As we try to revisit the treatments…
Hoping for a revelation.
As the milligrams tick upward.
My delusions are still unstoppable.
As my fate is no longer in the beyond.
But rather, the beyond is in me.
Categories:
milligrams, angst, mental illness,
Form: Free verse
Little is less than a lot
And most is not a few
I need a handle on this
So I know what to do
When measuring more
Into my favorite recipe
For a palmful is okay
Measuring for me …
Then come the metrics
Confusing me more
I cannot read labels
In the grocery store
I know about ounces
Milligrams are strange
And what is a liter
I cannot exchange
Guess I’ll stop cooking
Lest I overdo the salt
Eating at a restaurant
Then, it’s their fault.
Written September 29, 2022
Categories:
milligrams, change, confusion, me, silly,
Form: Light Verse
Twenty-six milligrams of toothpaste, a coffee jar and a liquidised elephant could never be caught in a net. Neutralizing even a dopey dog barking loudly. And a curtain CCTV closing and opening. Dishes discussing dangerous daggers. And a spotted tea towel waving to a smiley moon. One orchid ornately offers originality. And a queue of curd brains fall like dominoes. A pizza is neither a castle or a house. And houses grin when cleaned. Admire that then. Fetching feeling fraternising fishes flushing fungi. And all the time a melon plays on a swing. Great. *** forty-nine fortified fries. And a dustbin lid. How wonderful. Xxxx polarisation z
Categories:
milligrams, analogy,
Form: I do not know?
Twenty-six milligrams of toothpaste, a coffee jar and a liquidised elephant could never be caught in a net. Neutralizing even a dopey dog barking loudly. And a curtain CCTV closing and opening. Dishes discussing dangerous daggers. And a spotted tea towel waving to a smiley moon. One orchid ornately offers originality. And a queue of curd brains fall like dominoes. A pizza is neither a castle or a house. And houses grin when cleaned. Admire that then. Fetching feeling fraternising fishes flushing fungi. And all the time a melon plays on a swing. Great. *** forty-nine fortified fries. And a dustbin lid. How wonderful. Xxxx polarisation z
Categories:
milligrams, analogy, baseball,
Form: I do not know?
Physician’s convictions to poison their patients,
Procedures with Ether, cold X-Ray stations
A thousand scans in milligrams,
Lobotomies and Amputations…
Surgeries to transform me,
Imperfections to augment
Blood Transfusions, concussions, contusions-
For just a small improvement!
Categories:
milligrams, sick,
Form: Light Verse
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Lovely dreams; purple caribous and pink giraffes amid marvels placebo cycles....
Twineful fertile world always trying to inject its truisms twinkling
Twenty milligrams of cloaked melancholy; and misery loves company?!
As gazing into the storefront window at the merry made mannequins
Wearing their mystical montage apparels; with bipolar pixies pointing
Unto the animated star of recollection, during this narcissistics season....
Manna, while as lavender chimpanzees and yellow sagebrush kangaroos
Gather with the pink giraffes and purple caribous, afore this storefront windows
Relected fiascos injecting, twenty milligrams of placebo into melancholies
Mannequins, always trying to steal away the innocence in truisms dreams!?
Twinkling within their marvels cycle of narcissistics, misery loves companies....
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
....“Animated Montage Manna” ~
Categories:
milligrams, hope, life, love,
Form: I do not know?
Espresso and billows of cigarette smoke
start your life each day, to underwrite and
elevate the squeaky neurosis you display.
Freud and Prozac and Xanax keep you level
but flat, add 60 milligrams of amphetamines
to get your motivation back.
Some say its “creative style” while others say
“you’re very ill” as civilized, certified doctors
proclaim: “swallow every pill!” No more
“Carpe Diem” nor “beckoning to swim out
further,” celebrate you right to cope,
with therapeutic fervor.
Your fading friends alas, contend: “your
brain is now asleep!” Just tweak your dose
and animated you will arise and leap! Skies
ginger with days ablaze cobalt space,
your ability to marvel struggles in
a foggy and muddled place.
Synapses firing, “Control!” my mind has ordered
Norepinephrine reuptake inhibitors…dreams
Carl Jung has ordered. Dopamine, Zoloft or
Ambien, competition to attend, the
imagined dangers that never
really end.
Categories:
milligrams, funny,
Form: Iambic Pentameter
Ninety-nine Milligrams
Corners and shadow, in silence so long
This is my world, it is my own
Does not conform to conventional guidelines
So they labeled it autism
Fools, they are so close to the truth yet so far
Reality is mutable here and so I make it
Heaven and Hell, for many and none
A stained and tainted strand frayed and withered
Time without memory passes
Yet the seasons give testament
Dendrites dance within the cannabis indica
Fractured thoughts and lithium induced haze
He's going back to the future.
Categories:
milligrams, epic
Form: Prose Poetry
The sorrow is too much,
I just cant take it.
I need some kind of crutch,
something to break it.
Happiness escapes me,
there's nothing of the kind.
I must break free,
free my mind.
This needle does the trick,
Filled with bliss.
Just that little prick,
And life I'll never miss.
I'm not what i was,
Ive been beaten down,
And its all because,
That needle was found.
Anything for a fix,
Man i need that high.
Milligrams up to six,
As if i even try.
It seems now I'm down,
man I'm down.
Heroin's got me down,
so far down.
It's time for me to go,
And OD like Cobain.
Come and watch the show,
A needle in every vein.
Categories:
milligrams, artme,
Form: Quatrain
This pill, unable to think well.
Take this quill, dip it in an ink well and spill what I will.
Dazed and confused.
A brain bruised and abused.
Misused mind moving like pond water.
Stagnant
Talking like the Godfather.
Leaning back, staring at the ceiling as if to find some meaning.
But Im lost in my mind.
Blind in my eyes.
A world obscured with time as its only cure.
Answers as absent as a happy past.
Yet, I check the bottom of every glass.
Listen to these words.
As I go on like a broken record.
Constantly talking about what you already heard.
Ecstasy got the best of me.
Still, finding myself not in ectasy.
Sombody check my vitals.
Last Rights recitals echo in my mind.
Bled all I can bleed.
Need to come down, but to what?
Gunshots and cops outside?
Or the perpetual suicide inside?
An un edible vegetable, I am.
Surroundings slowed to a crawl.
Determined not to fall.
In this dimension where I split the tension.
Suspension of consciousness, working words within.
Giving in isn't an option.
Or is it?
Skeptisism turns on a mechanism of views.
Flowing with all kinds of colors and hues.
Categories:
milligrams, imagination, life, time,
Form: I do not know?