Humorous Random Poems

They paid me seventy-eight dollars to break dance he told me
After he did a little break-dancing in my four foot by three-foot office
Slamming his feet...

Read More

SMART ALECK
Smugly
Ugly

CRAZY MINION
Wacky
Lackey

CRAMMED BRIEFCASE
Obese
Valise

GOOD FRIEND
Lover
Cover

BAR-HOPPING
Beaver
Fever

written September 4, 2021...

Read More

Some folks say I am quite good with words, 
But, I hesitate to believe what they say 
Should I have hired on with Merriam-Webster? 
Or...

Read More

(3 Haikus)

Immature - is a
word boring people use to
describe fun people

I should start a book,
a thick notebook to keep
inappropriate thoughts

Ever look at friends
and think, "Wow,...

Read More

If I was a penny and you were a pound,  
we could dance around and around.

They would spend us in every store,       ...

Read More

What if the strange woman walks in here and slaps me?
I am sitting in the beauty shop, being crazy.
We have never met.
She is walking in...

Read More

If I shave with Occam’s razor
I will only grow a gross beard;
And all my scientific friends
Will think that I am truly weird.

If I want a...

Read More

Let me give the facts straight
I didn't write this poem because I want to entertain you by my fascinating wordplays
I didn't write this poem to...

Read More

Here I stand on the front lawn for all gawking passersby to see;
A convenient spectacle on which neighborhood dogs choose to pee!
I try to keep...

Read More

A weight off my mind

I wish the scales
Would fall from my eyes
When I stand and weigh myself
The scales don’t tell me any lies

Telling Porkie Pies

Have...

Read More