Best Craps Poems
Vegas Craps
Showgirls dance at noon;
Over Sin City hangs the moon,
On the strip I cruise.
One-armed bandits shine;
Wayne Newton lights up the night,
Flying Elvis' dine
Tigers start to leap;
Sun shines as tired gamblers sleep,
Buffet patrons eat.
Call girls dream of fun;
Neon fuels the Vegas sun,
Hustler's on the run.
Black Jack Baby hides,
Bugsy Siegel's paradise,
Cheaters pay the price.
Rat Pack waves goodbye;
Morning drained our pockets dry,
On the road I cry.
So we’re coming out?
Here’s my bet on the pass line.
I’m going to shoot?
That’s just fine with me!
Luck be a lady tonight!
Let me come out right!
I need a seven
I could use an eleven
Either one is good.
Okay, here we go!
Baby needs a pair of shoes!
Seven-eleven!
What do we have here?
Three and a four makes seven
Oh, Hallelujah!
Baby, let it ride
Seven-eleven we want!
Here we go again!
Oh, so we have nine
That was a centerfield roll!
Let’s try to make it.
We will need some odds.
Ten times odds at this table?
One hundred behind.
Fifty-four across
We can use a nice long roll!
Baby, please be nice!
We must get them hot
Get winners for all we’ve got
Here we go again.
A nine will be fine
How did Jesse James get shot?
With a forty-five!
Tell me what it is
Another seven so soon?
It’s all down the drain!
Forget it today
Luck has been a bad lady
It’s time we go home!
The dice become unfriendly as I watch my slimming pile.
The seven’s coming up again, but doesn’t make me smile.
I’ve put most of my income on the ‘Don’t Pass’ line, you see
But the shooter was a devil and his points were killing me.
-
He makes his numbers often, and I’m in such a fright
The guy’s so hot that I believe he’ll hold those dice all night
But I am not a pussycat, I know he’s gotta lose,
And so, I am persisting, and the ‘Don’t Pass’ line I choose.
-
I’m following the Martingale, a system meant to win
You just keep doubling bet-wise, even if your pile is thin.
Well, my stake is going fast, but I stick to the system
I bet the last chips in my pile, and for good luck, I kissed ‘em.
-
So punters all, take note of this, and you will be a winner
Never, never double bets, it makes your pile much thinner.
I now have a point.
I’m taking my odds.
I’m making place bets.
Cover the table.
I’m looking to win.
Rolling the bones
to get my point.
Go lady luck!
Be nice to me.
What the heck?
Seven out!
There it goes.
I lose.
No bread.
Broke.
No two skies are ever exactly the same --
certainly not yours and mine – yet we
inclement, and clear, at times in a quite
agreeable way. No two rises and sets are ever
less thrilling, for the sun cycles in an infinite
universe, never in the same solar place twice --
man riding the claims of larger game victory,
while tossing in knowledge of his little, dotted
square dice --