they told me
it had to rhyme
it had to mean something—
something big—
like death, or love,
or the smell of gasoline in a motel parking lot.
so I just sat there
with a busted lighter
and an ashtray full of good intentions,
and the words just
spilled out like a drunk
trying to find my shoes that I misplaced.
this isn’t a poem,
it’s just like life
with its pants down,
asking you to kiss it
before it collapses again,
waking up just to do it over
and over again.
The background is loud and crowded with plots;
blended conversations, a threat to my thoughts.
Clusters of shapes invade my blank space,
shifting without an object to chase.
You float like a figure, just passing through,
with the lighting too sheen to hold on to you.
When the background is different, you have changed
like an undone puzzle, rearranged.
Do you remember me, who sat at your table?
One leg was wobbly, grape juice unstable.
The roll edges were crisp but hollowish inside
like an unreceived hug, uneven beside.
You spoke about me, but never to me
as if autistics weren't part of humanity.
My mouth was mute, but yet my mind spoke.
I pondered your uneven sleeves like an obscure joke.
Is this still you, in a blue tee, without your mom?
My hands are waxy like Grandma's lip balm.
Speaking is arduous; how does one say, "Hi?"
What if it's not you in the background of my eye?
10-16-2024
"rearranged, but still the same"
aBcdefGhijkLmnopQrsTuvwxyz
So many times our lives rearranged
Resilient we are, accustomed to change
Wars, Revolutions, Coups and Upheavals
Plunder and Pillage and assorted evils
Recessions, Depressions, Runaway Inflation
Calls for austerity and eating food rations
Bankruptcies, lay-offs, terminations
Then all of a sudden, rejuvenations
So go with the flow, and just do your best
Give yourself one leg up on the rest
My whole layout you rearranged
fragments fit my shredded heart,
revived by a blackout unplanned;
Cabinets you couldn’t leave closed,
repairing hinges that had fallen apart;
My whole layout you rearranged;
Led me down a route untouched
unprepared for all you would impart,
revived by a blackout unplanned;
All that was familiar now changed
as I stretch along this new chart;
My whole layout you rearranged;
Doors and windows you have opened,
transformed this home from the start;
revived by a blackout unplanned;
Commencement began at the end
I am excited to finally depart;
My whole layout you rearranged,
revived by a blackout unplanned.
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, Rearranged
A black rock slid
the tall spruce shuddered again
shallow roots let go
GINSU-KNIFE EASTPORT , MAINE USA
Great majesterial reign!
Bled into the future on another
Heiroglyphic gain
Storylook nooks
Hoping to cook the books
Struck in awe by the fantastic flaw
As power games sizzle
Im left to nibble
Then recreated in freedom's everlasting draw
Back to neutral
Back to glee
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