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Best Outhouses Poems


Premium Member No Toilets To Flush
We who remember outhouses
consider flushing toilets
the next thing to heaven.

Yet, we know, in heaven—
no need to search—
they do not exist.
The Apostle Paul said, 
“We shall not all sleep,
but we shall all be changed.”

No freckles,
no cowlick,
no twisted bones,
no missing members,
no lack of understanding.

Questions will all be...

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© Cona Adams  Create an image from this poem.
Categories: outhouses, humor,
Form: Free verse
Premium Member Elegy To a Family House
Why should I remain a family house
If I am dilapidated, shattered and tattered
In this summer of old age.

Why should I remain a family house
If the house garden bears a barren look
Tearing away its leaves and flowers.

Why should I remain a family house
If the birds do...

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Categories: outhouses, family,
Form: Elegy
Premium Member Whistling In the Dark
(A Rave By A Poet)      

Remember when you were a child? 
Adults seemed then to be in control, 
Almost like Gods, with special powers
That almost always knew
When you'd been up to mischief.
‘Playing with matches again Brian? '
What a childish view...

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Categories: outhouses, childhood, education, fun, games,
Form: Blank verse

Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry



Two-Ply
Two-ply in roses of yellow and pink
rolls and sings to the touch 
of fingers on its faintly-scented folds,
giving miles of pleasure to soft seats 
on hard covers all in the name of 
modern convenience which is a change 
from old catalog sheets housed in 
quarter-moon...

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Categories: outhouses, humor, humorous,
Form: Prose
Premium Member Elegy To a Family House-Win
Why should you remain a family house
If you are dilapidated, shattered and tattered
In this summer of old age.

Why should you remain a family house
If the house garden bears a barren look
Tearing away its leaves and flowers.

Why should you remain a family house
If the birds do...

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Categories: outhouses, family,
Form: Elegy
Good Ol' Triple-Six and the Eternal Drive-By - Part 2
- and, anyway, who breaks wind over double-M, a. k. a. Manson,

Marilyn?

I'll give a ride on my razor any day to

The-Second-Prime-of-Nine-to-the-Sixth,

who was around long before CD's, DVD's, MTV, and YOU / MYtube,

spitting out the healing heat, the wound-cleansing apocalypse

of what some denounce as straight from...

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Categories: outhouses, hope, inspirational, jesus,
Form: Free verse



My Man-Child
I wish outhouses were still in fashion 
For I would be sat in one right now 
Away from the hypocrisy that is you 
But still close enough 
So when I hollered your name 
You’d still answer 

By God I don’t know how your mother managed...

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Categories: outhouses, blessing, crazy, funny, how
Form: Free verse
Premium Member Halloween Tricksters
Kids nowadays don't know the fine art of staging Halloween tricks,
(Though they are very adept at fleecing me for candy to get their kicks!)
Tricks we did as kids would no doubt today land us in the slammer,
Causing outrage and rancor by folks for our hides...

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Categories: outhouses, halloween, humorous,
Form: Rhyme
Premium Member Halloween Then and Now

The child I was, so long ago
Knew not of Halloween.
The sweet treats that are now bestowed
By me were never seen.

The preacher at our church denounced
Halloween as evil.
Celebrating it, he said, was 
Honoring the devil.

Of course there always were the teens
Who parked buggies on barns
And tipped...

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Categories: outhouses, childhood, funny, nostalgia, me,
Form: Ballad
Premium Member The Outhouse Market
A flea market called the outhouse market
is located just outside of York Town.
And an arrow sign nailed to an old tree
points you to the best flea market around.

Cause it's hidden behind some outhouses
folks need to look for it, it's hard to find.
And yet, it has...

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Categories: outhouses, city, confusion, fantasy, feelings,
Form: Quatrain
Premium Member The Rembrandt of the Great Midwest
Clyde Pucelli was known as The Rembrandt of The Great Midwest!

He was an itinerant painter, esteemed as one of the best!

With his brushes and well-blended oils he'd render a masterpiece;

His fame spread since he specialized in hues of white and cerise.

He traveled in an old...

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Categories: outhouses, art, humorous,
Form: Rhyme
Rainy Day Sonnet
Rainy Day Sonnet.

 It is so quiet here in my village when it is raining
 dogs in outhouses are overtaken by melancholia.
It appears so useless to bark and their dream might
 be of an otherworldly nature knowledge they are 
unable to share the sense that...

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Categories: outhouses, anniversary, anti bullying, anxiety,
Form: Sonnet
Of Spirits, Saints and Spittoons
ON SPIRITS, SAINTS AND SPITTOONS

If you want to love me but find yourself unable
If that is buried deep within you about me
First of all don’t put a setting for me at the table
And for Christ’s sake, just take back the key

This whole palace is your’s...

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Categories: outhouses, angstme, love, me,
Form: Quintain (English)
Two-Ply
Two-ply in roses of yellow and pink,
rolls and sings to the touch
of fingers on its faintly-scented folds,
giving miles of pleasure to soft seats
on hard covers all in the name of
modern convenience which sure is a change
from old catalog sheets housed in quarter-moon
outhouses on homesteads.

Two-ply greets...

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Categories: outhouses, discrimination, home, humorous,
Form: Free verse
Premium Member A Question of Definition
a question of definition

camping?
luxuries au wilderness
juxtaposition
air conditioned lassitude
with untouched raw nature
three piece baths
next to outhouses
wheels rolling through trees
electric lights break
the pristine dark
camp-fire-crackle ambiance
food microwaved
hot running water, lakeside
even the chipmunks shun
mere bread  
for more sumptuous fare....

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Categories: outhouses, crazy,
Form: Free verse

Book: Radiant Verses: A Journey Through Inspiring Poetry