Deciphering the Ease of Falling

My centre of gravity shifts It's a theory I'm contemplating whilst leaning on a bannister I'm perfectly safe, not about to topple over My feet are steady I need to work on my balance point What tips me over All the work tasks aren't daunting me Socially I'm breezing my way through small talk Yet, yesterday happened It's self worth, I know that's what it is Dangerously low with no reserves I'm not even short on external validation It's just the drip feed has to be spot on I of course have no clue what I'm talking about This is clutching at straws My overconfident, under confident self Constantly running the alternative narrative Undermining myself Any kind of falseness grabs me by the throat Has me questioning and extrapolating I move in genuine circles, have rock solid friendships I present my real self & ask everyone to deal with it Because I don't want to win anyone over with siren song (there are exceptions - skipping a queue for a club for instance) It's a shame, I'm sure I could be charming if I felt like it I prefer to be real And I love someone who can be real back I've had the displeasure of attending a lot of funerals this year and my tell it straight uncle packed the church and the paths outside - you knew he liked you if he gave you the time of day. There is something special about that It's surely nice to be nice But it's way better to land in the space where you are special and the words mean something Just a bit hard to sustain