Best Smooched Poems
As from his Book of Rules He read,
“Tsk-tsk tsk-tsk, St. Peter said.
So PICKED up I my bags and left
For that damnéd lower cleft.
I stomped away then turned and paused.
How much fuss had my fib caused?
A pardon'd come if I'd just wait.
Saint Pete just smiled then shut the gate.
God appeared with old St. Pete.
"We've a problem. We've got to meet."
St. Peter said, "It's quite unique.
It's your records. We took a peek
at our polls, all done by Gallup.
Found your number. It's not up.
It takes us two to set things right.
I brought God to use his might."
God said, "I've never sent souls back.
I did some research. Found a hack.
Turns out this problem's easily fixed.
Just stand still. My potion's mixed."
A wink a nod a look my way
and God undid the whole last day.
They shook my hand and bade farewell,
said I wouldn't Go to Hell.
They faded slowly from my sight
and dimmed their glow to black as night.
I reappeared, surprised my wife,
told her let's get on with life.
My death was just a clerical error.
They sent me back. It's only fairer.
We smooched and hugged, went out to eat.
Had pickled oysters fused with meat.
We ordered crêpes with grated pear
and lit 'em up to add some flair.
Then I pondered what to do.
I quick thought up a thing or two.
I'd profit from financial schemes
using cash inversion themes.
I'd buy a cat and teach it tricks
to wow the guests at trader Vic's.
I'd give them all tatami mats
and waterproof electric hats.
I paused a moment. I could see
My brand-new stuff was vintage me!
I mused a while: what to do?
I mused some more and then I knew.
I'm only happy being me.
My plan was simple as can be.
I'll carry on with selling stuff
like pitted prunes and candied snuff!
Categories:
smooched, business, humor, humorous, money,
Form:
Couplet
Dance ballerina dance
All the stations played it
Nat King Cole was the star
Couples smooched to the music
In every club and bar
Naughty things happened after dusk,
Girls wed, babies all premature.
Penned September 23 rd. 2013
Categories:
smooched, dance, love,
Form:
Acrostic
You didn't go to fight World War II in Japan,
You didn't ever go to FAT CITY,
but smooched with a DOLLY
in my washed and waxed Chevy van!
Looking like a real DUCK-BUTT,
you have the looks of a clown, not a CAT...
staring at that long-legged PAPER-SHAKER!
Eat more cereal, ANKLE-BITER!
You didn't learn to drive and lead,
for a grown man that's a NOSE-BLEED!
You didn't go to those night BASHES...
never being attracted to fake eyelashes!
GREASER, PILE-UP-Z'S or GET A LIGHTER!
Put down the HORN you bought at the Country Fair;
don't answer back as you usually do...CUT-THE-GAS,
or AGITATE-THE GRAVEL with quick toes!
Categories:
smooched, brother, family, funny, world
Form:
Rhyme
Our love is akin to that of the sunflower to the sun,
When my aureate prismatic sunrays splurge from my gun,
You open up your silk golden yellow petals,
Just to get smooched by the warm spangling rays.
Your ability to orient yourself to me,
And follow my diurnal course expeditiously,
Serves as one of the spectacular daylight dances galore,
Crowned by your floral head heliotropic terpsichore.
The seconds, minutes, and days we spend together,
So shall your stem get massive, erect and thicker,
And your large, oval, discretely toothed petiolate leaves,
Shall serve as a conspicuous attraction to insects.
Your floral head shall beam with thousands of achene pores,
As together we shall bring forth fruity seeds,
Seeds that shall be a prove of our love,
Seeds that will heal and provide protection like a glove.
So, as I retire to the horizon today,
Do not miss me so much as I go away,
Just look at the moon, for it reflects my light,
And rest assured that I shall rise very early to your sight.
Categories:
smooched, love, nature,
Form:
Rhyme
For my birthday wish
I prayed for a kiss
From a frog Prince
My delightful muse
With his clever ruse
Made me wince
Because that foul fellow
Turned me yellow
When I instead smooched a fish!
Categories:
smooched, fish, funny, humor,
Form:
Rhyme
WINDOW SHOPPING AT THE GYM
pomp flex
smooched pecs
glass necks
slaked sex
stocked Adonis pomp flex smooched pecs wink
gym’s monstrous blown glass necks, slaked sex drink
5/7/2017
Tyburn Form
Humor
Categories:
smooched, humor,
Form:
Tyburn
As summer withered to its end
I thought of Maggie as a friend
But when pale dew weighed down the grass
Young Maggie bloomed from spritely lass:
She burst to woman, overnight,
Bright smile, all curves, a pleasant sight—
We blushed and gazed through early fall,
Still young enough for touch football;
We ran and weaved and tumbled down
To lie in leaves hued autumn brown
While teammates mocked and rolled gloss eyes
At love arrived in friendly guise.
Then, charged with terror and romance,
I took my crush to Harvest Dance;
We closely swayed upon gym’s floor,
Her warmth and scent impelling more:
In crisp night air I clutched her hips
And breathed a fog as we touched lips.
For Halloween, we dressed the same,
My notebook margins held her name.
I lugged her books through cold to school,
Entranced and feeling not the fool
Until that day she softly said
At heart, she felt, our love was dead.
I pined for her through solstice drear
And Christmastime brought little cheer.
But, New Year’s Eve, I found a date
Who smooched and clinched ‘til very late:
That luscious fling turned winter hot,
And autumn love? I plumb forgot.
September 27, 2017
Autumn Romance Poetry Contest
Julie Rodeheaver, Sponsor
Categories:
smooched, autumn, romance, youth,
Form:
Rhyme
glad you forgave me
thanks so much for the wine--gee
it sure tastes funny
princess who smooched prince
morphed into a--ribbit--frog
magic gone awry
thanks for listening
just needing some good advice--
pastor, you still there?
birthday girl age three
waist deep in expensive gifts
plays with bags and bows
big bright birthday bash
gifts cake punch games raging blaze
ninety five candles
These may not meet the strictest standards for senryu!
May 28, 2018--not for a contest
Categories:
smooched, birthday, celebration, giving, wine,
Form:
Senryu
My old playboy uncle named Terry
Was bent yet wanted to remarry ;
Until he got a lass
Who smooched without much class,
That his loose joints needed surgery.
LIMERICK CONTEST - BACK BY POPULAR DEMAND
Sponsor: Jan Allison 4/29/2017
Categories:
smooched, age, old,
Form:
Limerick
I was nine
when for the first time
my playmate smooched me without my consent
Which is a crime.
I never talked to him again
but yes have to meet for several times.
It hold a regret in me that why I didn't slapped
or atleast fought with him.
You know na that regrets can never be in vain until you pays.
I was fifteen
when for the first time
she told me about his father's evil side,
How he is sipping his princess' life.
She told me not to ask her to fight for right
because he is his father & she is her child.
As I knew that if this time
this woman kept quiet
she will be in the same regret that I had from nine
& I will never be able to forgive me for unabling to save a life.
In the starting I asked her to speak up
then I requested her
In the end I forced her.
The moment it all sorted it became
a victory of mine over regret
a victory of pure soul over lusty wolf
a victory of humanity over evil.
Categories:
smooched, abuse, child abuse, childhood,
Form:
ABC
We smooched around the floor
Her body pressed tight to mine
I was high on stout and scotch
She on gin and sweet white wine
And we swayed around that room
In a world all of our very own
Engrossed each with the other
Part of a crowd but really all alone
In that room of spinning lights
And smoke and heat and noise
In that room of search and seek
Of single girls and single boys
Each body peeled from the other
As the music came briefly to an end
And in that intermission
Each found another friend
And the smooching re started
The dancing cheek to cheek
Friday night relaxation
After a long long week
Just as the last waltz started
She slid back into my embrace
Body moulded back to body
Pleasure painted on her face
And we knew how we knew
How our evening would end
For things just can’t be any better
When you lover is your best friend
We smooched around the floor
Her body pressed tight to mine
I was high on stout and scotch
She on gin and sweet white wine
Categories:
smooched, dance, love, passion, romance,
Form:
Rhyme
On the sixteenth of May, you wore white — I wore black.
It was warm, we felt pleased and we smooched with a smack.
All four parents had come. We would reap what we sowed.
It felt right. It felt good. But behold — it just snowed!
In the hope of mid-May, we made plans with no doubt.
I’ll do this — you’ll do that. Should have googled our route....
Both your sisters showed up. All bode well — well it bode.
What a car we would drive! But it suddenly snowed!
On the lawn, in the sun, we meandered and mused.
What a house we would build! We were brightly enthused.
And that evening the guests brought of presents a load.
We unwrapped — oohed and aahed. Yet the darn thing just snowed!
Was the pastry to taste? ’Twas a fav'rite of mine.
It was French. It pleased all — both the rough and the fine.
Every bud squirmed with joy, and it clearly showed
as we drank and we yacked on the day when it snowed!
We were set to drive on — from point S to point E.
It’s a cinch in mid-May! Who would dare disagree?
I went ‘vroom!' You went ‘go!’ All the luggage was stowed.
But the sky hid its face for the world had snowed.
Many Mays may have passed, and we’ve seen this and that.
We have lost and amassed. And we should have grown fat.
We have grown, to be fair, and we’re still on the road
from point S to point E back in May when it snowed.
We keep vrooming along, and by now we have learned
how to turn up the heat and then eat what we’ve earned.
Warm it is in the car; far — our distant abode.
Thus we mosey in peace — even if... it has snowed.
I can’t say any sooths; I won’t read leaves or guts.
Most predictions are bunk — there are few ifs or buts.
All we plan will come true... or it won't — no one knows.
But I do know one thing — May’s the month when it snows.
Categories:
smooched, love, marriage, philosophy, symbolism,
Form:
Lyric
the heat outside
was humid but
the heat inside
was hotter
my marshmallows
softened as her
chocolate melted
our fire was cooking
with fractions
of friction we
smooched
and became
smores
Categories:
smooched, muse,
Form:
Smooched in candy apple she pouched her cinnamon lips
The fair had come into town with travellers and wagons
It was that time of the year when dreams would come true
Glittered in mellow fairy dust of innocence and imagination
Lucy was finally old enough to mount the carnival horse
The carrousel took her on a roller coaster ride to heaven
Golden locks mingled with the wild stallions quivering mane
A cow girl on paradise’s tracks to unbound passion and joy
‘More and once again please just for one time’
Ears full of musical aura of unfettered hooves clattered
Popped the drums as they galloped across the wild prairie
As she went dizzy with laughter and the charm of delight
She embraced the withers and bounced up in the saddle
Looked with swelling pride at the crest full of promise
Tiny legs barely reached the stirrups feathered in tussles
‘Better than chocolate sprinkles on coconut iced cream’
A match of tender caress and touch of rocking intuitive trust
Daddy smiled and vowed to never grow up
Categories:
smooched, beauty,
Form:
Free verse
*Image of Flower Purple Orchids by Pixabay.
Dream Makers
fresh
half-castes
tranced set eyes
moored wild sparkles
smooched perianths hues
moon chant ripen charm bud
purplish-lacquered functions
claimed space far and few
*cheat death to thrive
warm broad spots
mauve blooms
dense
*Epiphyte: Plants that grow on another plant but are not parasitic.
2021 August 12
Categories:
smooched, flower, growth, metaphor,
Form:
Verse