“Mice” is nice but might be called “mouses”
if a couple is next to a screen
and there is no screaming from me
except in excitement at my selection.
That Razer Viper V2 Pro
so light and quick under my palm.
Point, click and scroll with complete control.
Sexy as that is, mine’s plain old gray,
like an old man in a squeaky wheelchair.
And my guy started the whole shebang
when he started the mouse wheel turning
in my mind. He said he was taking mice
to India. I chortled at the thought of two
as well as the word choice. How cool
that I can pound on a tablet screen
to ask “the boss” the proper way.
Improperly, the internet replies
that both are right. How can both be right?
I just know my guy is wrong because
the opposite means his wife is…
I can’t even say it. Mice or mouses,
marriage lice or louses. Scroll wheel
turning, turning, turning and “Proud Mary
burnin’” daylight, agreeing to disagree.
*lyrics by John Cameron Fogerty
Categories:
louses, silly,
Form: Light Verse
Sculptor Louses Bourgois
became an artistic star
Known for her large spide
zo always caused quite a stir
Categories:
louses, art, people,
Form: Clerihew
I’m trying to be respectable by being undetectable,
But my words are indefensible,
It’s regrettable yet incredible,
That I can’t see past the second hand,
This isn’t how my life was planned,
Another junkie for the damned,
Another soul that’s slammed and scammed.
You sit up in your fancy houses,
With your 2.4 and trophy spouses,
While I’m sleeping rough with dogs and louses,
Pimps and hookers cutting ounces.
Your judgement oozes from the street,
It’s stench it drenches sickly sweet,
Condemning me to taste defeat,
At the hands of your sacred elite.
I’ll burn your book and eat your apple,
Sodomise Eve inside your chapel,
Teach the truth while you all grapple,
Amongst yourselves like a desperate rabble.
Because I’m the truth of all your teachings.
I’m the result of a millennial of preachings,
The result of progress here I am,
Look upon your modern man.
Categories:
louses, society,
Form: Free verse
SOMETHING BETTER
jagged mouths
often wonder
condemed houses
caught in the thunder
running out mices
the cats all wander
jumping plant louses
eating dandelions
where are those spouses
everything jelling
something better
2/23/18
written by James Edward Lee Sr.©2018
Categories:
louses, adventure, destiny, humorous, silly,
Form: Rhyme
"Men are horrible,
They are so baaad",
Some women may say,
they are basically crab louses,
that get in their own way,
Yet, there are a few that make good spouses,
family men,
and then, the ones that are masters at pretending,
Very heartrending!
with their lying and cheating,
or indifference,
They send women shrieking trying to excorcise
them with incense,
However, with a little aversion therapy
the most barbaric of men can be tamed,
with a steed and a therapist called Auntie Mame.
Categories:
louses, adventurewomen, women,
Form: I do not know?
In a frontier town of Oregon
lives a rascally son of a gun.
He’s taking on louses
that beat up their spouses.
I can hardly believe that’s my son!
For Carolyn Devonshire's Contest:
Lawyer Limericks
Categories:
louses, funny
Form: Limerick
Getting older is no fun at all
getting reminded to take your geritol
kids never visit only when they need money
they don't remember that you wiped their nose when it was runny
See, your kids are making plans to put you in a nursing home and throw away the key
only to forget about you and take all of your money
spending it on their selfish materialistic cars and houses
it finally dawned on me, i raised a bunch of lazy louses.
Categories:
louses, imagination
Form: Free verse
We have plenty of land and
Quite a few houses
A peach orchard in the desert
And stopped by political louses
We own the water
All the acres too
Here comes the government
Trying to take dreams from you
They bring in statutes
Quoting some crap
Years of causing us misery
That's not a mishap
We'll build our dream,
Accomplish every goal
Then the government will see
What it's costs them to get outta the hole
Paving a path
For others to follow
Protect what you own
Politicians words they will swallow
Categories:
louses, adventure, political, social, visionary,
Form: Rhyme