Short Haskell Poems

Beware, Eddie Haskell
  Consummate flatterer
Don't eat up his praise---
   He'll stay thin
      ~ You'll get fatter...

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Oh you poor dear, no comments either?
Maybe you were a little to hard on the beaver.
I’m sure some you will get.
You are their prized pet.
Just like Eddy Haskell and Ward Cleaver....

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Do you recall that ornery rascal
  Who played the role of one 'Eddie Haskell' -- 
    Good morning, Mrs. Cleaver
    And how's my friend, 'the Beaver?' --
  Like a laughing hyena ~ or jackal...

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You’re Laughing Alone
By
Tom Wright

My friends all told me that I was witty,
So from Haskell I headed for the city.
First, a comedy club floor,
Then out the back door,
For my monologue I received only pity.
...

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David and Ricky were cute, at best
Bud Anderson was a clueless pest
But that enduring, fun rascal
our dear Eddie Haskell
provided a refreshing, honest zest!

On A Lim Contest
Sponsor: Joseph May

from the TV show "Leave It To Beaver"...

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Hideous heathen heretic!

Dangerous deadly derelict!

Blasphemous bellowing bunk!

Scandalous scheming skunk!

Rambunctious riotous rascal!

Devious as Eddie Haskell!

Cancerous countywide curse!

That's ok, I've been called worse....

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Wallace “Wally” Cleaver
handsome, well-liked high achiever,
befriended Eddie, so unlike him.
Golly!* Wally wasn’t given to whim!

Eddie Haskell
was a neat, slick, conniving rascal.
With his flattery and pseudo-smiles,
he spiced up the show with his wiles. 

Leave It to Beaver

*Wally and other characters use expressions like “Gee whiz,” “Gosh,” and “Golly.”

September 29, 2021
entered in the Clerihew 2 Contest     Placed 1st
Sponsor: Joseph May...

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