Jan Allison Poet Limerick

Notes About The Poem

On a Roll For Contest

I nestled my bottom on the seat
Of the toilet - I’m being discrete
I finished my job
Now need a lynch mob
It’s a good thing I didn’t excrete!

There’s no paper left in the loo
My language is turning quite blue
If you use the last sheet
Will you kindly replete
Or there’ll be a hullabaloo

Contest -I’m so annoyed
Sponsor Mary Oliver Rotman

01 08 15

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James Fraser October 10, 2015 at 1:33 PM So so annoying is this, also is leaving the toilet roll beside the basin, double grrrrrr! for that - hugs//James xx Jan Allison October 10, 2015 at 2:17 PM LOL :-) hugs Jan xx

Sara Kendrick August 13, 2015 at 3:00 PM Awesome work !! No wonder it is in the winners’ list. Congrats..Sara Jan Allison August 13, 2015 at 3:09 PM Thanks Sara:-) hugs jan xx

Edward Ebbs August 11, 2015 at 11:12 PM LOL hopefully it's a full bathroom and the shower is right next to you! Congrats! :) Jan Allison August 12, 2015 at 2:56 AM ha ha ha Ed - good thought! Hugs jan xx

Tim Ryerson August 11, 2015 at 6:16 AM BIG congrats my friend! The title is sheer GENIUS...One point I'd like to make though, why aren't MEN allowed to complain when their wives fail to put the toilet seat back UP? It's an outrage I tell you! Gender discrimination at its worst... Jan Allison August 11, 2015 at 11:44 AM ha ha ha Tim - i wrote a poem when i first started posting called something like 'ode de loo' I do like to have fun with my titles:-) hugs jan xx

Dr. Upma A. Sharma August 10, 2015 at 1:06 AM Congrats on ur awesome winning poem Jan! Great work! Jan Allison August 10, 2015 at 4:15 AM Thanks Dr Sharma:-) hugs Jan xx

John Lawless August 9, 2015 at 8:16 AM Sorry Jan, I was in a rush to post a poem. Isn't one of the ten great laws of spirituality "to insure a spiritually uplifting experience for those to follow......put a new roll of TP on the roll." I think it comes right after the one about refilling the ice cube tray. Jan Allison August 9, 2015 at 8:30 AM Wise words indeed John - maybe there should have been an 11th commandment written!:-) Hugs Jan xx

Eve Roper August 8, 2015 at 10:37 PM Back to congratulate you on your win. Hugs Eve Jan Allison August 9, 2015 at 1:16 AM Thanks so much for all your support my friend:-) hugs Jan xx

Skat A August 8, 2015 at 9:59 PM Jan, Congrats in Mary's contest. **SKAT** Jan Allison August 9, 2015 at 1:16 AM Thanks so much Skat:-) hugs Jan xx

Etienne Lariviere August 6, 2015 at 3:34 PM voila today you have made me cry for the poor, and now you make me laugh at myself! Bravo Jan Allison August 6, 2015 at 4:09 PM Thank you so much for your support my friend:-) hugs jan xx

David Fisher August 3, 2015 at 8:19 PM You flushed down, I mean 'out' a winner here, Jan. Good luck in the contest! Jan Allison August 4, 2015 at 2:55 AM LOL David - thanks for dropping by:-) hugs Jan xx

Shane Cooper August 3, 2015 at 7:24 PM Little Jan Me thinkest that my lady fair is spending a lot of time in the Outhouse these days!!! Love the poem!! Put a smile on my dial Love Shane xxx Jan Allison August 4, 2015 at 2:54 AM I am trying to get away from writing poems about poop but this really is a pet hate lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Olive Eloisa Guillermo - Fraser August 3, 2015 at 2:51 AM Jan, hilarious!hahah! the title is two thumbs up for me! hugs!xx~Olive Eloisa =') Jan Allison August 3, 2015 at 3:42 AM Thanks Olive - I do like to have fun with the titles too:-) hugs jan xx

Paul Callus August 2, 2015 at 10:55 AM Two complimentary and humorous limericks which as usual elicit more than a smile! Love the title. ~ Hugs // paul Jan Allison August 2, 2015 at 10:58 AM I need to stop the poop poems Paul but sometimes I have to go with the flow lol:-) hugs jan xx

Kp Nunez August 2, 2015 at 10:02 AM lol! That's why I always check for your humorous writes! This is tops! hahahah...You sure are on a roll...! huggs Jan Allison August 2, 2015 at 10:04 AM LOL Kim:-) As long as I can brighten someone's day that is the main thing:-) hugs Jan xx

James Peranteau August 1, 2015 at 10:56 PM Comical indeed dear poet ! "on a roll"....love it ! Good luck..have a great upcoming week Jan....much love, james Jan Allison August 2, 2015 at 4:41 AM Thanks James and I am still laughing at your mail - very funny:-) hugs Jan xx

Anna Hopper August 1, 2015 at 9:56 PM Laughing out loud! Excellent job, as always! Enjoyed your humor this evening! Great pen. Good luck! Jan Allison August 2, 2015 at 4:40 AM Thanks so much Anna:-) Hugs Jan xx

Afolabi Muideen August 1, 2015 at 7:09 PM Lol!!!,I love this piece, It so much funny, this read like a winner to me...........A.M. Jan Allison August 1, 2015 at 7:12 PM Thanks so much Afolabi:-) hugs jan xx

Joseph May August 1, 2015 at 4:05 PM Love the title of this humorous write....good luck in the contest...hugs Jan Allison August 1, 2015 at 4:19 PM Thanks Joseph I do appreciate your support:-) hugs Jan xx

Anne-Lise Andresen August 1, 2015 at 1:35 PM - I love your "smile" ....... your humor !!!! - You are "true" and straight to the point !!! - Makes me always laugh :) - I wish you good luck in the contest! - Hope all is well with you - (big waves, waiting for me - now in august) - (7) - hugs // Anne-Lise :) Anne-Lise Andresen August 1, 2015 at 1:50 PM So true !!! ...... Absolutely free :))) Jan Allison August 1, 2015 at 1:45 PM Thanks Anne Lise - my first poem was called 'Splendid Isolation' - written after my husband's cancer surgery but when I posted my first poem here I posted a humourous one - my intention is to write with humour whenever I can:-) There is always someone going through tougher times than we are and a smile costs nothing:-( hugs jan xx

Thomas Martin August 1, 2015 at 1:21 PM ROFL! Great, Jan! Jan Allison August 1, 2015 at 1:27 PM Thanks Thomas - I am the self confessed Queen of poop poetry and wear my crown with pride:-) hugs Jan xx

Andrea Dietrich August 1, 2015 at 1:15 PM on a roll, GREAT word play. GREAT humor, as always, jan. YOU ROCK!! Jan Allison August 1, 2015 at 1:19 PM you know me Andrea - I can't resist the opportunity to write pooh poetry and this REALLY does irritate me - not so bad at home but at work they have these horrid massive rolls and the end of the paper gets torn off and you can't get your hands on the next sheet - arrgghhh - I always take some in with me in my bag now lol

Demetrios Trifiatis August 1, 2015 at 12:58 PM The problem with Limericks is that they turn up to the least expected places, Jan! ...Riotous! Will the contest take place in public view? Ha-ha! Jan Allison August 1, 2015 at 1:03 PM ha ha ha I hope Mary will judge it behind closed doors:-) hugs Jan xx

Nette Onclaud August 1, 2015 at 12:45 PM *laughing*.. you never run out of poop poems, jan.. another fun poem.. huggs Jan Allison August 1, 2015 at 12:47 PM I have to go with the flow Nette - maybe I could write a book of pooh poetry lol:-) hugs Jan xx

Eve Roper August 1, 2015 at 12:38 PM Hahaha... oh your poems are so wonderful and creative a 10++++ Hugs dear friend Eve Jan Allison August 1, 2015 at 12:41 PM No Eve they are simply a load of pooh - but who cares lol :-) hugs Jan xx

Bill Lindsay August 1, 2015 at 11:35 AM Don't know where you'll finish in the contest; but I'm guessing No.1 or No.2 ;) Jan Allison August 1, 2015 at 11:40 AM ha ha ha ... Guess if I get a podium placement I will be flushed with success:-) Hugs Jan xx

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