Best Take Umbrage Poems

Sportin' a wrap on one foot
A hard grimace set on his jaw
A Beagle walked in, holdin a grudge
Because somebody shot his paw!

He growled, "Pour me a rain water,"
"And none of that chlorine laced crap"
The Bar dog, a well known poodle,
Said, "Sir, I take umbrage at...

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I've heard about the arrival of fanciful fushia strangers
but I've no fear of them and not worried about dangers.
They seem a bit nonsensical; funny the way they speak
To me, everything they say comes out sounding like Greek!

Maybe on their planet, peaches have three turquoise eyes
Could...

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Limerick: Once Japanese Robot lied about its age

Once Japanese Robot lied about its age
To an American Robot under age
	At marriage registry
	Paid haemophrodite fee
That night in shed they locked jaws in mad glad rage.

One said: “If only I knew your true old age
I would not have...

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Ever so peaceful you appear,
Disguising your eternal suffrage.
Silent is your noted fear;
For to humans, you take umbrage.

Yet you try to smile, 
As the crimson stains your body.
You chant “Peace!” in denial,
To your own folly.

Bear witness to carnage;
Bear witness to despair.
For you are the stage,
In which...

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In winters softness
          each flake of snow seeks refuge-
               ill winds take umbrage...

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Am I the only One who sees the need elsewhere,
Who objects to TV's in the takeaway shop here,
The hospital waiting room over there,
And one in the adjoining corridor, just to be sure.
Huge ones at too many sports venues in case we missed the four.

They don't...

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16/04/2018

Through my bloodstream pulsing,
Insidious poison runs rampant.
I open veins willingly for more,
And the hidden addict slams the door.

The insurgents are loose and swelling,
The castle has been breached.
The moat of my memory recedes,
As the hidden addicts force proceeds.

Violently flowing unchecked they swarm,
The gates of my deluded...

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Not so long ago your heart was irreparably broken
You didn’t want to hear his name spoken
Your misery was so all-consuming -
And you were full of dooming and glooming -
That the threat of self-harm was bandied about
Just for attention, of that I have no doubt.
Yet here...

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generally not worth a cent                                     
   citizen...

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eclipse an errant eon
inhale discordant ions
exhale insectile icons

disarm misfiring memes
take umbrage under a titanic umbrella
recede from seething red-holes in sinkholes

just so you know…
Helga and Zohar orbit the Moon
a harsh mistress giggles indifferently
a cold cosmos says nothing
you are (not) what you think (you are)

forbid fallacious words
forget...

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generally not worth a cent                                     
   citizen...

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1.
“Communion of saints, forgiveness of sins,”
Worship words recited, relationships
Reflected among restless, inconstant,
Imperfect people, somehow sharing a
Faith which makes them one. I appropriate
These sacred words to speak in hallowed
Terms to the bond which unites our two hearts,
Holy Union, Wholly Uniting Us!
COMMUNION – Like a song without...

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COPLA 67 INVOCATION: This Bad Guy World

“That’s the spirit, Tell the Old Man off!
Who does He think we are, s’il vous plait!
Of course, you’re right.”

If there were a God anthropomorph
Yes, we could all take umbrage and pray:
Universe might

Might we not be an experiment
Of some advanced...

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Football is a grand old sport
  So much fun to play
It's easy to escape injury
  If your opponent you outweigh

My favorite part's those bone-crushing hits
  That make your head and ears just ring
You'll heal up in 'concussion protocol'
  With a few...

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Portraits can take many shapes and forms
Unlike in Rembrandt, a Rubens, or even a Dali
Modern artists will often eschew the norms
Portraits of myself do not look much like me.

Unlike in Rembrandt, a Rubens, or even a Dali
A portrait may be merely a fine-line drawing
Portraits of...

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