Short Hypochondriac Poems

allergic to bees
my greek honey
Spanishly stung me
now i know the
meaning of hives...

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thinking i
somehow
came down
with
parkingson's
but

then
realizing i was
shaking from
alcohol 
with
drawl...

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My father, an officer in army, his friend too,
A hypochondriac friend who was always blue,
Said I’m off to see the quack,
Doc said, odds against you stack,
Diagnosis: you’re pregnant Rex, out he flew!...

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i know he
just wiped
his nose
while he
coughed
and then
put away
that
shopping
cart

so let me
pick another
while i pick
my nose and
wonder is
that other
person
watching
me because
i'm also

paranoid...

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Hello
Goodbye
Morning
Sickness
Cigarette?
Cancer
Drugs
Salvation
Fluffy little bunnies
Myxomatosis
Yoghurt
Bacteria
Sunshine
Melanoma
Toilet
Armageddon
Death
Everywhere
Drugs
Salvation
Healthy
Obsession
Hypochondriac
Moi?...

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i caught
a glimpse
of sunset

filled with
feelings
fueled

by anxiety
and depression
thinking that this

actually at this
time everyday
my horizon

will repeat
itself thus
upsetting

me knowing
i'll lose her
everynight

again and
again
adinfinitum...

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Philosophers debated:
Can a medium ever be small or large?
Is faux leather from fake cows?
Does a hypochondriac think he has everything except hypochondria?
Do denture wearers always give us false smiles?
If a snail loses its shell, does it become a slug?

For Su’s Suzette Prime contest, 27th November...

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mourning celebrations:

Easter without hunts
or relative sounds,
anniversary knells,
birthday sans icing —

tears well.

you wipe them off the screen,
clean as you go,
wash hypochondriac hands.

green sleeves

on the old oak awakes,
surely timed by mistake —
no one to dance underneath.

Autumnal leaves

ought to be
trickling down Ichabod’s arms
decomposing.

3/23/2020...

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He sleeps and dreams exercise;
             packs his refrigerator
          with fruits and vegetables.
            A "clean eater," you see.

            A worrying germophobe
              so afraid of falling ill;
  Don't dare cough or sneeze near him,
               for he'll run away!



Date written: 08/07/2020...

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Feeling Rough

Sore throat, runny nose,
Could be a cold I suppose,
Or could it be influenza?
I think I need a detox cleanser

Turmeric, folic acid, gingko leaf
I'm feeling rough beyond belief
High B.P. and heart attack
Been called a hypochondriac

Gout in toe, earache
I never know what to take
Rheumatism in both knees
That Ibuprofen gel seems to ease

All my ailments could fill a page
My greatest one is called old-age...

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My face is covered
In splotches
My hair is dull and brown
My stomach bulges
And my butt is fat

My back- it aches
My head- it throbs
I stubbed my toe
Again

He looked at me 
She pulled my hair
And at my clothes 
The always stare

My side- it pains
My finger’s jammed
And in the door
My hand was slammed

There’s a moth
I scream with fright
I run away
With all my might

My room’s dark
My feet are cold
And there’s the boogieman
I was told....

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I"m getting rather faint again
I don"t feel well at all.
My back has gone,my legs both ache
must sit in case i fall

Scurvy,swine flu,measles mumps.
I must have had the lot
I even broke out in a sweat
whilst i was in my cot

The doctor calls,he doesnt care,
Just looks at me and smiles.
I grimace back in pain,not joy.
I"ve just sat on my piles

The end is nigh,and thats a fact.
Of this i can be sure.
My epitaph will surely read..
They couldn"t find the cure...

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