Home » Poems » Andrea Dietrich » Broken Sinking Boat

Broken Sinking Boat

“minus identity . . who am I?” - Unseeking Seeker I am a boat not anchored to the shore. The waves keep crashing me. They’re coming fast and very hard. I hear the ocean’s roar. My stern and bow are breaking. They can’t last. My hull is sinking. If I’d had a name, I can’t recall it. No esteem have I. Who was I, and who am I now? All aim is lost, and as I sink, I see the sky so dark and terrifying even though it’s daytime. Is it nighttime after all? I look around me, and I just don’t know where I begin or end. I feel so small. I’m breaking into pieces on a sea that swallows me and my identity.

Post Comments

Poetrysoup is an environment of encouragement and growth so only provide specific positive comments that indicate what you appreciate about the poem. Negative comments will result your account being banned.

Please Login to post a comment

thriveni c mysore

Date: 7/2/2024 10:00:00 PM

sad but there is so much to it, Congratulations on your win dear poet.

Christina Bowring

Date: 6/29/2024 12:05:00 AM

Dear Andrea, this is a very powerful and moving personification. You have captured the loss of identity, self worth, acknowledgement, so beautifully within all these amazing lines. The quote from US pairs perfectly. The despair of the little boat and its sorrowful plight is so profound. ‘ I look around me and I just don’t know where I begin or end ‘ ‘ I feel so small ‘ such sad lines that illustrates vividly the essence of the whole sonnet. Your ending couplet is truly amazing and impactful to

Andrea Dietrich
Date: 6/29/2024 7:23:00 PM

Thanks so much, Crristina

Christina Bowring
Date: 6/29/2024 12:09:00 AM

the reader who has been greatly touched by the eventual demise of the boat and its identity lost to the sea forever as it’s consumed and becomes one with the sea. Outstanding piece from you. If this is for a contest then good luck. Looks like a winner to me :):)

Susan Lawrence

Date: 6/26/2024 8:35:00 PM

Hi dear Andrea , it’s been so long and I’m happy to be back here reading some poems and writing a few. I’ve missed you and missed your words. This has so much sadness and true despair. I love how descriptive and creative you are. big hugs, Susan :)

Joe Dimino

Date: 6/26/2024 11:08:00 AM

"I feel so small. I’m breaking into pieces on a sea that swallows me and my identity." Wow! Not a a time nor good place to be at... -- a death many people live with from day to day~ day after day a seeming, constant perish of existence. Well said.

Andrea Dietrich
Date: 6/26/2024 12:03:00 PM

thanks, Joe. I had to research what it meant not to have an identity and this is how it felt to me as I studied about it.

Jay Narain

Date: 6/26/2024 10:34:00 AM

A nice poem. Losing self identity is losing oneself. boat personification is touching.

Andrea Dietrich
Date: 6/26/2024 12:04:00 PM

thanks, Jay

Ink Empress

Date: 6/25/2024 11:44:00 PM

Wow this is brilliant! Great personification! I love the idea of boat! And this prompt is very inspiring i want to write for it too. But need time to sit and scribble! Youv nailed it sweet andrea! Its so deeply moving n descriptive! One of my faves from you and i can resonate too! That last line! Just brilliant! Best wishes

Andrea Dietrich
Date: 6/26/2024 8:23:00 AM

thanks, ink. It's actually a sonnet and it was really fun to write. I did not know how to address the topic until the boat idea came to me.

Valsa George

Date: 6/25/2024 9:11:00 PM

The despair is very evident in the protagonist as he plunges into the nadir of hopelessness and finds no way out. A powerful poem. Losing one's sense of identity is losing oneself ! A great entry, dear Andrea. All the Best.

Andrea Dietrich
Date: 6/26/2024 8:23:00 AM

thanks so much, Valsa

Tonye George

Date: 6/25/2024 9:04:00 PM

Powerful lines there Andrea. I could almost feel the sinking. Nice entry for the contest. Best wishes.

Andrea Dietrich
Date: 6/26/2024 8:24:00 AM

thank you

Susan Ashley

Date: 6/25/2024 7:29:00 PM

Dear Andrea, the confusion, suffering and loss of identity of the breaking sinking boat is palpable through your brilliant personification. Great imagery! Warmest wishes.. ~Susan

Andrea Dietrich
Date: 6/26/2024 8:24:00 AM

much appreciated, Susan

Yann Rolland

Date: 6/25/2024 7:12:00 PM

great poetry, great metaphor, we can relate to, enjoyed yann

Andrea Dietrich
Date: 6/26/2024 8:24:00 AM

thanks, Yann