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Concerto of Psychosis

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This is based on a real story of how someone dear to me, someone i love experienced psychosis. An individual diagnosed with bipolar disorder can sometimes go through psychosis and during such episodes they experience, delusions, hallucinations and worthlessness. It all varies amongst individuals. But this poem is written based on what Id seen closely and from what my loved one explained. 

I write about these things, to raise awareness. 

We never know what someone is going through. So lets always stay kind.

 

Written for the contest sponsored by Constance La France

“Psychotic hallucinations, whether they are visual or vocal, they address you. They accuse you. They seduce you. They humiliate you. They jeer at you. You interact with them.” Oliver Sacks
This is not an illusive myth, this is my unspoken tale, woven in infernal syllables of sorrow, of how I lost my sanity~ once upon a blood moon, exhausted by the ghosts of my past that kept knocking on my crippled conscience, forcing me to f l e e … find my way to a field of fragrant roses, where the serpentine fangs, flipping pages of ticking psychosis, are but a forgotten dream within a walking nightmare. … I am a restless riot of emotion, whirling within a vicious cycle of deranged demons, listening to the sizzling silence of lily moon, as jade jewels of jinxed midnight~ form a hypnotic choir of celestial fairies, orchestrating a cosmic symphony, to align the cracked constellations between your crestfallen skies and my satanic seas flowing with merciless mantras, summoned by sinister flames. I’ve seen the devil crawl and dance, to the rhythm of my obsidian fears, while whispers of nocturnal shadows echo in refrains from familiar lips, singing about the way I lost the tune of tranquility. They may say I am an uncontrollable maniac, a luscious psycho on the run, if only they knew, I’m lost in a galactic field, astral waltzing, through a realm of musical manifestation; sleeplessly seizing the moment where colors of insomnia unfurled a fiery ambiance, as questions multiplied in abundance, and the only solution to my equation remains within the unhinged abyss of obese obscurity… and I ponder, poetry spoken between two silhouettes swirling in ivory mists~ would it be touched by the sun and stars? Would I then burn in hellish lies, is this now my destined fate etched for an eternity? Who was I before darkness found its throne within my castle of angst? I knew not the gateway to attain periwinkle peace, yet my kin; the blood to my flesh, the iron to my bones, the skin of my ink, heard me plead on my knees, to the almighty above, release me from this reckless cage, unchain me from the churning chamber of uncertainties, let me rise as the Goddess of Lunar, adorn greying horizons with silvery sequined serenity, for I’ve seen the flickering stones of twilight mourn for my illustrated ruins, and I dare not challenge the borders between truth and fiction. So tonight, I surrender to the vexatious creatures, consuming these midnight musings, lurking like tyrannical leeches, trolling through tormented tunnels. But what is light without darkness, strength without weakness? We find ourselves buried deep within a bed of inescapable madness, searching for hope in dungeons disregarded by mere deprivation.

Copyright © | Year Posted 2024




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Date: 8/7/2024 2:08:00 PM
Ink, impressive, congratulations on your win in my contest with this wonderful poem, well done, love the quote too, Constance
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Date: 7/25/2024 4:28:00 AM
The mind is a wondrous thing. Your beautiful poetry touches on its mysteries and its challenges. Thank you for putting such a difficult topic into words. Your kindness is fully blessed.
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Date: 7/17/2024 6:14:00 AM
Intense in emotion and actual horror! What can be scarier than not being able to trust one's own mind? You did a wonderful job relating something you heard second hand although seen first hand. Awareness needs to be raised and this is a Haunting way to let others know the pain and terror of mental illness. Bravo! Xo
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Date: 7/15/2024 2:07:00 PM
I love how your poem opens with a powerful declaration, “This is not an illusive myth, / this is my unspoken tale,” immediately inviting the reader into a deeply personal narrative. The imagery of “infernal syllables of sorrow” and a “blood moon” sets a dark, almost gothic tone that permeates the entire piece. The recurring motifs of celestial bodies—moons, constellations, and stars—contrast the earthly suffering with a cosmic backdrop, enhancing the sense of existential struggle.
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Silent One
Date: 7/15/2024 2:07:00 PM
You have such strong empathy for others to write about something you have not yourself felt.. I can see why it finished top..
Date: 7/15/2024 1:40:00 PM
Congratulations on your win. WOW!!! What a powerful/great ~ write/ending. The mind is a very powerful thing that the devil likes to play with. So sorry for the pain. Have a blessed day writing away.................
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Date: 7/14/2024 6:17:00 AM
the skin of my ink ! That line is awesome!!!
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Date: 7/14/2024 6:15:00 AM
An accurate capture of the so-called disorder! I feel everyone has a bit of bi-polar within us. How else would we be able to create & move forward. I so appreciate your keen eye & its ability to translate what is seen into exquisitely accurate words??
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/14/2024 6:40:00 AM
Awn thank you dear ghairo for reading grateful for your support always so nice to hear from you
Date: 7/13/2024 2:47:00 PM
Definitely not a state anyone wishes to be in. So many emotions were felt from this. Thank you for always being conscious of mental health and using your craft to create awareness. It's a lot to contain and process. Traumas are intense and just like some bad accidents, there is no total recovery. "I am a restless riot of emotion, whirling within a vicious cycle of deranged demons." Blessings Dear, Ink.
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/14/2024 6:41:00 AM
Thank you so very much dear beautiful soul I appreciate your kindness truly
Date: 7/13/2024 12:32:00 PM
Hi Ink, This is wonderfully emotive and depicts the torment of a tortured soul so well. I had two close friends with that hellacious condition and it is God awful to see the angst one goes thru. I hope your friend is doing well now. Blessings to you dear poetess
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/14/2024 6:41:00 AM
Thank you so much dear nancy i appreciate your kindness and understanding of the poem truly very much
Date: 7/11/2024 6:04:00 PM
But what is light without darkness, strength without weakness? this is wonderful and quite philosophical, enjoyed take care poet
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/12/2024 12:16:00 AM
Thank you so much so grateful for your support always
Date: 7/11/2024 10:43:00 AM
Another EPIC penning Empress!!! Wow, this one hits hard!!! Too many great lines to repost here (others have done that most graciously, already). I must say, your sabbatical into the shadows, as of late, have been fraught with delectable darkness and I am eating it up!! Your words always inspire and to behold your talent is truly a pleasure. A TOP finisher no doubt.
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/12/2024 12:18:00 AM
Thank you so much dear edward, for your enthusiastic and supportive comments. Truly grateful
Date: 7/10/2024 9:44:00 AM
"Who was I before darkness found its throne within my castle of angst?"- this is a fitting question. There is a lot that is unknown about mental illness and the suffering the victims go through. Your poem delves into a very complex subject told from the victims perspective. All the best in the contest
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/12/2024 12:27:00 AM
Thank you so much for reading and for your kind and generous feedback. Always appreciate your poetic presence
Date: 7/10/2024 5:58:00 AM
This true story of bipolar disorder is so touching. You have delved deep into the turmoil such people experience with so much sympathy and understanding. Psychosis plunges one into hallucinations dreadful. No one will be able to understand the depth of unrest they face. Most of them suffer from insomnia. They too have periods of sanity when they try to remember- "Who was I before darkness found its throne within my castle of angst?" The mood of resignation at the end is so consoling..."But what is light without darkness, strength without weakness?" This duality of life is the only answer to such unfortunate turns of life. With deep sympathy and compassion you have probed into the malaise such people experience who reside in castles of angst and made to pass through dark tunnels .
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/12/2024 12:28:00 AM
You are truly such a beautiful soul! Thank you so much sweet valsa for all that you are
Date: 7/10/2024 1:27:00 AM
A restless riot of emotion. This phrase hit me deeply. Your talent is great. You express emotions with great verve. Best for a win.
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/12/2024 12:39:00 AM
Thank you so much dear victor always
Date: 7/9/2024 8:00:00 PM
Your poem was like a Vincent van Gogh painting...beautiful yet from the mind of emotional pain...well expressed and good luck
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Date: 7/9/2024 6:38:00 PM
Your poem tells of the terrible trap of mental illness. Research is needed. This is a poem that everyone needs to read to promote understanding . You did two things: wrote a beautiful poem, and provided information about mental illness. Good luck with the contest.
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Edward Wraith
Date: 7/11/2024 10:23:00 AM
Well stated Hilda, I 100% Agree!!
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/9/2024 10:57:00 PM
Awwn dear hilda, always a pleasure to hear from you
Date: 7/9/2024 6:26:00 PM
your writing is so so real, and I love the way you place color to every emotion, make it that much more stark to the mind and heart of me, thank you for sharing this, you enrich my life with your poem INK,
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/9/2024 11:01:00 PM
Sweet rose! You are an angel!
Date: 7/9/2024 3:28:00 PM
Wow that second verse really captures the malevolent side of it with great alliteration , Ink. Oh, periwinkle peace. Where do you come up with all these colorful descriptions. We can really sense the difficulties faced by the one tormented by bipolarism,
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/9/2024 11:02:00 PM
Awwn soul aunt! Thank you haha i didnt want it to be too dark. So glamorized some lines. As i sent this to my sister too and can cause distress.. thank you always for being so supportive
Date: 7/9/2024 11:14:00 AM
How well you describe the mental torture some experience. I don't think it's possible for any of us to truly understand it. As you know my relative is bipolar and has had psychotic episodes, especially when alcohol and/or drugs were thrown into the mix. I saw your comment to your sister. I'm sure she treasures you. Hopefully my brother sees me the same way. We had dinner and spiritual time together last night. It was good
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/9/2024 11:05:00 PM
Thats lovely, you had a nice time with your brother: im sure he sees you that way: but men are not the type to openly express. Yes for individuals goin through psychosis and mania it is never a good idea to use drugs or alcohol it can worsen their condition; thank you for your support truly
Date: 7/9/2024 11:03:00 AM
"my satanic seas flowing with merciless mantras, summoned by sinister flames." -- it is indeed a form of possession. When health is poor, defenses down, the devil seizes opportunity. God knows the battle is with evil and not seemingly helpless individuals. "Who was I before darkness found its throne within my castle of angst?" Son and daughter of God -- you still are. Well exposed. Mental illness is a hell without an exit. A dank funnel without light. Yet God sees and hears our cries~ can love us back.
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/9/2024 11:06:00 PM
Yes dear joe youv said it all so very well: it did seem like possession. And God eventually saves them along with medication. Thank you for your beautiful comment always grateful
Date: 7/9/2024 10:52:00 AM
From your beautiful soul- beautiful words, how kind to write for this person :)
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/12/2024 12:45:00 AM
Thank you beautiful soul always
Date: 7/9/2024 9:40:00 AM
Stunning. Srark. No doubt true for it’s so powerful.i’m faving it for its mastery. Intense ! My great respect for you Empress! Bless you, my hugs, sally
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Date: 7/9/2024 9:36:00 AM
woven in infernal syllables of sorrow, mmmm can already feel the heaviness of this piece… restless riot of emotion, whirling within a vicious cycle of deranged demons, soo connected to this line rn aee .. ! my kin; the blood to my flesh,the iron to my bones, the skin of my ink,heard me plead on my knees, to the almighty above, mm love that line n everything it stands for! . searching for hope in dungeons! Marvelous !this piece is full of strength n resilience n bravery . it is absolutely empowering..
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Date: 7/9/2024 8:50:00 AM
This reads like the opening of a classic horror film, it's easy to imagine the menacing music and rolling mists as the camera makes it's way over moors. Excellent imagery
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/9/2024 8:56:00 AM
Thank you so much dear dd, a bit emotional write for me and it means alot that you felt the dramatization.
Date: 7/9/2024 8:44:00 AM
I could relate to this poem so deep . As I have been through psychosis … you have written and described it so well poetically. Well done .
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The Aura Rhymes
Date: 7/10/2024 2:53:00 AM
Love you too ink empress
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Tom Woody
Date: 7/9/2024 11:14:00 AM
:)
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Ink Empress
Date: 7/9/2024 8:55:00 AM
I know and it is inspired by you, i love you

Book: Reflection on the Important Things