Best Spayed Poems
Initially, Lady adopted just the gray One for love and fun.
A pal gifted another, a kitten who needed a Mother.
Though spayed, One let Two nurse and her milk did disburse,
said a Vet whose face crunched, bemused and confused.
For One and Two days passed with Lady’s love steadfast.
Cat Three showed in winter’s cold, wanting warmth’s hold.
At first, Three was snubbed by grown One and growing Two.
Eventually their curiosity was peaked by things Three did do,
strange things Cat One and Cat Two could not reason thru.
Three stole garments from the basket of Lady’s dirty clothes,
dragged them into corner places that she carefully chose,
and then she, Cat Three, exposed all to odd licking throes.
Appalled, One and Two would withdraw and prissily pose,
until pride turned trite when Lady raced a laser, red light.
Four showed one Spring day, when Lady saw a gray tail sway
belonging to a striped, cat-baby who had no home or safety.
Lady immediately, eagerly, telephoned her brother, Clark,
and asked if Four would officially make her a Crazy Cat Lady.
He spoke, but she could not quite hear the words from Clark,
not over his ten dogs harmonizing a united, piercing bark.
Categories:
spayed, animal, cat, crazy,
Form:
Rhyme
Finally you asked for dog’s point of view -
The dialogue of depth, long overdue.
Without a word I’m whistling in the dark,
Articulation’s muffled by the bark.
Seems all I need is to frolic and play,
It’s true, but man! I have a lot to say!
Firstly, thank you for making my dog’s life
Domesticated bliss versus tramp’s strife.
Grateful I am, loved, trimmed, walked, bathed and fed,
Well-groomed and I would like to think, well-bred.
Anatomy and science, not my strength,
Honored that pampering goes to great length;
I must be one exquisite species group,
Since my poop is collected in a scoop.
But I often question, why am I spayed?
While my master so frequently gets laid!
If deemed as your best friend, a well-known claim,
Isn’t making me beg for treats a shame?
Sit down, shake your paw, play dead, dance and prance –
Shallow, degrading, ludicrous commands.
For you I’d sacrifice my life, my friend,
I’d snarl, chase, leap and tackle to no end.
I pretty much follow one petsy rule -
You got the bone, thus over you I drool.
But, master, while I’m fetching your thrown sticks,
Don’t waste your time teaching old dog new tricks.
Be aware I’m an easy pet to crack!
If you love me, I’ll always love you back!
June 6, 2022
Categories:
spayed, animal, dog, pets,
Form:
Personification
Now if I shoot at you with live ammo that's personal,
Words just don't hack it, most thoughts too bizarre
To attribute to anything short of dementia,
With colors that dribble, fake tears! Spayed guitar!
Sounds so high strung with guts, from such different cats,
Tones all bounce off life’s rails more like temper’s distemper.
What cue ball can't sink are your colors to choose,
But consider largesse to be caveat emptor.
The precision you see here's designed to confuse you,
For order is something most men can't abide,
But the devil take foremost, ‘who’s first,’ most deserving
A cinch that there's nothing to trump – more than pride!
Long Tooth
June 2nd in 2019
Categories:
spayed, emotions, humor, irony, life,
Form:
Rhyme
Lucky left on Thursday
a stroke
Friday no tip tap in hallway
Saturday no tip tap in hallway
Sunday morning, we woke to tip tap in hallway
"Did you hear that?"
Jumped out of bed.
New dog had come into the doggy door.
Not Lucky, but another black dog,
needing a home.
It's too soon, my husband said.
He took her to the vet for her shots on Monday.
Was raving about her on Tuesday.
Fed her chicken, beef, eggs, all the good stuff.
Gave her chocolate which everyone knows not to do.
New dog, Sophie, stayed at the vet overnight to get spayed.
I woke up at 2 a.m. to Lucky's familiar tip tap in hallway.
Jumped out of bed and ran to look.
I believe she was letting us know that she is
Sophie's spirit dog.
Categories:
spayed, angel, dog, pets, spiritual,
Form:
Free verse
I've had many pets in my life.
Right now two cats and I abide
In my small house the size for us,
But I can't let this pair outside.
They're feral cats that I rescued
When wild coyotes invaded nests.
Wild coyotes on our rich farm land
Have become real cat-nab pests.
A neutered tom and spayed kitty
Have the full range of my loved home.
Their antics keep me entertained
And none of us now care to roam.
They run and play amicably
And gladly share their lives me.
11/16/2014
Categories:
spayed, animal,
Form:
Sonnet
Crofts of humble
mute to grumble
What prods a heart to seek succor?
Fall to tumble
mind a’jumble
spayed fingers join to clasp in prayer.
Flipped to sober
fearless warrior
What tools to fight off plights of fear?
High to lower
wise the warrior
Gains strength and force in quiet’s calm.
Thank you Karen O'Leary...I'll send you
a picture of 'Flip', when I can get back into
Illustrator.:) You're a gentle and kind lady,
and very inspirational!!
Categories:
spayed, introspection,
Form:
Verse
We are sisters we are cousins
We are friends who have no limits
We don’t know color race or creed
We live in harmony
We have boundaries we use respect
But we don’t wear blue suede shoes
You draw the line and tow it well
We often cross each others
Proudly bitches save the heat
Heart of tigress take the meat
Mostly brave some afraid
One in hate another spayed
As sex would have it we are non
You know what they do to us
Awake at four to check the door
At five we’re still alive
Is sex the same as gender
We have neither we don’t care
Is race the same as color
We have both we still share
If that is yours and mine is none
Can we not still shout it loud
Can we walk on one fine earth as friends
Can we shine and still be proud
Of feline femininity
Affectionate but fair
Of credence to no solemn cause
Nor fear of fleeting dare
Of canine fierce audacity
Much faithful to a friend
On guard with all tenacity
What treasure to defend
Slaven to no other
Libertarian are we
We have masters but they love us
They will always keep us free
Our other cousin she’s a gem, she doesn’t live around here
But if and when she comes to town, we’ll put flowers in our hair
Enjoy the music here.
http://mike-martin.net/The Girls
Chords per verse
1 5 4 5
4 5 1 5
1 5 4 5
4 5 1 5
Such as ..
D A G A
G A D A
D A G A
G A D A
Categories:
spayed, gender, philosophy, pride, princess,
Form:
Personification
This is just an update to those of you who love your pets!!
Not all the doctors are cruel hearted, greedy vets!!
I actually talked to a nice Doctor last night,
and at five o'clock my cat gave birth to five babies.
The lady took me at my word that I'll pay her tomorrow!
Four babies lived and my cat is now spayed and her babies lived.
All but, one. I actually helped revive the kittens with my sister.
This lady was so upset that she couldn't do anything at the clinic
she was "on call" for, that when she got home to her house she called.
She has her own practice at her house, and she feared my baby would die.
As did, I. So My cat, Maxine, who is named after my Grandma, is okay.
So is Lois and Quagmire, (Family Guy), and Emmet and Jasper. (Twilight)
So thanks everybody!!!! You guys are the greatest!!!!!
Categories:
spayed, animals, devotion, faith, hope,
Form:
Narrative
Across the tossing tumult of reality
my brain gasps for truth, for freedom.
This inconvenient leprosy of mind,
whose scarred visage must be quelled.
My own reflection has no scars,
yet, all about are those that insist that ...
AH! What a perfect sunrise!
no soylent concoction, no peering prying eyes
-hidden yawns or dulcet tones or pseudo smiles,
suggesting - DEMANDING I ...no, this day
I will go to where only God knows where I am.
I will dance with the forgotten frantic weeds
- spayed and sprayed, dandelions of disdain
live here unfettered
This house, neglected, forgotten in
a field of imperfection to those
who can not see what is perfect, is Heaven to me!
Apples with scarred blemished skins
beg to be loved - excused for
their imperfections shall
be my nourishment.
The passing of each day -
my romantic vision transformed,
my own pace, my own space, where
freedom hugs me, warms me, feeds me
and loves me
-sleep dear child, you are free.
I am found, but then, God always knew
...where I was.
(True story, please google "god knows where I am" - it will haunt you)
Categories:
spayed, life,
Form:
Free verse
There lives a puppy named Weasel
She's almost big as a diesel
Artists paint her on their easel
She can be found digging up bones
Her heart is as wild as a deer
She's amazing - she's without fear
Her hair grows in spite of the shear
She eats so she may get gallstones
Her mind is stirred up by the cats
At night, she'll chase after the bats
I once caught her chasing the rats
She is spayed but still has hormones
Her time is spent near the river
Sometimes, she eats things like liver
Her soul is kind - she's a giver
On the web, she uses our phones
Her joy is found in hues of pink
She'll pick that one without a blink
If you pet her, she'll give a stink
Living with her gives me love tones
Her light falls soft on any heart
She's lovable, warm and so smart
Yet, she may smile, look up and fart
When she visits vets she gets cones
Her life has been one filled with hope
Mind, soul and spirit, she can cope
She is happy - won't ever mope
I promise, my heart, Weasel owns
Tall Tales 2 Poetry Contest
Sponsored by: Jeff Kyser
April 6, 2022
Categories:
spayed, animal, cat, cute, dog,
Form:
Tail-rhyme
MEEEEOOOWWWW HAIKU
Pussy cat in heat
tom cat prowling down the street
is your kitty spayed?
© Ron Wilson aka Vee Bdosa the Doylestown poet
Categories:
spayed, animal, cat, romantic,
Form:
Haiku
Sirens sounded secretly securing source. Strait sacks swooshed scamps scaling sensitive sentries (simply spayed seals) surveying surrounding staked spy sotted sham semicircular slipshod shelter. Snappy, Snippy, Snoopy suited Skyhawks surprisingly swooped somnambulant senseless scriveners. Sargent Salemander slipped shiny shimmering shellacked Sheppards Shutterfly sidearms sized simulated small skyscraper slinky, soapy, spooky squarely summoned, sentenced, sacrificed see swarthy Samsonite satraps Section SpecialOps.
Sometime soon savior snuck stealthily stealing sinful schleppers. sundown syzygy saw serendipitous, surreptitious, surreptitious segue-way shuttled safely Scottish shoals. Stigmatization stayed steady. Supplication statements swatted. Sole survivor swiftly spun self shaming sesquipedalian soliloquy. Sea side serenade soon spewed solipsism saving Slim Shady.
Sayonara seminal surfer swirling scarily sans sinister serpentine silent space.
Categories:
spayed, 10th grade, 11th grade,
Form:
Epic
Sherry was a junkyard pup.
She loved to run and play.
A gift to me, lifted up.
A blessing came that day.
Down the play yard slide she slid.
She loved to roll in dirt.
Obedient. Never hid.
Played rough, but never hurt.
“Go find a stick.” my command.
We had fun at the park.
First I’d chase her, then she, me.
Her eyes had that spark.
My first dog at age nineteen.
Oh furry little ball.
Learned to count from one to ten.
She, a sad girl's cure-all -
My purebred German shepherd
Had purebred little pups.
Afterward we had her spayed.
She died, life's bitter cups.
© July 9, 2011
Dane Smith-Johnsen
Written for Poetry Soup Member contest: Pick a Pet
Sponsored by: Francine Roberts
Categories:
spayed, angst, animals, death, nostalgia
Form:
Quatrain
Inspired by Jan Allison's brilliant "Eye Rowed My Hoarse",
top winner of the July 2021 Word Play contest.
I'm knew to this language; it baffles me sew!
With so many mysteries I wish too no -
I came to this country wile seeking warm climb
but I get awl flustered when righting a rime.
Sea, homophones throe me, they drive me inn seine
each weak I fined gnu ones, their such a big pane.
That last couplet had maybe seven ore ate
(I red it allowed butt I cant keep them strait!)
Eyed herd that this language can be vary crewel,
two words sound alike but there meanings are duel.
They say it’s the most daunting language yule find -
two solve this wood take a reel lode off my mined.
If a rose is arose, then wheel call spayed a spade,
let a male be a mail, and a maid be a made.
A horse is a hoarse, but of course, but of coarse,
though the rules of rite spelling are hard to in force.
I've pulled sow much hare out, aye think isle go bawled -
I'm certain I've misspelled sum words eye just scrawled.
Its enough to make even the mightiest feint
but aisle martial my forces and rays no complaint.
If this struck a cord - if you feel up a creak
know you're knot a loan, yore dismay's not unique.
Perhaps it is fête that has shone us assign,
let's bye some pail ail aura glass of wight whine.
And pleas don't dessert me, I so knead ewe they're,
I still wont to learn how two wright with moor flare.
Buy now you've disk hovered I rote this ingest,
if ewe care to try won yourself, bee my guessed!
Categories:
spayed, humorous, language,
Form:
Light Verse
ERNIE’S DOGGIE DELIMMA
,
THIS IS THE STORY OF ERNIE,
A WIENER DOG BREEDER HE WOULD BE,
SO HE BOUGHT HIS FIRST DOG FOR A HUNDRED BUCKS,
AND GAVE HIM THE NAME DOOGIE.
HE SAID TO HIS WIFE I HAVE AN IDEA,
TO MAKE MONEY BEYOND COMPARE,
SO ERNIE BOUGHT DOOGIE A FEMALE,
SO DOOGIE HIS LOVE HE COULD SHARE.
SO SNUGGLES THE FEMALE GOT PREGNANT,
AND I HAD DOLLAR SIGNS IN MY EYES,
BUT THEY WERE SO CUTE WHEN THEY WERE BORN,
MY WIFE COULDN’T SELL THEM TO MY SURPRISE.
AT FIRST I OWNED TWO NOW I OWN FOUR,
THEN DOOGIE DID IT ONCE MORE,
SO NOW I OWN FIVE,
AND YES I AM WIENEE DOG POOR.
NO MORE, NO MORE THE DECISION WAS MADE,
I HAD THEM ALL NUTERED,
I HAD THEM ALL SPAYED,
WITH MY POCKETS ALL EMPTY,
I CAN’T PAY MY DEBTS,
CAUSE ALL OF MY MONEY BELONGS TO THE VETS.
Categories:
spayed, funnywife, dog, dog, money,
Form:
Rhyme