Turds Poems | Examples


Premium MemberMouse Turds in the Kitchen

Mouse turds in the kitchen
In the soup and on the pie
Mouse turds in my kitchen sink
I truly want to cry

Mouse turds on my sandwich
Boy that mouse is fast!
Mouse turd trail along the floor
Now the die is cast
Categories: turds, 4th grade, 5th grade,
Form: Rhyme

Premium MemberWisted Turds

My neighbour loves Pete Smockerella,
She boasted that he's a fart smeller,
Oops she got it wrong,
Poor Pete doesn’t pong,
She really meant he’s a smart fella!

10/26/20
Categories: turds, humorous, word play,
Form: Limerick


Premium MemberButterflies and Turds

don't the pretty girls just love a bad boy.. butterflies swarming a turd
Categories: turds, addiction,
Form: Monoku

Premium MemberAn Abundance of Turds

Narratives are fine but use too many words
Economical are limericks with nouns and verbs
Frugal they are
Less wasteful by far
Too much thinking causes an abundance of turds
Categories: turds, poetry,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberContests and Alphabet Turds

I have given contests my very best
only to bruise my ego with unrest
and sometimes hurt within my chest.
I confess to times of being obsessed
with stinking poetry contest-distress.
Feelings from result-upsets are not chronic,
no, they are more geared towards chaotic.

Whenever my imagination goes myopic,
I become a seeker of contest topics
to fast provide fed to my eager muse,
ergo, I have sustained the pain of abuse.
Sad chagrin remains aflame till my joy claims
and strains my reins to make me pen poems again. 
I win only the odd inning to earn minimal grinning.

Contests involve allegiances, politics, grievances,
perspectives, objectives and other human messes.
They are entered by a sphere of genuine peers
who, like me, have need to feel they belong here.
Whether my entries are revered and cheered,
or seemingly smeared and painfully speared,
I would spill no ink if contest stink disappeared.

For me, smelly contests heed the strong need
of my self-centered muse who controls my lead.
Perhaps these words are just stinky alphabet turds
that I merged for a contest my muse used to feed.






... CayCay Jennings
August 10, 2018
Categories: turds, break up, poetry, poets,
Form: Lyric


Premium MemberTurds and Birds

A turd by any other name would still be a turd
A bird by any other name would still be a bird
Birds can fly
Turds still try
Destined for failure and their odor's beyond words
Categories: turds, silly,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberPassionate About Turds

A survival of the fittest is a very famous proverb
As long as good luck, good living and silliness converge
So I've heard
Oh about the third
A personal choice, passionately writing about turds
Categories: turds, fun,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberTurds

Constipation is an extremely shitty word
I don't usually use it, I usually use turd
Must keep it sophisticated
Some might be listening
To this conversation besides the Humorick herd
Categories: turds, humor,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberAn Abundance of Turds

Narratives are fine but use too many words
Economical are limericks with nouns and verbs
Frugal they sure are
Less wasteful by far
Too much thinking causes an abundance of turds
Categories: turds, words,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberTurds and Birds

A turd by any other name would still be a turd
A bird by any other name would still be a bird
Birds can fly
Turds still try
Destined for failure coz their odour is beyond words
Categories: turds, bird,
Form: Limerick

Premium MemberBe Careful When You 'Whist Your Turds'

His teacher said he was a ‘shining wit’
Little Jimmy was SO pleased
But when he told his mum and dad…
They could not be appeased!


(Think spoonerisms)


Jan Allison
8th April 2016
Categories: turds, humorous, word play,
Form: Rhyme
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