Best Peeved Poems


My Least Favorite Things

To the tune of.. “These are a Few of my Favorite Things“.

Bass boomers spreading their mis’ry in traffic
Craving attention and driving me spastic,
Not caring an oodle for anyone else,
This **** will drive one to poor mental health!

Cops who ignore them and keep right on driving,
Passing we drivers who are suff’ring and sighing,
Speeding, ignoring all laws of the road ,
Why do they think they’re exempt from the code?!

That lady texting who’s climbing your bumper,
Foll’wing for miles, you’d sure like to dump her,
Getting so peeved I just ran a red light!…
But she’s hanging in there with all of her might!

Here comes a pick up and he’s really flying,
can’t push me over but he’s really trying,
sans blinkers he cut me in one single swoop,
You scraped my bumper you dang nincompoop!

Sweating and trying, for my place I’m vying,
Choking on gas fumes, ‘n some kid is crying
That lady just stopped for a friggin green light,
I screeched on my brakes and near died of fright!

That bass nut’s still booming, my blood  pressure’s zooming,
That green light stopper’s picked this time for grooming
That texter’s horn behind me is starting to blow,
The light turned red and she thinks I should go!

These are a few of my least favorite things,
That I could avoid if I only had wings…


I commute 3 hours a day and this is just 
a sample. : )




,
Categories: peeved, funny, me, light, green,
Form: Rhyme

Letter To An Old Friend

Dear S.,

I was in the market yesterday
digging through a tray of grapes
trying to find the freshest bag,
but most seemed half-decayed.
I was just about to leave
(feeling mighty peeved),
but then - you won't believe!
Carole King came on the radio
and the world began to move real slow.
Even the fruit held its breath
(half-rotten and close to death).
She sang about the earth moving
and the sky tumbling,
and it made me think of you.
I thought of that summer -
the one before our senior year
when your dad taught us how to drive
(and got annoyed and made me cry).
Remember that?
We washed his car with soap and tears,
sipping on bottles of cold root beer.
Out of tune, we'd dance and sing
along to songs by Carole King.
Well, I want you to know - 
You made my day,
even though you're far away.  
And, you know, Carole said it best:
I feel my heart start to trembling
whenever you're around.
I miss that. 
And I miss you.

Love,
Me
Categories: peeved, memory,
Form: Free verse

Premium Member A Heart-To-Heart Talk

"Why do you love me, Dear?" she cooed.
    "You're cuddly, cute, and sweet," he said.
    "Your mama's cat is too," she cried
    and made some distance in the bed.

    "Just teasing, Hon! I wasn't through,"
    he reasoned with his peeved young wife.
    "I'd be a wretched, lonely man
    without you to complete my life."

    "Now, why do you love me?" he asked.
    Her answer: "You're so good and kind
    and very easy on the eyes.
    A man like you is quite a find."

    He smiled. "Such precious words, my love,        
    but you've described our pastor too
    and other men we both could name.
    Why was it I you chose to woo?"

    "Your point is gently made," she said.
    "My HEART chose you, and yours chose me."
    Mere words will never be enough
    to tell what eyes of love can see. 



Date: January 29, 2018
Contest Title: Eloquent Banter: You Tease me So Nicely       Placed 1st      
Sponsor: Edward McCall

January 7, 2019, entered in Mark Toney's 2019 Poetry Marathon,
mile 10     placed 7th of 10

September 10, 2020
entered in the Strand Completely Your Choice (7) Poetry Contest
Categories: peeved, cute, love,
Form: Quatrain

Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry


Premium Member God Whispers

Some people speak so softly
that our ears they do strain..
We ask them to repeat themselves
over and over again..
It's frustrating to both parties and
some times they get peeved, as
the speaker and the listener want
their message received..
We live in such a hurry and get
caught up in scuttle buttle,
that we often don't hear God's voice
as his messages can be subtle..
When you arise from sleep as the
darkness meets the dawn, listen
closely for his whispers as it's us
for which God longs..
Categories: peeved, god,
Form: Light Verse

Premium Member Precariously Personable

Precariously personable 
Privately peeved
Parading pompously
Pronouncing pretty paragraphs
Possibly pretending pompousness
Poetic permanence 
Powerfully 
Performed
Categories: peeved, 10th grade, 11th grade,
Form: Alliteration

Premium Member Six-Word Couplet Series -August 2018

Near Earth Objects
NASA watches sky
Asteroids whiz by


It's About Time
`Crazy Rich Asians'
Exceeding all expectations


Chasing Unicorns
Unicorn float stuck
Unicorn startups' luck


Truth Isn't Truth
"Truth isn't truth"
Message for youth?


Culinary Robotics
Creator robot burger
Fad or future?


Oui Oui No No
Public urinals conceived
Paris residents peeved


Take It To The Limit
Eagles Greatest Hits
Most platinum certificates
© Mark Toney  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: peeved, conflict, film, humorous, music,
Form: Couplet


Premium Member Betty the Cook

What a spectacle Betty was making
of herself in the kitchen while baking.
She kept tripping and falling.
Other cooks found it galling
all the dishes each day she kept breaking.

Today it’s much better she’s faring,
for the cause was made known for her erring.
Betty now feels relieved
that her boss is not peeved
since new spectacles she has been wearing!


(this has now been revised as a quintain for Joe maverick's contest.
If you happen to see the quintain version. I'm just curious to 
to know which seems more effective, this limerick version or the quintain form?)
Categories: peeved, funny,
Form: Limerick

Premium Member Oui Oui No No

Public urinals conceived

Paris residents peeved
© Mark Toney  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: peeved, conflict, french, humorous, nature,
Form: Couplet

Premium Member Caesar Sees Her Alliteration

Sea Czar Caesar sees her seated on a cedar two-seater beside the East Sea Seder.  He grieves since he sees his sister, Esther Dexter, with her red festered blister, next her.  

Guinevere is pleased her eager leader, Caesar’s seen her.  In degrees, she breezes, “Sir, see our sea surf?  These sea treasures are pleasures to sea czars and we serfs.”

Caesar desires, if it please her, to seize her and squeeze her.

But Esther Dexter who’s next her interjects the elder perspective protector with an inflective reflector.

“Easy, wheezy geezer Caesar.  It may please her if you squeeze her at your leisure, but if you seize her in a fever, she’s sure to seizure; so leave her at ease, sir!”

Peeved Caesar, seethes, sneezes, wheezes, breathes and proceeds.  He’s pissed his less best pest of a sister, Esther Dexter, with her red festered blister, persists amidst this tryst.  

He flees to cleave Guinevere’s knees.  “See here, dear Guinevere.  I’m neither teaser nor misfeasor geezer and will not proceed to cede to my tongue twisted sister, Esther Dexter.  Please heed to receive my believable plead so I may leave relieved.”

Guinevere is pleased with her Caesar and suggests to Esther Dexter to leave her and Caesar forever.
Categories: peeved, humorous, love, passion, sea,
Form: Alliteration

Premium Member Cook Betty

The cooks in the restaurant found it appalling
how Betty messed up every pie she was baking
and how- from her tripping and falling -
dish after dish Cook Betty kept breaking.
What a spectacle of herself she was making!

Today, however, Betty is relieved
because of how much better she is faring.
All the other cooks are no longer peeved,
for Cook Betty has stopped all her erring
thanks to the new spectacles she's wearing!


(Revision of my previous post, which needed to be a quintain
 for Joe Maverick's Contest)
Categories: peeved, funny,
Form: Quintain (English)

Drool the Duck

Drool the duck got mad at a bull and whacked up a bee
                          She was so bad she took the cat for a cup of tea
                                            Cat was a mangler
                                            Upcountry wrangler
                 Peeved the duck with the muck and mucked her up with a pee











DROOL THE DUCK: Limerick: copyright© RAJAT KANTI CHAKRABARTY November 2014
Categories: peeved, fun, nonsense,
Form: Limerick

Premium Member Blowing Ma's Social Security Check

When Ma got her social security check

    To the Cripple Creek casinos she'd trek

         Coins passed through her greedy paws

             To feed the slots' gaping maws

                  Leaving Pa peeved wanting to wring her neck

Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
© All Rights Reserved
Categories: peeved, funny,
Form: Limerick

Lyric Man Disillusioned Me

Dee said she loved me I was pleased 
She wanted me I was relieved
But Dee let me down
I felt like a clown
Turned down to be a man I peeved
Categories: peeved, friendship, fun,
Form: Limerick

Unanswered Text

Send a text
And what comes next
Perhaps is a reply...
But maybe not
And you know what?
You'll have no reason why.

Was not received
Or someone's peeved
And chooses to ignore it...
'Cause on the screen
What you might mean
Has no way to explore it.

So what to do?
I've thought it through
And think you should resend it...
But that advice
May not suffice,
Thus I cannot defend it.

Instead I wait
In such a state
That keeps my nerves a'jangle...
And check my phone
'Cause one alone
Can make those nerves untangle.
Categories: peeved, technology,
Form: Rhyme

Rama Lamba Ding Dong

Rama-Lamba-Ding-Dong

Its official, officials in Sudan are peeved
The audacity smugglers have got up their sleeve
It’s even been said that they’re losing sleep
Even as they spend their time counting sheep
Sheep are a valued commodity there
Ewes even more, so their numbers are rare
So the smugglers all want to get ewes past their guard
And the tricks they are using are making it hard
To tell ewes from rams, they now have begun
To sew parts on the ewes to make them look hung
Authorities never had noticed before
Till a ram “female-squatted” just outside their door
Upon further inspection the guards had to see
The ram parts were sewed on, the ram was a she
The guards are now looking at sheep differently
To see how they walk, to see how they pee
And when they suspect that a ram is a ewe
They turn the sheep over for a real close up view
And just where are they getting the parts they sew on
Are there rams waking up finding parts are now gone
And if parts are gone, what are they to do
They can’t service the herd; they’re too tough for lamb stew
Maybe they’re good for their wool just the same
A little less rowdy, a little more tame
A little bit shy when it comes to the ewes
Without male parts they just don’t have the clues
When ewes are – well ready – out in the glens
These poor altered fellows just want to be friends
Categories: peeved, animal, corruption,
Form: Rhyme
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