Best Scrivener Poems

From 2010. Narrator is Robert Gibbs, snooty White House Press Secretary.

Lay, O Lord, a curse on press men, rude and churlish, sad, obsessed men 
Who persist to query me on matters they know I must ignore. 
As I parry, neatly jinking, Tapper stares at me,...

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Less than twenty-four hours after dashing off a poem 
   explaining why i wanted to die
found me experiencing physical duress vis a vis, 
   a bowel movement wherein waste unable to expel 
   from the anus of this guy
which...

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while figuratively hunting
and pecking around me noggin
force hum theme to write about
lo and behold, the solution
stared me right in front
of my little knob nub nose with gentle clout

cuz, as an avid bookworm, the dictionary,
I enjoy expending hours
to drink up etymological history
relating to the origin and
historical...

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(21st century pearly white prosthetics,
restored jaw bar wah key) 

Aye noel hunger bristle,
and when false teeth soak at night 
     in tandem with stubby facial gristle
har reckon noah kisses
 
     far me under mistle
toe, which prickly stubble...

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I Asked Myself A Rhetorical Question...

Asper daily expounding fostering
     inchoate manifesting mod
     er writ writing quality,
     solitary scrimmage tackling
     undertaking, yielding whir
ring, sputtering, kickstarting, and
    ...

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Inside The Mysterious Enigmatic Fragmentary...
Mortal Mind Of Matthew Scott Harris
ENTER AT YOUR OWN RISK!

Seedy gobbledygook ergot
visibly argot bubbled, burbled, bustled...forth 
yea...give garbled, jangled, warbled shoutout
if ye doth render
mug gadabout totally confounding,

this unfettered voluminous confection
ruff lee in toto as sample
doggone freelance gargon
sublime red rover - misaligned...

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Hear Me, O Muse, no moos or cluckings, muckings or horns of fog

Do sound the clamoring claxons of the bardics that be written by William McGonagal o’ the Bog,

That Laird of Lamentations Disastrous, that Scot Wha’ Hey Nonny Nonny,

Laureate of the quite awful woeful grueful...

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Neither fame, nor fortune sought,
sans this anonymous wordsmith,
whose quirky pastiche (no matter
evokes collywobbles, when risky
business undertaken to spill forth
most confidential personal woes),

broadcasting a heart of darkness,
Joseph Conrad might find quaint-
lee amusing, & considerably less
far reaching encompassing than
his (former) humanity ink home
passing (just one heir iz...

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Pursuit for elusive prey
teases yours truly
into treacherous catacombs
dangerous mentally
challenging pitfalls,

sets small hairs of back
on camp creeks edge
of night, where dark shadows
evoke outer limits
of twilight zone

prompting me constantly questioning
purposefulness, qua hair raising pursuit
embarking these modern roman times
all for naught,
nonetheless I chide self

failing to heed
emotional, mental, psychological...fallout
in...

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Ah Such A Great Night... 
To Fish In The Cyber Sea

Always does this generic guy abhor
inflicting pain and suffering,
     hence I haint n'er fished before,
and even metaphorically
     referencing piscine creatures
     (strictly as prosaic...

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Winkin Blinkin And Nod, Sans...
Wonderful World Of Dreamland Furloughed!

Hours elapsed since I did sleep off
and feed my belly from the trough.

What...the...creaking screech re: sound
ding, (an unexpected  pro noun
sub bull mashup attributed 
to partial government shutdown
point middle finger at dented prez clown.)

The night of my...

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"Another Fine Moist"

Underground with the worms?
It's another fine moist
You've gotten me in, Stanley.
N'est-ce pas?
"The night was moist," wrote Billy Crystal,
As the writers-blocked scrivener  in
"Throw Mama from the Train."
You run into many old friends, here.
Here in the slime is where I'm at.
Let me show you...

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Mine Nightmare With Social Anxiety,...
Now Mostly Purged

Decades removed when body electric
felt tortured reverberated, and quaked
with MegaDeath repercussions tattooing, 
piercing, foisting, ensnaring, drubbing
 
drum beat indelibly 'pon psyche NON 
MEMORABLE years gone bye felled 
psyche with incorporation, viz alphabet 
chromed facebook, poetry soup of physio

logical symptoms...

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zilch = the current net result dabbling with said medium
which upside per literary skill 
   allows, enables and provides
a golden opportunity 
   to write my own nonestablishmentarian epitaph.

Though gleeful at assiduous followers 
(one attractive babe, who responds 
nearly instantaneously per my...

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(while trapped in Pottstown 
Memorial Hospital parking lot).

My humble apology to those,
who posted uber up lyft ting messages
to this Macbook Pro Facebook keeper,
without said scrivener swiftly
tailoring timely acknowledgement
from one harried styled leaper,

thus feel free to take
leguminous litigious licorice flavor
flav can deed extra-legal
imprisonment against my liberty,
(though...

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