stalk.  
   not in wholesome gown be robed; jazz-up racy talk.   

if ne’er, do, when heat fills the bust,  
    unfettered lust dine, thus,  
does truth of  bliss cum, midst the two of us?   

O when the sun again do rise,  
   ‘nd you with emerald eyes, oh let’s not do find 
exhaustion’s unclothed musk odd to us.

Scaring Little Old Ladies

Don't know if I've ever told you before
But I'm the creative director
Of our cool little community newspaper
It's quite the people connector

It's all about events and the 'goings on'
That interest the local folks
But I'm not averse to lighting things up
With an abundance of silly jokes

Keeps me out of damn mischief each day
Instead of walking the streets
Scaring the little old ladies half to death
Offering them goodies and sweets

Guess I sound like a lecherous old man
But I do get lonely at times
That's when wifey chains me to the porch
But I'm a sweet old loveable kind!

So it's finally out, now you guys can see
When not concocting silly rhymes
Try hard  to find ways to amuse myself
Till wifey calls me in at nine!

The Meanness of Some Frogs

She had to stretch on tiptoes to kiss Prince Frog
He stood still, but his polka dots were quivering
He liked attention from sweet young girls

She thought it was an innocent kiss, and so did we
Not knowing at the time about the mean ways of some frogs
lecherous frogs with sad malicious selfish nasty ways

In some ways I wish we never had to warn our children
About these frogs, and I am conflicted
Is it better if they do not know

Or better if they know to run……

The Bliss of Daylight

A smile of vitamin D will bleed,
surrender now trade it for the night;
The warmth of the colors at twilight,
let your lecherous desires feed; 

Moonlight will capture your soul 
let go of decomposition for immortality;
Through a hunter’s eyes you will see
covered in stardust you become whole;

From the moment you receive the kiss
young fangs become your epicenter;
In the frenzy of your birth as a vampire 
you won’t remember daylight’s bliss.

Hazmat

Unbeknownst to them I am their wild child,
what a precious smile she’s a pussycat;
Lecherous phrases on iron they were filed,
unbeknownst to them I am their wild child;
Calculated and curt is how I’m styled,
silk hat graffitied with the word ‘Hazmat’.
Unbeknownst to them I am their wild child,
what a precious smile she’s a pussycat.

Rehashing History: Some Bare Facts About Lady Godiva

Lady Godiva wasn't trying to be cute
When she went for that ride in her birthday suit.
It was her husband's taxes she protested,
All butt naked and bare-breasted,
She only did as he'd suggested, so any argument was moot.

The townsfolk of Coventry were warned not to peek,
And no lecherous looks at the lady to seek.
But one sneak did succumb,
Later called "Peeping Tom",
And was struck blind and dumb 'cause his morals were weak.

When Lady G. returned home, she re-braided her tresses,
Re-robed and prepared for her hubby's redresses.
But he didn't rebuke her for going out starkers
Or for publicly displaying bush, bum, and knockers,
And, though truly chagrined, he rescinded his taxation excesses.

What a Lecher Does

She was twenty-two-years old
childlike, but not childish
her mind was not as deep thinking as many
but she was empathetic and kind
goodness oozed out of her
she was the victim of a lecherous relative
he knew she was going to expose him
he talked her mother into giving her a lobotomy
she was institutionalized the rest of her life
barely able to speak or move
her father safely moved on to other young victims

Pat Benatar Did Children a Favor

Hell is for children was a brave song, introduced exactly right.
Pat Benatar wrote it and sang it, and gave it some might.
We tried to hide from it, to keep memories out of sight.
But we all know that children’s lives are often a blight. 

Children are told to lie, not to tell grandma or teach.
They are bribed and blackmailed, along with some preach.
About how they will hurt the family, and it is all their fault.
We have to protect Mommy’s special friend, lecherous old Walt.

Hell is for children is being lived to this very day.
By innocent children who live next door, and far away.
They have bruises, welt marks and broken bones too.
I think Benatar did us a favor bringing this to light. Don’t you?

Give Me Some Dancing Shoes

Give me some dancing shoes
Move out of my jazzy red suede blues
Let me whirl my bipolar absolute truth
Who is that? Is that dead husband of Ruth?

Give me my high heels, silver, sassy and large
I’ll take a burger with fries; make it a charge.
If I step on your toes, be sure to squeal.
That way I will know that you are delightfully real.

Give me some space. Bring me my fur coat.
Give me whirling room, you old lecherous goat!
I need to howl and I need to swing.
This life could really bring me some absolute zing.

Giving me love will just break your unhappy heart.
What else to say? Where could this old heartbreaker start?
Stay out of my way, you cannot control or cage me.
I’m dancing my truth, single with jazz, here I’ll be.

Give Me Some Space

Give me some dancing shoes
Move out of my jazzy red suede blues
Let me whirl my bipolar absolute truth
Who is that? Is that dead husband of Ruth?

Give me my high heels, silver, sassy and large
I’ll take a burger with fries; make it a charge.
If I step on your toes, be sure to squeal.
That way I will know that you are delightfully real.

Give me some space. Bring me my fur coat.
Give me whirling room, you old lecherous goat!
I need to howl and I need to swing.
This life could really bring me some absolute zing.

Giving me love will just break your unhappy heart.
What else to say? Where could this old heartbreaker start?
Stay out of my way, you cannot control or cage me.
I’m dancing my truth, single with jazz, here I’ll be.

The Amorous Rover

THE AMOROUS ROVER

An amorous dog, name of Rover,
Tried to win a lady dog over.
She agreed to a date
And although she was late,
Our Rover was truly in clover.

They had best caviar and champagne
And duck a’lorange for their main.
When it came to the sweet,
They conceded defeat
And decided it best to abstain

She said, “I am watching my figure.
I don’t want to get any bigger.”
And to make sure she knew,
“I am watching it too,”
He said with a lecherous s.

He wanted to make her his soul mate
And thought he would move at a fast rate.
He said, “Your place or mine?”
She said, “That’s out of line,
I never succumb on the first date.

That was two months ago back in May
And he got his way, needless to say.
And as for her figure
It got rather bigger.
They expect their litter next Friday 

7th March 2022
Tall Tales 1 poetry contest
Sponsor - Jeff Kyser
HowManySyllables.com

A To Z of Partying - Ap

At Blitzen’s Christmas Dances Everyone Fields Glances
However, It Just Keeps Lecherous Men’s Nuances
Out Pacing Quietly Reserved Shy Things
Until Vodka Wields Xmas Yuletide Zings 



6 November 2021
For Contest: Alphabet Soup
Sponsor: William Kekaula

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