Best Sadme Poems
My box of sadness too.
A box full of sadness I store under my bed.
With thoughts so sad
Making me wish I was dead.
With one look underneath my bed.
Memories of you jump inside my head.
Like a Jack in the box, who is trapped inside.
I stuffed my feelings in this box.
I will not surrender to any sadden thoughts.
Shutting the box full of spider webs.
I do not want to feel the deepness of sad, I hide.
This sadness I store back under my bed.
My feelings are better trapped inside.
Staring at the box with my eyes open wide.
Tears start to fall the ones I buried inside
Following footsteps with no guide.
Why did I bother to remove the lid.
Sadness always makes it hard to decide
The pain my heart does not want to see.
Hiding the sadness, I yet have not cried.
I will not release my sadness, and set it free.
I have managed to put the sadness out side of me.
This sadness only belongs to me.
How could you leave with out telling me bye.
I pretend to live my life so cheerfully.
It takes a real person to bring me down.
My sadness trapped behind a fake bully.
Like a smile from a clown .
I put on a show and block any sad thought.
Not allowing my self to drown in self pitting ways.
You left me alone after bringing me into this world.
The one and only person who could be there for me.
In my troubles and need she left me.
Every one saying it might have been suicide.
How could you leave us behind with misery and blame.
The sadness of your shame is what I hide
A box of my sadness under my bed.
By:P.D.----I guess that is one of my sadness. A true one at that.
To:The Rambling Poet- This is a challenge called by you.
Trapped inside with a sadness. The other part of me
I carefully adjust the mask, before I face the day,
the one that I've been wearing ever since he went away.
His coming brought a happiness like one I'd never known.
His going left an emptiness that chills me to the bone.
His sisters and the others try so hard to take his place.
For their sake I must smile and show of sorrow not a trace.
My firstborn and my only son, of whom I was so proud.
I mourn the boy and the man, but nevermore aloud.
The mask allows me to go on, I work, I write, I play.
Only when at last alone, I put the mask away.
By: Joyce Johnson
For contest "It's Mask Time" placed no. 8
Won a 3rd place
Intravenous therapy,
She's watching over me.
Grasping my hand,
She whispers, "please dear, count to ten."
Six... piercing paralysis,
Her hand cold as the air.
She lets go, leaving me there.
Alone, squirming, for just one prayer.
Yelling, and screaming.
Kicking, twisting, and questioning.
Nothing happens, its all in my head.
Frozen, welded to my metal death bed.
Minutes and hours tick away,
Slow, painful psychological decay.
I try to think of hating her,
But those thoughts just blur,
her pretty face.
Then I realize why I'm actually here.
Amidst the psychotic silence,
she walks in, and smiles.
She says, "Darling, this won't take a while."
Okay I say, dismissing the horror of the situation.
Her angelic voice, sedating all sensations.
I see the scalpels, forceps,
retractors, and clamps.
Completely trusting, blinded by the hanging lamp.
It won't hurt, so doctor please just cut.
Bloody plasmic mess,
Pressure to suppress,
Wide open arteries, surgical misery.
No anesthetics. Painless, no distress.
She carves a circle in my chest.
I don't contest, just attest.
Let her carve into me, at my own request.
Just promise, no cardiac arrest.
She pulls out my heart.
Leaving my entire chest hollow.
No more emotions,
the hardest pill to swallow.
But it is why I'm here.
No reason to fear.
Doctor, all I ask is you don't hurt it anymore.
You do what you want with it, it's completely yours.
Now I'm heartless, and only function with my brain.
Emotionless logic was the only way to sustain.
My future seems brighter,
All my loves spent, cut from the source.
I feel so much lighter, of course.
It was the heart.
Thank you doctor, for pulling me apart,
making me feel so alive.
The love, the emotions, the surgery,
my new will to survive.
Thats when she said,
"Darling, it's all in your head. You've been dead since we first met."
Sometimes I wonder.........
Where will I be when I get old
Who will love me for my soul
Thoughts of loneliness cross my mind
Am I running out of time?
It’s so scary in this desolate place
Staring out a window into space
What have I done during my time here on earth?
Who will be waiting on me? Did I earn my worth?
Life passes by really fast
Always thought my time would last
Thinking of my people that have gone on before me
Do they know…...Is that where they’ll be?
Remembering the last smile I saw on his face
Will I have to run his same race
Will they leave me alone to think of my time of the past
Or will they surround me to celebrate and have a blast
Pictures and memories is all that’s left
Tear after tear while I take deep breaths
Stones and lettered monument will be there for me
The sunshine and the storms pass while I sleep
In this narrow place I will lie
Unable to speak, unable to cry
Thy will is done and now time moves on
Who is next? Who will be gone?
Sometimes I wonder……………
By Johnnie Eaves
Oh gentle rain
come to me now
please wash this pain from me
in lifes unkindness I'm immersed
and need to be set free
Oh gentle breeze
please breathe new life
into this dying soul
from my travels I am weary
refresh and make me whole
Oh flowers sweet
let me hide
among your beauty fair
touch me with your loveliness
and leave your beauty there
Oh come to me
in kindness please
with your gentle ways
the world it has inflicted me
and darkened all my days
Oh come to me
and touch my heart
please change this dark to light
take away the ugliness
that turned my day to night
I bent down to pick up a penny from the frozen ground.
I could smell myself, the acrid stench of sweat and soot,
the taint of vapored vagrancy
that marked my movements, masking me from the reality that used to be.
I hate me and what I am, more than you could ever think to,
but more so becuase you do, with your limp laughter and scared stares.
I never knew my life never needed me to know it could all go away in a single day.
I see it all through dirty windows draped in singed eyelashes and gutter grime,
the pathetic gazes from afar as another afternoon of sale shopping and shoe sizing is ruined
by my appalling appearance.
"How dare you be here! What's wrong with you?"
"Go get a job you junkie, you slob, just jump a bus so you can't disgust us with your sewer
shoes and hard luck blues. You deserve the dirt and a kick in the teeth from the steel-tipped
toe of a jackboot too. No one wants to see a scummy sack of crap like you, bending down to
pick our scraps off the frozen ground."
The helping hand of man slaps the taste of humanity from my mouth with each volatile volley
of acid arrow analogies angrily slung and fired furiously from the bows of bastard
businessmen and bleach blonde bimbos.
My weary wounds fill with the sea-salt of sarcastic statements and unflattering finger
gestures from frat boys as I bend down to pick up a penny I found on the frozen ground.
"Head's up means luck," Abe smiled at me, and suddenly my thoughts began to run
differently.
I took a long look at the lingering light of one of the sweetest sunsets I had ever seen, and
the simplicity and majesty washed over me.
There was no use in listening to abuse and accusations and obtuse observations any more.
I was being shown a door.
Wrapped in the warmth of the amber and amethyst glow, I finally smile for a little while and
close my dirty windows against the icy winds of waning words.
Tomorrow, someone will bend down to pick me up from the frozen ground.
there was a moment
I felt our hearts brush,
there was within time
a thought, mine you would crush
those inhumane moments
within the walls of your world,
stripped me of feeling
and all my emotions unfurled
threads of memory
drift through my mind,
I pick up the ends
to try to make them align
I have flashes of joy
that pinpricked our life,
but the strongest in visions
are the ones staged of strife
I remember all the love
you stripped from my soul,
I remember all the nights
wishing I was once again whole
these agonies I’ve bled
on my wedding dress,
I’ve erased, the seeing
of you ripping my flesh
so these words aren’t wrought
within the pain of despair,
for I choose to remember
the very best we shared there
let the Road to Perdition
that I traveled with you,
carry the heartache and pain
so we can say this adieu
the thought I now cradle
to the end of my lines,
is of laughing and smiling
in the heart of springtime
your power has fallen
and can’t hurt me again
as I sit here, wonder,
was the beginning worth the end
The bees buzzed as they always did
and storms receded.
Silence hushed itself inside a shell.
Jackrabbits hopped away from hell
still intoxicated.
The village swarmed with threats.
Honest men could no longer
make their way. Poets payed
their debts for being who they were;
blessed, and afraid.
Wives bled, chasing phantoms in the
snow. "Art's no consolation."
Husbands crept along their spikes
of faithlessness. Rabbits left.
High in space their conscience burrows.
He drags along his skinny guest;
terrific, bleeding & uncouth.
Mercy equates with Obesity -
"Let me bulge and burst my longing!
Make me fatter than the fattest Truth."
A woman yelps, "I like a good romantic"
and so she laughs and feigns forget.
"Be like the constant nights of snow."
But when the orchards raze themselves to bone -
he pays attention to her neglect.
Ponies stall. Apollo's thief was
phony. Hope is tall and all his
hollow follies, "Entertain the queen!"
somehow like a burning house afloat
with sediment & gasoline.
_"Is all my life in vain? The puppets
with their masquerading calls -
do they see me, twisting nettle,
knucklecutted at midnight, precious,
unseen like a fete with no stall?"_
"Ah, but you've met in Life's divining mirror
the very ladder of your beauty's fall.
Yet still in abstinence, still in nothingness
along the ridge of this exquisite loneliness -
crawl."
Her writes are touching
They bring tears to your eyes
You can sense her fears
From the woman inside
Through the eyes of another
Saying " the time has come "
To begin the climb
Towards the sun
The other side
Under the moonlit sky
Suicide, feelings of
The questions, why?
Please forgive me
Today's the day
I'm finally free
No looking back for me, as I pray
It's now or never
Please remember me
My hidden thoughts
Will set me free
I have a dream
So far away
I believe it's time
Don't cry when you say
Goodbye
I wonder, I remember
Life is to short
On reflection
The above I abort
On the wings of an angel
I will travel one day
But until that time
This lost soul will stay
Dear Lord
Is there a heaven?
A little precious angel says
My family, love and faith
Will see me through my days
Having read a poets poems yesterday, i wrote this using the titles
to her sad, but heartfelt pieces
~ ~ And the ladies name is Colleen Bono ~ ~
http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/poetry-soup-4.php
From the moment that you shut that door
I knew that things had changed
I am not the man I was
For I'm broken and deranged
Empty thoughts now steal my mind
I do not feel the same
You've taken all I've given you
And offered me the blame
With each breath I take, I pray each day
Will somehow be my last
I taste the words I heard you say
A reflection from the past
The noise that's in the silence
Is screaming out your name
Hope and trust have been replaced
With loneliness and shame
I'm stuck in broken promises
A victim of your lies
My heartbeat now a stranger
My soul doesn't recognize
The noise that's in the silence
Still haunts me everyday
The noise I hear is a heart that breaks
Can somebody take it away
When you pulled the trigger
you came to me and tried to love me
ask my forgiveness,
it made me cry, it was so cold
I shook with your suffering
I drew you in the afterlife
alone and crying with gods light
asking you to come
Your remorse,
your shame, a mistake,
you had so much to give
i painted two trees
one that was dying
the other was dead
the tree loved you
amd misses you still
Second hand smoke can kill you
But so can second hand love
Like a jumper on top of a building
'Til someone gives him a shove
You compare me to the way he was
Yet you never mention his name
But everytime I don't stack up
I'm the one that you blame
I see the way you look at me
With that cold and empty stare
Holding me and thinking of him
While wishing he was there
You talk about our future
While living in the past
I tell you how much I love you
You tell me I'm moving too fast
I die a little more each day
Because it's him you're thinking of
It's such a painful way to die
This thing, called second hand love
Once again, you’re putting out your blinds
It’s this wicked game you play at minds
With the chiseled pot concealed,
My heart’s cards are now revealed.
I’m getting broken down again.
You’ve locked me up into this stain,
And as I try to raise heart’s chase
You lay there still, poker faced.
You force me into this blinding bet
Where no one is allowed to check,
Still you show me all your faces
As your wretched cards take their places.
‘Guess I have to get a grip,
Your words are dealing against my lip.
For they’re begging me to call
And see if I’ve lost my heart at all.
I’m no longer your full (fool) of hearts,
Letting you invade my private parts.
I’ve beseeched for long enough
For you to fall from your discomfited bluff.
You stand as an immortal Ace,
Wounded through my composed face.
Though I never knew it could,
My heart is now lost for good.
© 2009 Stefania Carmen Misaila
This beating heart keeps haunting me in the dark,
When the sun walks steps to the surface, painting a glowing fade
I try to forget, no I do not need to pursue the missing element
For the element may have a substitute, mirroring characteristics of it, as well
But why does this aching not depart?
What pumps through these chambers is a sickness, tearing me apart
And in the night, when breathing doesn’t exist in presence,
Silent and still, except for the beating of this heart
This heart is isolated, and it screams woe with every thump
Surpass the disgust of it and hunt prey till successful
But the bait fails to attract my desire, and I am once again defeated
And the nibble, which also teases my wretched heart, leaves me beaten
The element persists in mystery, and I sense how unattainable it is
If only I could seek means of expressing how strongly I covet you
Your everything, but in importance, your scarlet ardor
Oh, how I would decease the beating of my disturbing heart for the life of your striking love,
But then, where would I go?
I feel as if my movement would perish without you, my love
So I wait, hands on the clock now ticking louder than my horrid heart
My heart battles time, impatient of the day I can obtain my element
But perfect element, I shall wait for you.
Trying to fill the void,
makeup all destroyed,
standing in your pretty dress,
hair all crazy and a mess.
Flowers are everywhere,
go over and take a chair,
watch the people walking by,
no one notices as you cry.
All here for the same reason,
it's like the changing of the seasons,
don't worry about me I am fine,
maybe you need a glass of wine.
All the decorations oh so fancy,
being here was never chancy,
flowers, music, and the candles,
hope it wasn't too hard to handle.
I loved you til the end,
I held you close my dearest friend,
now it's time to put me in the ground,
you were my best treasure ever found.