Great T-rumposaurus meanus!
Adolph and Don share a genus
With teensy wiener
Was Hitler meaner
Or Trump with his weeny p-e-n-i-s?
Identical twins Marian and Vivian are sisters with flair
You might see them out in the San Francisco air
They are famous for their identical outfits for sure
Filling gawking children full of delightful wonder
when I research I sometimes stumble upon
interesting facts that intrigue me, that delight me
children of identical twins, their babies, their spawn
are genetically half-siblings;, this is how it can be….
their parent derived from one single DNA egg
that split into two people, fresh break, all frayed
intriguing if you are indeed an identical twin
which I am, so this fact was definitely a great big win
When finding your identical twin,
There’s always trial and error.
But I’ve taken a shortcut:
By looking into the mirror!
There go the Brown twins, the Brown twins.
Hey, Brown twin, want a ride?
Hey, Brown twin, how does it feel to see double?
He, Brown twin, do you chew Double Mint gum?
At first as a twin, you are a novelty.
You either like the attention or despise it.
I loved it in kindergarten but despised it in first grade.
In kindergarten we were smaller and got carried around by classmates.
Are you identical twins? The school teacher asked.
I am not impressed, slightly stuplified and aghast.
They are boy and girl twins, you idiot I want to say.
But I have used up all of my insult quota until next Wednesday.
Identical twins, they have a crisis
Look-alikes, neither is known for niceness,
Terry writes his poems
While his brother ho-hums,
And neither one has joined up with Isis.
An h/t Terry Flood's "Identity Crisis"
Written November 26, 2022
[Terry is one of the most humorous
writers on Poetry Soup.]
twins
labelled
misleading
identical
different ideas
diverse ideals
yes they live in the same house
they do not have the same sister
a liberal and a Republican
no two people are exactly alike
Being an identical twin means you do not have a name
For the first eighteen years of your life but keep your happy heart.
You are called “Hey, you, Twin!” or “Stone Twin!”
Except by your friends who are amazing and can tell you apart.
I could not wait to leave home, so I could wear my own stuff.
My identical twin wanted to dress identically, this was so tough.
I could not wait to get out the door and be called my own name.
I did not tell anyone I had a look-alike, who looked exactly the same.
Now we are older, and we get a kick out of dressing alike.
It takes us hours of deciding, because we can rarely agree.
I like clothes with words, a motto, or moral, or a monster on a hike.
My twin likes to wear florals, old people clothes that irritate me.
We have a twin laugh that is creepy. Our whole family rolls their eyes.
This laugh starts out loud but after a while turns silent, which is cool.
Silent laugh, our children say, not understanding or able to surmise.
That twins have a sense of humor that follows no sense or rule.
When you have a thin identical twin
And you are the heavy one,
on your way to the largest weight number of your life,
it makes you want to eat.
I am an emotional eater;
thus I stay away from my twin
Who has my face, and my mannerisms
but is fifty pounds heavier.
I am a lifetime member of Weight Watchers.
I lost sixty-four pounds once and kept them off
For two or three years.
Then one day I knew I wanted my chocolate.
And my sugar, and my peanut butter.
That was sixty-seven pounds ago.
I was exercising like mad during my two year healthy regime.
Not so much anymore. I sit in a chair now.
I ate six tins of cookies over Christmas break.
My dogs love me fat and sassy. I sit and think about food.
I am the mashed potato queen.
I dare not tell you how many of these I have eaten lately.
I know I am not healthy. But I am not ready to give up
My sugar, my potatoes, my beef and noodles, my breads,
My emotional eating is at an all-time high.
I know what I have to do. I am not there yet.
What you deem frivolous
Is often of utmost importance to me.
Difficult to believe
We were raised by the same parents.
I answer to all names.
Lee, Charming, Hey You, Auntie Squeak Cake
I am not particular now
having finally gotten over the identical twin thing
where I did not have a name for the first eighteen years of my life
Identical twins have a mystical language no one else knows.
They can catch each other’s eyes and laugh forever.
One is dependent, wants to dress alike until they are a hundred.
Her twin is the boss, and does not want to dress alike at all.
They send and receive indecipherable silent messages.
Sharing a womb and a family has bonded them forever.
In kindergarten we were the little dollies
Carried around by our classmates all day
Until we started to like it
My happy twin and I
Naturally prissy teacher tried to stop it
But they loved us ever much our classmates
We were popular that first week of school
Everyone wanted to play with the twins
Many had never seen the like
We were identical
I remember my curly head swelled up a bit
We both thought we were the best in the class
Our mother tried to take us down a peg or two
But Daddy thought it was hilarious
I still remember this fondly
I loved kindergarten!
The year we got carried around and loved a lot!
The best year of my life in many ways.
Never had a horse and rider had a more intense bond
They communed with feelings others could not touch
It was no mistake their hair and attitude were identical
Meant to be together in this lifetime and possibly the next
They had a bond humans can only dream of
A natural chemistry that exuded trust and love
They were a sight as they traipsed through the snow
One in every way; telepathy oozing out of them
Related Poems