Best Outhouses Poems
No Toilets To FlushWe who remember outhouses
consider flushing toilets
the next thing to heaven.
Yet, we know, in heaven—
no need to search—
they do not exist.
The Apostle Paul said,
“We shall not all sleep,
but we shall all be changed.”
No freckles,
no cowlick,
no twisted bones,
no missing members,
no lack of understanding.
Questions will all be...
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Categories:
outhouses, humor,
Form:
Free verse
Elegy To a Family HouseWhy should I remain a family house
If I am dilapidated, shattered and tattered
In this summer of old age.
Why should I remain a family house
If the house garden bears a barren look
Tearing away its leaves and flowers.
Why should I remain a family house
If the birds do...
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Categories:
outhouses, family,
Form:
Elegy
Whistling In the Dark(A Rave By A Poet)
Remember when you were a child?
Adults seemed then to be in control,
Almost like Gods, with special powers
That almost always knew
When you'd been up to mischief.
‘Playing with matches again Brian? '
What a childish view...
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Categories:
outhouses, childhood, education, fun, games,
Form:
Blank verse
Two-PlyTwo-ply in roses of yellow and pink
rolls and sings to the touch
of fingers on its faintly-scented folds,
giving miles of pleasure to soft seats
on hard covers all in the name of
modern convenience which is a change
from old catalog sheets housed in
quarter-moon...
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Categories:
outhouses, humor, humorous,
Form:
Prose
Elegy To a Family House-WinWhy should you remain a family house
If you are dilapidated, shattered and tattered
In this summer of old age.
Why should you remain a family house
If the house garden bears a barren look
Tearing away its leaves and flowers.
Why should you remain a family house
If the birds do...
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Categories:
outhouses, family,
Form:
Elegy
Good Ol' Triple-Six and the Eternal Drive-By - Part 2- and, anyway, who breaks wind over double-M, a. k. a. Manson,
Marilyn?
I'll give a ride on my razor any day to
The-Second-Prime-of-Nine-to-the-Sixth,
who was around long before CD's, DVD's, MTV, and YOU / MYtube,
spitting out the healing heat, the wound-cleansing apocalypse
of what some denounce as straight from...
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Categories:
outhouses, hope, inspirational, jesus,
Form:
Free verse
My Man-ChildI wish outhouses were still in fashion
For I would be sat in one right now
Away from the hypocrisy that is you
But still close enough
So when I hollered your name
You’d still answer
By God I don’t know how your mother managed...
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Categories:
outhouses, blessing, crazy, funny, how
Form:
Free verse
Halloween TrickstersKids nowadays don't know the fine art of staging Halloween tricks,
(Though they are very adept at fleecing me for candy to get their kicks!)
Tricks we did as kids would no doubt today land us in the slammer,
Causing outrage and rancor by folks for our hides...
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Categories:
outhouses, halloween, humorous,
Form:
Rhyme
Halloween Then and Now
The child I was, so long ago
Knew not of Halloween.
The sweet treats that are now bestowed
By me were never seen.
The preacher at our church denounced
Halloween as evil.
Celebrating it, he said, was
Honoring the devil.
Of course there always were the teens
Who parked buggies on barns
And tipped...
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Categories:
outhouses, childhood, funny, nostalgia, me,
Form:
Ballad
The Outhouse MarketA flea market called the outhouse market
is located just outside of York Town.
And an arrow sign nailed to an old tree
points you to the best flea market around.
Cause it's hidden behind some outhouses
folks need to look for it, it's hard to find.
And yet, it has...
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Categories:
outhouses, city, confusion, fantasy, feelings,
Form:
Quatrain
The Rembrandt of the Great MidwestClyde Pucelli was known as The Rembrandt of The Great Midwest!
He was an itinerant painter, esteemed as one of the best!
With his brushes and well-blended oils he'd render a masterpiece;
His fame spread since he specialized in hues of white and cerise.
He traveled in an old...
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Categories:
outhouses, art, humorous,
Form:
Rhyme
Rainy Day SonnetRainy Day Sonnet.
It is so quiet here in my village when it is raining
dogs in outhouses are overtaken by melancholia.
It appears so useless to bark and their dream might
be of an otherworldly nature knowledge they are
unable to share the sense that...
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Categories:
outhouses, anniversary, anti bullying, anxiety,
Form:
Sonnet
Of Spirits, Saints and SpittoonsON SPIRITS, SAINTS AND SPITTOONS
If you want to love me but find yourself unable
If that is buried deep within you about me
First of all don’t put a setting for me at the table
And for Christ’s sake, just take back the key
This whole palace is your’s...
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Categories:
outhouses, angstme, love, me,
Form:
Quintain (English)
Two-PlyTwo-ply in roses of yellow and pink,
rolls and sings to the touch
of fingers on its faintly-scented folds,
giving miles of pleasure to soft seats
on hard covers all in the name of
modern convenience which sure is a change
from old catalog sheets housed in quarter-moon
outhouses on homesteads.
Two-ply greets...
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Categories:
outhouses, discrimination, home, humorous,
Form:
Free verse
A Question of Definitiona question of definition
camping?
luxuries au wilderness
juxtaposition
air conditioned lassitude
with untouched raw nature
three piece baths
next to outhouses
wheels rolling through trees
electric lights break
the pristine dark
camp-fire-crackle ambiance
food microwaved
hot running water, lakeside
even the chipmunks shun
mere bread
for more sumptuous fare....
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Categories:
outhouses, crazy,
Form:
Free verse