Notes About The Poem

 

This poem was written for Joseph May's Four lines from any song poetry contest.

To write a poem using 4 lines from one or multiple songs with one of them being the refrain.

I wanted to challenge myself and use 4 lines from one song and also to make it rhyme.

It is a fictional poem.

Each line is 8 syllables, checked via www.howmanysyllables.com.

I used the song below, which may not be very well knows, but I like the song and wanted to do a less popular one.  

Great idea for a contest and was enjoyable to write for.

 

I blame you for the moonlit sky

"I blame you for the moonlit sky,"
in its grandeur our souls would fly.
We were devoted just like stars,
wrote about it in our memoirs.

But your love changed then wonder why
I blame you for the moonlit sky?
"In the rush of the race" for dawn,
you vanished to leave my heart torn.

"Don't blame this sleeping satellite,"
like me it's silent at twilight.
I blame you for the moonlit sky -
curse the night when you said goodbye.

"Did we fly to the moon too soon?"
Or did my dance not match your tune?
Now that stardust tears have run dry,
I blame you for the moonlit sky.

Song choice: Tasmin Archer - Sleeping Satellite

Lyrics used:
"I blame you for the moonlit sky."
"In the rush of the race"
"Don't blame this sleeping satellite."
"Did we fly to the moon too soon?"
Copyright © | Year Posted 2024

Poem

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Scott Avatar
February 13, 2024 at 4:11 AM
I do love this song! Now my ear-worm for today :))
May Avatar
February 11, 2024 at 4:25 AM
'The dance and the tune' might have been out of sync, Very nicely penned Silent, Congrats on your win
Beaufort Avatar
February 3, 2024 at 10:21 AM
It's a common theme in song to describe lost love, but your poem is structured so perfectly! As you point out in your own words and lyrics, it's a mismatch or rush that leads to eventual trouble in paradise. Sad it is and we know it happens very often. I've often said how impressed I am with the Hallmark Channel since the screenplay takes time for the relationships to gel. We have to have a lot of patience. Hard to do when attracted to someone.
Hind Avatar
January 31, 2024 at 2:12 PM
Wow- this is truly beautiful. A powerful message of longing for someone.
Proxenos Avatar
January 31, 2024 at 3:29 AM
Creatively and having not chosen such a very well known song, you confidently, as always rising to a challenge, using the four lines rquired for the contest from one song only, resulted in entering a magnificent poem for Joseph's contest. Lots of luck SO with this brilliant poem hugs and blessings Jennifer
Dietrich Avatar
January 30, 2024 at 1:30 PM
Really great use of those song lines, Silent One. I see you chose them all from one song. I did lines from various Taylor Swift songs. Anyway, this was amazing
Spilchuk Avatar
January 30, 2024 at 7:28 AM
Great artistic expression.
Jones Avatar
January 29, 2024 at 11:56 PM
This is a gem and well executed idea for the contest! I love the imagery and how well you put it together! Best wishes!
George Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 7:18 PM
This is such a sweet parody (?) I don't think I can call it a parody. Surely an ingenious creation....! You are so good in all forms. "Did we fly to the moon too soon?" Or did my dance not match your tune?" Love this question. Silent One, I admire your poetic skills. Glad I get many chances to read great poetry here. All the Best dear poet friend .
Hamilton Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 2:10 PM
Pretty clever SO rhymes very well you got a winner here hugs Shadow
Goldsmith Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 10:43 AM
WOW!!! What a wonderful rhyme write from a song. I do not know this song. Good Luck but A Winner To Me.... Have a wonderful day/week................
Rodrigues Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 10:35 AM
Love this Quatern! Your thoughts evolve from love to heartbreak to questions and resolve. Love the refrain and especially verse 3, the sleeping satellite, unique! Keep writing and we’ll keep reading <3
Sharma  Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 10:04 AM
This is such a heartfelt and palpable write dear Silent One.. The emotions reflected here are aching and doleful, yet, you've carved your words with so much elegance and mellifluous essence whilst also maintaining a rhyming flow! The questioning about how everything seemed perfect and if it was only meant to turn in a forlorn history, ahh, that's really evocative.. "Or did my dance not match your tune? Now that stardust tears have run dry", "silent at twilight" Wow, your wordplay is impeccable
Sharma  Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 10:05 AM
Sending many best wishes for the contest, I absolutely loved reading this and how creatively you've crafted every line..
Empress Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 6:24 AM
Dear silent one, well i missed reading your poems, whether fictional or not they are always evocative and soulful and hits deep and leaves us readers pondering and feeling the depth of your words, i actually dont know this song but this inspired me to now go listen to it. Although sometimes you and i have very different taste in music. Anyhow i love that line, “ i blame you for the moonlit sky” yes blame all but not myself is my motto, just kidding! That is a really soul hitting line really!
Empress Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 6:25 AM
“Did we fly to the moon soon” sometimes some relationships in my past makes me feel this way: theres this song “ blind “ by lifehouse, is one of them that speaks to my soul and i thought of that as i read this! I always enjoy reading your work. And rhymes are just your thing. You speak evn in rhymes. Best wishes for the contest. I think this will do well its brilliant
Pandit Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 5:42 AM
A bit forlorn, yet wonderfully romantic write, my friend. Words seamlessly woven in the theme of the song and this poetic form. Splendidly articulated, as always, SO.
Marine Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 5:18 AM
A friend sent this quote to me this morning. "You have to resurrect the deep pain within you and give it a place to live that's not within your body. Let it live in art. Let it live in writing. Let it live in music. Let it be devoured by building brighter connections. Your body is not a coffin for pain to be buried in. Put it somewhere else." This" fictional "poem, touched a few raw nerves, buried, now resurrected. Healing the past means working on one's healing. Warm wishes for the contest!
Bell Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 4:23 AM
I like the flow. I could change your four lines around for the contest, but I couldn't do the hard work to get to your four lines. Good luck.
Mcintosh Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 4:05 AM
Brilliant. Just love this and its sure to win. God bless you my friend. You're an amazing writer/poet. love, Gina
Rolland Avatar
January 28, 2024 at 3:45 AM
beautiful and original "exercice", so enjoyable ths sunday, thanks poet
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