The MysticMisfits™ Catalog
“Where the arcane meets the absurd.”
Featured Products:
MysticMist™ Eye Drops – See the truth. Regret immediately.
BoneTone™ Music Box – Wind your way into ancestral trauma.
TimeSteep™ Tea Leaves – Brew your past. Sip your future. Choke on your destiny.
LipHex™ Balm – Kiss like a curse. Moisturizes and mystifies.
Candle of Questionable Intent™ – Smells like lavender. Summons minor deities.
Order now and receive a FREE haunted tote bag
(it whispers your insecurities in Latin).
MysticMisfits Product Line™
Coming soon to a dimension near you...
Categories:
tote bag, funny, humor, humorous, parody,
Form: Free verse
Eyes close head tilt back...
As I arrived out of thin air
the sand was warm to touch
the tide rush in from the shore
water cool as it covered my feet
rays from the sun heat my skin
I searched for a lounger under a tent
table had a tray of things to enjoy
shades, fruits, books, and glass of ice
cooler with bottled wine and water
warmth and peace was my intentions
I exhaled my tension about winter blues
chose to open water and tasted fresh fruit
poured wine on sphere shaped ice cubes
put on shades, selected a book, and relaxed.
Categories:
tote bag, beach, imagination, sun, wine,
Form: Free verse
In Michigan, we have cherries.
Flavoring our whole state.
Tart juice that drips into everything.
So we add sugar.
Cherry trees nod as we drive by.
To the cherry festival.
I bring a tote bag to catch the cherry candy.
I try to pretend they are healthy.
Sure, they may have been made in a factory…
But the label says “Made in Michigan.”
Which takes my guilt away.
Categories:
tote bag, america,
Form: Free verse
A jackdaw is stealing
my tote bag of unused words,
a rodentlike kibitzer, a pecking dictator
of the worthiness of sounds.
If I run out of bullets now
he will take over my range,
blue-pencil my graffiti,
he will denounce me
as a purveyor of insensible languages,
a peddler of demonstrations
made for the amusement
of dabbling dilettantes.
Then I shall be defenseless.
I will have to render down
the fat of my mind
and when it is all as lean tree bark
it will be my own wickiup,
there I will wait
until he comes creeping again
into my larder, aiming to rob me
of my last cracked chicken bones,
my winter store
to make just a little broth
for my tongue.
Categories:
tote bag, poetry,
Form: Free verse
A God-honored teacher, Miss Ruth Vance
His gift to our town, His circumstance.
No replacing her bulging tote bag -
It was priceless, minus the Gucci tag."
and now the rest of the story....
Teacher extraordinaire, Miss Ruth Vance
taught eighth graders about life, perchance.
From first grade to twelfth, school musician.
Music was her primary mission.
For Halloween, she'd parade the whole school
round and round the gym! What a jewel!
Her eighth graders always danced the May Pole.
Pomp and Circumstance, our seniors' goal.
Christmas plays displayed her special niche;
school choirs of all ages sang without a hitch.
Our Mary Poppins with overstuffed school bag -
Miss Ruth, musician, teacher and wag.
Sundays at noon, she played the town postlude
doors thrown wide open, all ears were glued...
Baptists, Methodists going home from church
heard Miss Ruth, at her Presbyterian perch.
January 4, 2021
contest: Clerihew
sponsor: Regina McIntosh
Categories:
tote bag, 11th grade, christmas, halloween,
Form: Clerihew
School Girl
A thick and heavy wooden door yanked off the wall
Carried into the street by a black man
Peddling wheels and bicyclists ran the streets
People strolled on sidewalks
With hands in their pockets
And music in their ears
A white woman with a large ball of shiny keyes in hand
walked quickly
Butterflies cut out on my pair of blue jeans
Delicate and pretty ones, too,
On my small white ,cotton tote bag
Colorful and young
I walked yonder
To my dwelling place
Into my chambers
Thick sheets and fluffy pillows
Floral window panels with golden accents
A black digital clock on the wall reads 11:11
Strong cologne
In fancy black boxes
A brown wooden frame
With a little school girl in white and navy blue
Marckincia Jean
Free verse
05/08/19
Categories:
tote bag, adventure, butterfly, devotion, education,
Form: Free verse
As I was sitting on a bench and I was looking at this tree
Down ran a chipmunk, who came to say hello to me
I reached inside my tote bag to see what I could find
To give to Mr. Chipmunk while he sat on his behind
I found a bag of peanuts that would suit him very well
I watched him crack them open as he threw away the shell
Down ran another chipmunk to join in for the feast
But she was very cautious, I guess she thought I was a beast
I said hello to Mrs. Chipmunk as she puckered up her cheeks
But she ate so many peanuts that she really couldn't speak
Down ran baby chipmunk as curious as can be
To join in for the picnic; oh my god, now there are three
After they had eaten they had left some peanut trails
Then they chirped to tell me thank you and they wagged their little tails
I'll see you all tomorrow, I want you all, to please come back
I'll bring some peanut butter if you'd like another snack
5-4-2018
Your favorite animal in the wild-contest
Sponsored by Line Gauthier
Categories:
tote bag, animal,
Form: Rhyme
Cameras
The root of my agony
Lies beyond this dollar store
To my foremothers and forefathers
Shackled by thieves
Stolen from the graces of Africa
Their feet once light to
The drum's rhythmic complexity
Now bound in the west
My feet --- diseased
Prohibited to roam
Even in this
Tiny, dusty, dollar store
This Indian man’s curiosity unveils
Equating me to ---a crime
Or a suspect
My large plastic drugstore bag
Opens in obedience
My purchased 18 pack of recycled toilet paper
And four nightgowns
For mama and grandma to share
The Indian man offers
To carry my school supplies
And have them rung up
Cameras watch me
As do the Indian man
In this closed
Confined space
Next trip to the dollar store
I arrive empty-handed
My recycled cotton tote bag
Folded flat
Into my navy blue Land's End
Water resistant jacket
Plastic man
Paid with plastic money
At the exit I
cautiously bare and clutch my tote
To secure
My heavy notebooks
The black plastic bags
Could have torn
By Marckincia Jean
Free verse
09/09/17
Categories:
tote bag, change, innocence, judgement, memory,
Form: Free verse
My plush little Starflyer at pause in her play.
Your doorway to happiness a glance.
A spirit to conquer your independence.
A start, if there ever a chance.
The tote bag you carry
drawn on by it's swings.
The loads that you carry
in briefs and your things.
Excitement ahead.
Your joy bubbling out.
The workout you crave
and spirit on rout.
A time for occasion.
Your remedy now.
A hope for it's future
inciting your vow.
A place to remember.
Your time to move on.
A current behind you
left back till your gone.
Come home for the evening.
Exerting your force.
Spontaneous feelings
as time runs it's course.
The love you have family.
An evening of faith.
The night moving on
to morning and wraith.
Another new day.
You leave to your own.
Your memories left
with the ones you have sown.
Categories:
tote bag, appreciation, character, dedication, identity,
Form: Quatrain
Her only exercise is to get up for food or water
or to relieve herself in her private chamber.
I walk her outside about two or three times a week
but she's no sooner outdoors then she wants to retreat
back to her comfy spot indoors with me.
Her tired old legs are stiff and can't handle the flight of stairs
Thank goodness for My Tasha Girl tote bag.
Her four legs easily fit into the four holes in the center of it.
Each side has a handle and when I hold them together she's a perfect fit.
This makes her journey up and down the stairs more bearable for her
being that much like a piece of luggage, I'm basically carrying her.
Categories:
tote bag, animals, pets
Form: Rhyme