Pale Shelter
encompassed in the womb
through darkness, i felt touch
ethereal strums from fingers
against my unborn flesh
as a melody soothed
in rhythmic pulses
from your heart
...it's the only time i felt loved
you gave me life
taught me to walk
two steps shy of death's door
i crawled in the shadows, afraid
cowering in the algidity of a touch
i ached for in outstretch motions
as tiny fingers reached upward
reverting back with blades
that scribbled scores of depth
while trying to feel anything but anguish
...i wished to be unborn
you fed me
ugliness through affliction
of dispassionate glares
as you made me
unlove myself
starve myself
until i was but an empty shell
of what i could have been
...i will never be good enough
you gave me a house
filled with treasures, untouched
clothed me in ridicule
made me learn to crawl
on weakened knees
while filling buckets
with my tears, my echoes
shuddering down halls
where i curled up
and died, unheard
...you killed me inside
November 12, 2019
Pale Shelter Poetry Contest
Sponsored by John Hamilton
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