Said the little boy, Sometimes I drop my spoon. Said the little old man, I do that too. The little boy whispered, I wet my pants. I do too, laughed the old man. Said the little boy, I often cry. The old man nodded. So do I. But worst of all, said the boy, it seems Grown-ups don't pay attention to me. And he felt the warmth of a wrinkled old hand. I know what you mean, said the little old man.
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First of all, Papa Smurf didn't create Smurfette. Gargamel did. She was sent in as Gargamel's evil spy with the intention of destroying the Smurf village, but the overwhelming goodness of the Smurf way of life transformed her. And as for the whole gang-bang scenario, it just couldn't happen. Smurfs are asexual. They don't even have reproductive organs under those little white pants. That's what's so illogical, you know, about being a Smurf. What's the point of living if you don't have a dick?
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In Germany, Gunther Burpus remained wedged in his front-door cat flap for two days because passers-by thought he was a piece of installation art. Mr Burpus, 41, of Bremen, was using the flap because he had mislaid his keys. Unfortunately he was spotted by a group of student pranksters who removed his trousers and pants, painted his bottom bright blue, stuck a daffodil between his buttocks and erected a sign saying 'Germany Resurgent, an Essay in Street Art. Please give Generously'. Passers-by assumed Mr Burpus' screams were part of the act and it was only when an old woman complained to the police that he was finally freed. 'I kept calling for help,' he said, 'but people just said 'Very good! Very clever!' and threw coins at me.'
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Boy you really missed the boat. I'll make it simple, so's even fuckin you can understand. Papa God growed us up till we could wear long pants; then he licensed his name to dollar bills, left some car keys on the table, and got the fuck outta town'. Water rushes to his eye-holes. 'Dont be lookin up at no sky for help. Look down here, at us twisted dreamers'. He takes hold of my shoulders, spins me around, and punches me towards the mirror on the wall. 'You're the God. Take responsibility. Exercise your power
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Majority rule is a precious, sacred thing worth dying for. But -- like other precious, sacred things, such as the home and the family -- it's not only worth dying for; it can make you wish you were dead. Imagine if all of life were determined by majority rule. Every meal would be a pizza. Every pair of pants, even those in a Brooks Brothers suit, would be stonewashed denim. Celebrity diet and exercise books would be the only thing on the shelves at the library. And -- since women are a majority of the population -- we'd all be married to Mel Gibson.
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A person who publishes a book appears willfully in public with his pants down.
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I admit to having worn suede and leather pants myself for a while, but you just never feel clean, and it's degenerate, anyway, to wear animal skins.... So I went back to bluejeans after my degenerate period.
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Happy Golf requires goofy pants and a fat ass. You should talk to my neighbor the accountant. Probably a great golfer. Huge ass.
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The human body has two ends on it: one to create with and one to sit on. Sometimes people get their ends reversed. When this happens they need a kick in the seat of the pants.
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There were many times my pants were so thin I could sit on a dime and tell if it was heads or tails.
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As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, O God. - Psalm 42:1
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Hollywood gives a young girl the aura of one giant, self-contained orgy farm, its inhabitants dedicated to crawling into every pair of pants they can find.
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Here I sit broken-hearted, tried to shit but only farted
Later on I took a chance, tried to fart and shat in my pants!
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If a big man with huge muscles kicks in your door and screams 'Everyone get on the ground!!' you then have 3 options. Stand there frozen, get on the ground, or scream back at him; 'Maybe next time when you break into my house, you can knock first! That way, I can put my pants on and wipe my ass!!'
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Psalms 42:1:
For the director of music. A maskil of the Sons of Korah. As the deer pants for streams of water, so my soul pants for you, my God.
(NIV)
To the Chief Musician. A skillful song, or a didactic or reflective poem, of the sons of Korah. AS THE hart pants and longs for the water brooks, so I pant and long for You, O God.
(AMP)
As the hart panteth after the water brooks, so panteth my soul after thee, O God.
(KJV)
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I'm not against machines, as are some people who feel that the computer is leading us back into the jungle...I'm against machines only when the convenience they afford to some people is regarded as more important than the inconvenience they cause to all. In short, I don't think computers should wear the pants or make the decisions. They are deficient in humor, they are not intuitive, and they are not aware of the imponderables. The men who feed them seem to believe that everything is made out of ponderables, which isn't the case. I read a poem once that a computer had written, but didn't care much for it. It seemed to me I could write a better one myself, if I were to put my mind to it.
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The trouble with leaving your feet on the ground is you never get to take your pants off.
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A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on.
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Carpe Diem: Seize the day
Carp e denim: Theres a fish in my pants
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Play 'Strip Risk'. It is the only game in which you can say, 'I've conquered Algeria, now give me your pants!'
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They didn't need men because they had each other, a significant other. It doesn't matter if the cat's in pants or pedal-pushers. I don't think we're supposed to fly solo.
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It felt wonderful doing it. But that's rather like urinating in brown velvet pants. It can feel wonderful, but no one will watch.
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A day without newspapers is like walking around without your pants on.
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A man is in love when something in his head, something in his and chest and something in his pants react to a certain woman.
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The way into a woman's soul is through her eyes and the way into her heart is through her mind.
The way into a man's soul is through his mouth, and the way into his heart is through his pants.
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I was shit scared of cyberspace, so I downloaded in my pants.
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Happiness is like pissing your pants. Everyone can see it but only you can feel its warmth.
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I will not trade pants with others
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Remember that nobody will ever get ahead of you as long as he is kicking you in the seat of the pants.
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The world is nothing but a vast, concerted attempt to catch you with your pants down.
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