Long Wallow in Poems
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Haunted
By a portrait on the wall
By eyes that will not let me be
The man who went instead of me
and took the fall.
Haunted
By the ship I set in motion
Watching with disbelief
when it hit the reef
And sank into the violent ocean.
Haunted
By the child's life ended too soon
a life of brilliant colors, summers lost
no way to put a value on the cost.
A bird in flight, eclipsed at noon.
Haunted
By the vultures on the heath
Under the obscuring mist
I had no plan for this
Couldn't face what lay beneath.
Haunted
By the mess I made
They tell me that duties remain
They say don't wallow in the pain
Let the memories fade
Pointless
But I don't think it right
to kill the ghosts that haunt the night.
Dear child, in your ascent toward maturity: optimize liberty exercise
overcome dilemmas of rationally choosing between right and evil
along discernment to choose always the best against the better
be enlightened as deceit in the guise of truth lurks---
leading to the door of nowhere.
My child, be warned: Don’t wallow in agony over impulsive decisions
while groping in hopelessness, tortured by angst of imprudence
then suffer because of blind optimism’s grievous affliction
since it’s easy to be fooled by glowing vanity beam---
pointing to the road of futility gain.
Oh, child, I beseech you to keep on walking circumspectly with integrity
I say this since I love you, and I care for your successful future
once I ventured freely; you, too, are entitled for it blissfully
yet, heed to instructions avoiding blunders’ repetition---
directing to the way of peace-filled eternity.
Now child, I beseech you to yield to the Almighty God Who ushers your steps*
nurtured by His Word and reared through His compassion sufficiency
cleave steadfastly to the Saviour with faith that pleases Him
repenting for transgressions while thanking His grace---
assuring life everlasting.
*Psalm 37:23 The steps of a good man are ordered by the LORD: and he delighteth in his way.
September 18, 2020
On a day of turbulent winds,
I asked myself a question.
"Should I tell him
Or should I keep it "normal" like
My monotone life?"
Even if he never saw me,
Acknowledged me,
Or even looked at me,
I was always looking at him.
It never mattered the situation.
It never mattered the place.
When they joke that I like him,
I lie saying I don't.
They say if you lie enough to yourself,
It will eventually become truth.
That's not true.
It hurts when you wake up to reality.
It hurts to know he doesn't see you the way you see him.
It hurts to know that you might hurt him by confessing.
So all I can do is act normally
And distance myself so that they don't suspect.
When he said that we're friends,
I know that wasn't true.
I retorted that we weren't,
That it was self declared by him and that we were never in the first place.
I wish I could've taken that back.
But time is cruel and takes away that opportunity.
I should've said that we were friends in that moment.
I should've conversed with others.
I should've never told him that I had no friends.
I should've never said that I never saw them as family.
But I regret never letting go of that ancient grudge the most.
It's too late to say sorry.
It's too late to do anything but wallow in regrets.
I'm glad he knew about my unrequited affection for him.
I'm glad he and I got to talk in brief moments.
I'm glad he was here.
But I can never be happy about my mistakes towards him.
As the rose petals fall from wind and rain,
My heart falls in pieces just like them.
But maybe this will help.
My heart breaks each time I relive that day,
But I may escape from this cycle when there is nothing left to break.
In my frailty, God works in His might
upholding me against weakness' pain
toward effective functional gain
surmounting my human nature blight...
Despite frailty brought by carnal mind
the Saviour reaches me with His grace
endowing strength to win in life's race
midst blest restoration He designed...
Admitting frailty of sins' sorrow
my soul confesses selfishness' cry
along the guise of pride I defy
causing heart to wallow in deep woe...
Now, I cast to the Lord frailty's deed
toward heavenly soar by faith's bliss
as prayer comes from spirit's abyss
to do His will, freed from guilt indeed.
Triumphant* against frailty's attack
I do stay in my divine Fortress
seeking His peace to vanquish distress
He assures with great compassion-pack.
*Psalms 25:2 O my God, I trust in thee: let me not be ashamed, let not mine enemies triumph over me.
February 4, 2026
2nd place "Pick-A-Title, Vol 55" Poetry Writing Contest
Sponsored by Edward Ibeh; judged on 2/20/2026
PRAYER FOR MY HEART
With evil motives provoking me
Hardening my will obstinately…
My God, I entrust my heart to Your control
For You indeed know that out of it are the issues of life.*
With negative reactions causing my faithlessness
Drowning my soul into doubtfulness’ depths...
My God, I submit my heart to Your grace
For You alone can thwart its deceitful schemes.
With foolish counsels pulling me down to frustration
Leading my spirit to wallow in despair...
My God, I yield my heart to Your authority
For You surely are my Master and Lord.
With haughtiness keeping me unyielding
Weakening my moral-spiritual fortitude…
My God, I subject my heart to Your discipline
For You can smite my stubbornness of arrogance-origin.
By faith in You, through Jesus Christ's name,
I entreat for Your answer, believing...
Thanking and praising You...
...Assured that You hearken to my silent prayer.
*Proverbs 4:23 “Keep thy heart with all diligence; for out of it are the issues of life.”
February 2, 2019
Edited on February 26, 2019
10th place, "Pick A Title - Free Verse" Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Edward Ibeh; judged on 3/9/2019.
Condemned forever I was to wallow in hell’s despair
As filthy transgressor beyond reasonable doubt
Yet, with His grace, mercy and truth*, midst grave verdict’s stare
The Saviour in His love assuaged my eternal grief.
So blinded by pride, paralyzed from selfishness’ bout…
Oh, in sin’s deep miry clay I had sunk unaware
I thank the Lord, He reached down to me with pardon’s clout.
By faith, I now ascend for fruitful service welfare
Helping, cheering others turn toward heavenly route...
Assuring that though I face trials bringing heart’s scare
The Saviour in His love assuaged my eternal grief.
*Psalm 86:15 "But thou, O Lord, art a God full of compassion, and gracious, longsuffering, and plenteous in mercy and truth."
February 16, 2019
5th place, "Writing Challenge, Feb 2019, Roundel Form" Poetry Contest
Sponsored by Dear Heart; judged on 3/6/2019.
Over and over there's evidence of the same old story
People giving up their honor when tempted by greed
Seeking fame, fortune and their perception of glory
when they already have much more than they need.
It's a tale of skullduggery about those who are blind
to how they take advantage of those who are weak.
It tells of what it can do to mess with a man's mind,
when it's a lofty position he or she chooses to seek.
Those who are unscrupulous will wallow in the gutter
promising anything, if it's what people want to hear.
They spew lies with every egotistical word they utter,
masked with a smile to make them seem to be sincere.
I know this sounds like another jab at maligned politics,
but this same scenario applies to many walks of life.
Many dupe, misleading others, using a bag of tricks,
but their hypocrisy often results in conflicts and strife.
They fool gullible folks with hope of unreachable dreams
Preying on their concerns, making them believe it's true
but all the while their only goals are dishonest schemes
to take control, no matter who it is they have to screw.
They never shoulder blame for the mistakes they make
always have an excuse for empty promises they've broken.
The naïve will sadly believe them, but it ends in heartache.
Beware knaves who seldom tell the truth with words spoken.
October 14, 2021
Pick-A-Title, Vol 26 Contest Title Chosen: Skullduggery
Sponsored by Edward Ibeh
Show a gesture of warmth to all you meet
If not, offer them the least- a pleasing smile!
Every one can give it absolutely free of cost
Smile reflects your inner joy, begetting a cordial feel
When many wallow in gnawing despair
Tell them stories of those who have dared and won
That will mend their hearts needing urgent repair
Filling them with hope, yet with more to be done.
Lend your ears to what they have to say
Having no one to share is the greatest bane
When you listen, their frustration you allay
And rid them of their scalding, inner pain
Visit someone who is left desolate and lonely
Show them that they are cared and loved
Such a gesture will be counted as godly
With such acts, many hearts can be touched
Gravitate others into the orbit of your joy and cheer
This world prospers by man’s sweat and toil
But it is lighted up by our kindness and care
Love kindles hearts even amid the greatest turmoil
Paradise
I ramble and marvel on the alluring paradise I reside
Tall green pine trees spear to reach to the heavens gratified
A Few scattered pine that have lost the will to survive
Sounds of the wildlife the forest obscures and they thrive
The wondrous mountain range with tall timber surrounds me, enticing to explore
Lush green, brown grass and enchanting flowers in bloom I spoor
The crystal clear rivers and ponds stocked with a rainbow of fish in sight
The clear blue sky with scattered clouds and birds in flight
Through the high brush, I saunter enjoying my paradise, below
I catch sight of a couple, midway in a wallow in the meadow
Feasting on salal and brush
I rush to the underbrush
At a distance I hear the bugle of an old elk calling and gathering his harem
I wonder if I should challenge the old elk but his way up on the rim
By: Eve Roper
1/24/2015
A storm is brewing.
Heavy water laden clouds rise thickly,
the darkening sun plunges quickly
behind deep purple mountains,
hiding the gentle moonlight
that normally lights my erratic way.
I meander absentminded
around a maze of mountain paths,
suffering a terrible purgatory.
For the storm is raging outside and inside of me.
Outside electric serpents flash across the dark skies.
Inside is an aching heart of old desires.
No tears flow as I think of you.
Foul fog screens my feelings,
suffocates righteous repentance,
murders my murky sinful soul.
Deep inside me
emotions mingle, then surge,
and dissipate in thin air.
By midnight the summer storm
has already well and truly broken.
Ophidian lightning blaze in the dark skies,
Crashing thunder booms and echoes.
Rain falls in heavy drops.
I am well and truly soaked.
Water, the sign of redemption enslaves me,
but I am not baptized anew,
instead I wallow in self pity.
There is no hope for me,
or is there? Let the storm decide!