reconstruction
recalling much less than half i wrote
though long ago and miles remote
i remember when
an old black man
walks out from his shack
to fetch his kids' dead kitty cat
then walks back
as I pass by
and glancing up see his eye
meet mine in the mirror and with a sigh
watching end to end
as i round the bend
miss him move again
for we are all now and then
once for all gone with the wind
Breaking down the barriers
That propped us up this whole time
Decomposing our identity down to the studs
As contemplating our next mountain to climb
Shattering our version of self
Loosening what was tightly wound
Refreshing to start seeing the whole picture
Discovering what we thought could never be found
Rightly reshuffling the deck
Rebuilding today better than before
Purposefully putting the puzzle back together
Realizing that some of the pieces don't fit anymore
But the story doesn't end there
While certain parts no longer align
It clears the space for fresh beginnings
Unlimited options ahead to mold our new design
Sticks and stones may break my bones
Fires and screams and fading tones
Children are running from the fires of hell
A little old story Im dying to tell
A rotten of a smell
I t sure aint peace I’m trying to sell
Lies and fears and frightening cheers
Hanging from her toes , split ear to ear
Almost reminds me like the cleaning of a deer
Till this day I still have that fear.
Our history is oh so clear
May say it’s far but feels so near…
If I am honest, the faults I see in others are a true reflection of me...
Oh Lord, help me to recognize my own hypocrisy.
Sometimes it's easy to point at others and see all the bad that is...
But we must be loving and forgiving because we're one of His.
I have plenty of faults that are plain for all to see...
And all I can say is please be patient and forgiving of me.
I am a work in progress and there is still a lot of loose ends...
A lot of rough miles and more losses than wins.
We can't give up because there is still a long way to go...
And I am still discovering faults I didn't even know.
This reconstruction can be hard on one's pride...
But I guess it will continue until we're on the other side.
TK<
this period of my life is my period of reconstruction
i seek God for advice instead of those of this world of overt opinions
yes there are intelligent ones to whom i am lead to seek advice from
however when i need the most essential tools to rebuild and renew, i know that God's truly got me because he GETS ME
no more will the merciless clutches of loneliness render me invisible
no more will self doubt be an acme anvil dropping weight down on my self esteem
no more will fear be the stone cold fear be the dragon breathing fire on my personal choices
through God's Guidance i will prevail, and as a direct result....i will excel....
i started a joke that i would like for you to finish
maybe then i could see that smile of yours again
it used to always make my problems fade away....even if for a little while
life's merciless stratagem has chewed you up and spit you out
the unorthodox maneuvers and sneaky foreign objects have left you battered and bruised
the earthquakes and the heartbreaks have all but rendered you depleted and defeated
however you bounce back inflated only to land in the darkest manhole deflated
it was in your deepest state of unrecognizable that i took a sudden notice of you
i was lead to start a joke and pause before the true punchline
i will wait forever for you to finish i that is how long it would take you
when the curtains come to a final close, i pray that your smile will be like ice cream from a small town dairy queen on a peaceful blue sky sunday
Am I forced to watch you leave again?
My hand is left holding empty air
hadn’t I just held you as we walked?
And now, there is need for repair.
For there is a stitch in my heartbeat,
it snags on something in my chest
another broken piece of myself
left trapped inside my breast.
You took the photo; I got the empty frame,
left me to sift through the debris
couldn’t you try to say more carefully
that you no longer needed me?
The glass that’s on the floor
is the aftermath of our destruction?
It mirrors the repairs to be had on the inside
as the heart attempts reconstruction.