Richard Lamoureux Poet Rhyme

Special Taste

Do not confuse 
my compliance 
with agreement.
My quiet is not 
for your appeasement.
I’m trying to survive,
while knowing 
my suffering 
makes you feel alive.
I’ll never understand,
how pushing me down,
causes you to thrive.

Is there 
a special taste
in my fear?
A satiation 
of your thirst 
that is quenched 
by a tear?
How do you 
see yourself 
when you 
look in a mirror?
Would you 
cease to exist
if I wasn’t here?

I am
sucked up
by your need.
Your “Love me
love me” creed!
Your soul hole
is to big to feed.
You’re a human parasite,
or a deep rooted weed.
 How much more,
will you cause me to bleed?

I am child
You hold 
all the power.
An imposing figure
like a clock tower.
I am held 
in your tick talk grip,
hour after hour.
As I grow quieter,
you become
louder and louder.

Now I make
my great escape.
My own new world
a different landscape.
The old me 
hung out to dry,
like a freshly
cleaned sheet draped
I  become,
my own Super Hero,
with a brand new cape.

Without you,
my strength grew.
I did not allow you,
to determine who
I should be,
or what I am supposed to do.
That part of my life
is finally through.

All the lies you 
forced fed me,
none of them were real.
I didn’t know then
how I should feel.
You somehow 
convinced me
you were a big deal.
Now you hold no sway
and little appeal.
I got off of
your mind controlled
hamster wheel!
My life’s now my own,
I stopped the steal.

I am reading Edith Egler’s book “The Gift”
It caused me to contemplate abuse at the
hands of my father. I wrote another piece 
titled Eddy in which I tried to understand what 
shaped who he became. I am not angry with 
him anymore. He passed away over 20 years
ago. I must admit it was an important part of
my family healing.

♡Like0

Share Poem

---

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

Anne E Sangster - K July 26, 2021 at 6:14 PM Hi Richard, This is why we write. It helps us to move past things in our past that hurt us. As a child I too experienced emotional abuse. An excellent poem! Cheers my friend Richard Lamoureux July 27, 2021 at 6:22 AM Thanks Anne, so sorry to hear you also have dealt with Childhood abuse. Hugs Rick.

Timothy Hicks April 6, 2021 at 9:14 AM “Would you cease to exist if I wasn’t here.” ... this was deep, Rick. You’d think some just exist to put others down ... an existence tied to another’s pain. I don’t know what it’s like to have an abusive parent... but you opened the door for me to take a peak, and I didn’t like what I saw. Good therapy to air out those emotions. Commendable. Richard Lamoureux April 25, 2021 at 7:55 AM Read my poem “Eddie” it provides context. None of us is ever one thing. Thanks for commenting.

Malabika Ray Choudhury April 2, 2021 at 9:33 AM Powerful and outstanding! The way you rhyme your poems, is astonishing - feels so natural! And the message? Although I didn't have the same kind of experiences, I have seen abuses - it could be many different ways! Thank you for writing this incredible poem - this is what we write for! BW ~ Mala Richard Lamoureux April 2, 2021 at 2:22 PM Hi Mala, I appreciate your sensitive response. Blessings Richard.

Andrea Dietrich March 29, 2021 at 5:33 PM You have some very good and powerful imagery in this poem, Richard, and I recall in the past your speaking of the abusive father. I know you think my childhood was idyllic, but we had many troubled times (we were like a dysfunctional Brady Bunch family), and it was my closeness with my sisters that got me through. I hope you at least had a sibling or two to depend on! Richard Lamoureux March 30, 2021 at 7:09 AM I am close to my sister, we were a year apart in school. Your poetry is so good you convinced me it was idyllic *lol*.

Joanna Daniel March 29, 2021 at 3:07 AM Oh! By God's grace, you have come out of it all the more stronger, Richard:) glad that you can forgive him now... Richard Lamoureux March 29, 2021 at 6:10 AM Thanks Jo, holding onto sadness and pain never heals us. True forgiveness is impossible without allowing God to flow through us and wash it away.

Eileen Manassian March 27, 2021 at 6:23 AM Sending hugs your way Richard Lamoureux March 27, 2021 at 7:14 AM Hugs back to you. ;0)

Janice Canerdy March 26, 2021 at 12:37 PM Powerful description of rising above abuse that COULD have been permanently devastating, Richard. Janice Richard Lamoureux March 26, 2021 at 2:31 PM Thanks janice. Hugs Rick

Anne-Lise Andresen March 24, 2021 at 5:35 AM - I have a warm heart, Richard ... but, I do not know if I could forgive such actions against a defenseless child - Powerful and a deeply moving poem - hugs // Anne-Lise :) Richard Lamoureux March 24, 2021 at 2:00 PM If you read my Poem “Eddy” it might provide perspective. Thanks for your kind comment. Hugs Rick.

Paulette Calasibetta March 23, 2021 at 5:45 PM Hi Richard, Abuse either destroys the spirit or becomes the catalyst to rise, to grow and love. You have created a moving poem, where your reality has been woven into a prosaic memory. Take Care, Paulette Richard Lamoureux March 23, 2021 at 9:33 PM What a lovely response Paulette. Blessings Rick.

Darlene De Beaulieu March 22, 2021 at 12:37 PM Hello Richard, so sorry to read that you were abused by your father growing up. You had a rough childhood. So did I. My father abused me with words by always putting me down. One day he backed me into a corner and was going to punch me in the face. I said "Go ahead kill meinstead!" The he stopped. Enjoy your day my friend. Darlene De Beaulieu March 23, 2021 at 11:03 AM Richard, thank you for these kind words. Blessings Richard. Richard Lamoureux March 22, 2021 at 9:03 PM So sorry for you as well. I am glad that you also survived a difficult start. Blessings Rick.

Alexis Y. March 22, 2021 at 5:49 AM WoW! Richard, Your title had nothing to do with what I thought it did. Reading that book caused you to write a good. I read“A Child Called It; it was a sad( heartbreaking) yet well-written book on child abuse.You have penned such a powerful write. Child abuse can leave such devastating scars. I’m so glad you overcame what you endured and turned out to be a remarkable person-Alexis Richard Lamoureux March 22, 2021 at 6:52 AM But for the Grace of God. I have much to be thankful for. Thanks for your thoughtful and empathic response. Hugs Rick.

Sara Kendrick March 22, 2021 at 3:13 AM Richard, I am glad that you survived and learned what you experienced was abuse and you have worked through it and are now a better person. Your father was probably abused as well and it probably goes back generation after generation but it could have only been him but from my experience in life it is a generational thing. Thanks for dropping by. Sara Richard Lamoureux March 22, 2021 at 6:55 AM Hi Sarah you are wise, indeed he was. In 2017 I wrote my poem “Eddy”. It tells his story and helped me view him with compassionate eyes. Thanks for your heartfelt words. Hugs Rick.

Tom Cunningham March 22, 2021 at 1:26 AM Such a powerful write Richard, im sure bringing it out into the open brings closure, many bottle up their past and it eats away at them. Hope you have a great week. Tom Richard Lamoureux March 22, 2021 at 6:57 AM Yes, keeping emotions bottled up is not healthy. Those of us who write are fortunate to have this outlet to process our emotions.

Carole Duet March 22, 2021 at 12:09 AM Great poem, Richard...so meaningful and your explanation so poignant. I'm glad you got out of that situation in such good shape and healed from the turmoil it must have caused. Many a person can relate to this poem and could benefit from reading it. Love...Carole :D Richard Lamoureux March 22, 2021 at 6:58 AM You are kind Carole. Blessings and a big hug.

Judy Ball March 21, 2021 at 10:09 PM A fine write that many parents should have to read just to show them who and what they are and what they are doing to an innocent child. I was deathly afraid of my mom because since she was beaten as a child she beat me and my sister thinking she was doing the right thing. I finally realized after growing up that she wasn't really a bad person just not a smart person. I think her beatings affected her mentally. Good job here my friend. God Bless, JB Richard Lamoureux March 21, 2021 at 10:14 PM https://www.poetrysoup.com/poem/eddy_879306 My poem Eddy might provide context. Sorry for your experience. It is good you have compassion for your mom. Hugs Rick. Richard Lamoureux March 21, 2021 at 10:12 PM Thanks for your blessing Judy.

L Milton Hankins March 21, 2021 at 5:01 PM Thanks, Richard, for sharing this. This poem is very compelling...powerful! Thanks for the explanatory note, too. It was helpful. Richard Lamoureux March 21, 2021 at 5:27 PM Thanks my friend. ;0)

Michelle Faulkner March 21, 2021 at 3:55 PM Wow, your verse here so gripping, I love how the flow of the rhymes feels like a river reaching the sea, growing stronger and wider, and free (and that was unplanned, just happened!) I think my favorite line is 'I became my own Super Hero, with a brand new cape' - it is so liberating to finally become our true selves! Richard Lamoureux March 21, 2021 at 5:26 PM What a uplifting response. Thanks and a big hug. ;0)

David Mchattie March 21, 2021 at 3:21 PM The Parents of the 20's and 30's produced some interesting children. Poverty has a way of making men cruel. As always. Well penned my friend. Getting rid of excess baggage is never easy. Have a great day. Richard Lamoureux March 21, 2021 at 3:27 PM My dad was born in the forties but prosperous times didn’t temper his cruelty. Richard Lamoureux March 21, 2021 at 3:24 PM Thanks David. Is your comic strip back?

Carolyn Devonshire March 21, 2021 at 2:30 PM I don't see how putting someone down can ever make a person feel better, Richard. It sounds like you had a difficult childhood. Glad you "stopped the steal." Best wishes, Carolyn Richard Lamoureux March 21, 2021 at 3:03 PM Thanks Carolyn. Since leaving home in my teens, life has been blessed.