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Poop- There It Is

No pushing or breaking of water It was a c-section that brought her But this is about What wouldn’t come out A poop just as big as my daughter! Perhaps it was pain medication To clog up and cause constipation Nurse said I must show They won’t let me go Till poop- there it is- defecation! Determined, I pulled an all-nighter. That turd was a hell of a fighter. And then with my tush, Turns out I did push! And poof! I was seven pounds lighter!

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Harveen Kaur

Date: 9/12/2023 8:55:00 AM

Hilarious!

Jessica Wheeler
Date: 9/12/2023 9:06:00 AM

Thank ya! :)

The Situation

Date: 8/23/2023 6:43:00 PM

nasty nasty humor yet entertaining.

Jessica Wheeler
Date: 9/12/2023 9:07:00 AM

Thank you! :)

Randy Freie

Date: 8/23/2023 6:09:00 PM

OMG! I almost pooped my pants from this one. I guess laughter is one way of keeping regular. Thanks for the chuckle Jessica, what a gas!

Jessica Wheeler
Date: 9/12/2023 9:06:00 AM

LOL thank you! It is indeed haha

James Inman

Date: 8/19/2023 9:17:00 AM

Very humorous. Next one take the enema.

Jessica Wheeler
Date: 9/12/2023 9:06:00 AM

Noted. lol

Brian K. Bilverstone

Date: 8/17/2023 12:34:00 PM

Right, so, I'm a bloke, so of course I've never given birth - to a human. I have however had some pretty desperate lavatorial battles with what I thought was solid rock, so on that level I can relate! Excellent humour and razor-sharp observation. Great poem!

Jessica Wheeler
Date: 8/18/2023 10:18:00 PM

Hahah well, basically the same thing! Thanks for the laugh, Brian! :)

Linda Alice Fowler

Date: 7/15/2023 11:41:00 AM

I'm still laughing Jessica. You did this contest well - Congrats! :)

Jessica Wheeler
Date: 8/18/2023 10:17:00 PM

Thank you so much, Linda! :)

Robert Johnson

Date: 7/7/2023 6:52:00 AM

Oh My Goodness. Oh, I can hardly type. I'm laughing so hard. So clever.

Jessica Wheeler
Date: 7/7/2023 7:53:00 AM

Leslie, thank you! You made my morning! :)

Andrea Dietrich

Date: 7/6/2023 10:41:00 PM

Smart one! As if having the baby is not enough. Congrats

Jessica Wheeler
Date: 7/7/2023 7:53:00 AM

Thank you so much, Andrea!

Terry Flood

Date: 7/6/2023 3:04:00 PM

So, in effect… you had twins. Always the same… one helps around the house and does well at school… the other just sits around stinking up the place. A smashing write, Jessica. Congrats on you win. Terry

Jessica Wheeler
Date: 7/7/2023 7:52:00 AM

Hahaha Terry your comment cracked me up. The little stinker! Thanks so much!

David Fisher

Date: 7/4/2023 5:20:00 PM

This one is so clever from the title down to the bowl, lol.

Jessica Wheeler
Date: 7/4/2023 7:42:00 PM

Thanks so much, David!

Jan Allison

Date: 7/4/2023 4:17:00 PM

Jessica your c section poem theme was sheer genius lol. I really had a giggle at this one, thanks for supporting the contest:-) Many congrats on your win:-) hugs Jan xx

Jessica Wheeler
Date: 7/4/2023 7:40:00 PM

Thank you so much, Jan! Thank you for hosting such a fun contest! I’m thrilled you enjoyed it, and appreciate your kind words and sense of humor.:) Xoxo