I'm waiting at the corner bar,
And sucking down an ice cold brew!
My buddy was setting me up,
With a girlfriend with eyes bright blue!
I'm nervous and apprehensive,
I saw them coming through the door!
Well, she looked just like an angel,
That's when my blood began to roar!
After casual introductions,
My friend unfortified my dread.
But, after he finished speaking,
I was mortified blind instead!
Well, what he actually said was...
She's got cherries on her chest, a tattoo!
But, what I think I thought he said was...
She's got a hairier chest than you!
Then the room just began to spin,
And my brain sputtered and addled!
I snatched up my wallet and keys,
Then I just up and skedaddled!
Made a lot of mistakes in my time,
Some things in life, you'll always regret!
I'm sure gonna miss my best friend,
Cuz, I still haven't heard from him yet!
The cynical witches watched the night air
In slid a broom without fuss or any fanfare
On her stick was a small witch, her name was Claire
She was the queen of the witches, and she gave a stare
She is so young! Hagmouth said, I thought she would be scarier.
I heard she was ape-like said another. I thought she would be hairier.
I did not know what to expect said a witch who was usually merrier.
Claire flipped her broom and flew straight into their barrier.
What sort of homeless person would I be
Would I cart all these books everywhere with me
Would I scream and shout to keep the world at bay
Or would I nod and smile by my tin cup each day
Would I dress real well, try to look like a swell
Or would I let myself go, not put on a show
Would I turn to drugs or would I stick with booze
What would I have to lose
Would I rant and rave about equality
And how you look right through me
Or would I understand -
you need to keep what you’ve got
You don’t want to land in this spot
Would I have any hope, would there be any rope
Gone are the jobs that kept the unlucky on track
Now the squirrels are on crack, the humans on smack
The armpit of L.A. gets hairier by the day
they say
that over
there is different
from what is here so
the
grass
grows
greener
on
the
other
side so
says
a bible
stopping
and thinking
yes
actually
think about
this and what
it
means
not seeing
the other side
as greener but more
perhaps
you would
say obscener
but what i mean
to say
is hairier
then what
was before
A competition was held in Bulgaria
to find out which girl's legs were hairier.
The winning lassie
beat a huge chimpanzee
and a wiry old Irish Fox Terrier.
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