Best Whooped Poems

Miss Muffet sat upon a velvet stool
I know 'twas a tuffet; learned that in school
But Muffy was the tart
Who broke the spider's heart
I'm telling the story, so shut up, fool!

Humpty Dumpty had no wisdom at all
That stupid raw egg sat upon a wall
Tempting luck, he...

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I was dancing and prancing 
And singing whooped Dee Dee
Not realizing I was not alone
Until he opened his shirt to me

He threw out the mayo, some jam and some jelly, a real hoot.
I caught the chocolate milk in midair, he was dancing up a toot.
He...

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Absurd situations amuse me; they get written into poems.
Foolish generalizations about groups of people infuriate me; 
they also get written into poems.
All Irish, all whites, all English, all red-heads, there is no all.  
It makes not a whit of sense.

But the one thing that...

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She pumped the air and whooped,
'The holidays are through!'
She danced a jig, she spun,
and did a moonie too.
The grinning mother yelled,
'They're back to school again!'
But then her laughter died,
she groaned in awful pain
and mopped her furrowed brow,
for she's a teacher now...

written 20th August for Francine's...

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Heavy heart 

Die  die
The fear in my eye
I can hide behind this badge
It will protect me and mines 

Is this how you feds think
Is this how you feds feel
You fear the color of my skin so using your badge makes you real.......

Real tough? 
Real...

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We got a bubble machine and rigged it up a bit.
To the cow water trough, it was a really tight fit.
Come on! I urged Bubba, grandma’s nap won’t last.
I knew if she caught us, we’d be whooped hard and fast.

We were giggling so hard, probably...

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Karl Marx was a historian and scholar
  Groucho Marx whooped it up and hollered

    Both of them were starved for attention
    Neither of them honorable menschen *  



  ____________________________________
  * 'Menschen' in Yiddish literally means...

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We are young
Love to sing the red maple’s sorrow
Love to ask why people are so busy
Love teasing merchants as they crazily whooped 
Sometimes we see sparrow’s head overturned
We will laugh all day long

Life is dancing with the cloud and moon
Poetry is the vintage
Drunk together with...

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As dad and I trod over the newly tilled fields
Feeling warmed by the prospect of the day’s work
His eyes aglow within those granite features
I followed his sight to that field beyond as yet unsown

He called it virgin soil or heavens harrowed field
So long ago as...

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I believed those cartoons when Popeye whooped Bluto.
If you're wondering if it was real, the answer is hell no.
When I watched those cartoons, I was dumb because I believed them fully.
I decided to eat a can of spinach and then face the neighborhood bully.
I believed...

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Wacky Willie whittled while whistling weirdly
Widow Winnie winced at Willie's wacky whistling-
And wrecked Willie's weird wooden whittled whistle.......


Woefull winded grandchildren whooped with delight...
If you havent guessed..lol ...for the Tongue Twister contest......

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For eons, as a spirit on this earth
I’ve dwelt; I still recall the autumn‘s cold
when I was human on this new year’s birth,
that “hallowed eve” when spirits would grow bold!

Our homes were unlit and uninviting
lest spirits might possess our souls that night.
We’d gather round the...

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Influenced by "Sir Gawain and the Green Knight" and "The Rape of the Lock," my goal is to write this completely in iambic meter with (mostly?) rhyming couplets. (Though the intro's meter varies, the main parts will all be fourteeners). Entirety is a W.i.P.
_

Presentiment

La femme...

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—The sense of sound—

He was curious, he opened the door,
he heard a scream, then he yelped.

He suddenly banged the door,
someone cawed from behind the door,

it changed to crackle crackle,
then became an incessant echo.

He again opened the door and heard,
the roomful echo changed to murmuring stream,

then...

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Screamin’ Bill Wilcox was quite a man,
Carved from a block of stone
With a face of leather, deeply tanned
And a voice you could hear in Rome.

A cow hand he was, best with a rop
Could ride both bull or stead,
Quick with a joke, quick with a laugh
Quicker...

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