Long Self important Poems

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Spring Equinox 2018

this middle aged rue stirring bummer
   haint no stranger to cold,
when dark hen stormy wintry days
   eggs hit from Arctic portal en fold
ding Atlantic Seaboard

   in a blizzard of bitterly, blindingly, and
   brutally sub zero temperatures
   from an occasional nor'easter
   fiercely gripping hold

the majority years, sans this prolific
   recalcitrant scrivener lived
   in various and sundry abode
   housed within Southeastern
   Montgomery County, Pennsylvania
   with 19*** zip code,

and during my boyhood recall,
   how massive ice sheets did erode
the (then) opened expansive farmland,
   in preparation for planting time,

   where runnels of frigid water flowed
with childish cheeks exposed to glowed
after hours upon 
   many a green acre got tilled and hoed

despite feeling energized and refreshed
   with arms and legs n'er fro zen
aye didst eagerly await with exuberant yen
kickstarting thy body electric

   experiencing hearthstone nook
   designed and built by Christopher Wren
after heading indoors counting fingers
   and toes to make sure, i still got ten

soon hearing the chorus of fauna,
   and floral kaleidoscope of color 
   aground or taking wing
thus, upon thawing out thoughts
   drifted toward approaching spring,
the season revitalizing 

   dormant natural inhabitants,
   whose excite (like mine) didst ping
announcing the debut of fecundity
nsync with screeching from the lizard king.

This Spring Equinox (i.e. man date:
   12:15 PM Tuesday,
   March twentieth two thousand eighteen)
doth rejuvenate 
   inviolable hibernating animals

   and plants, and me equate
to experience sensation,
   whereby entire being does inflate
and (despite marital status),

   nonetheless envisions another gal asthma mate
no...no...no...please do not think this chap
   mean spirited and under rate
the woman (at present taking a siesta,

   and i breathe easy),
   who oft times doth henpeck, a trait
inherited many a chic hen
   (with tantalizing tail feathers)
   now (until she awakens)
   proscribing yours truly to wait

for my repast most likely ad hoc
moist ideal for any nerdy kid to knock
senseless, the worst facet of self important jock
   consisting of pop slop mock
Hungarian Goulash, a melange
   of relics from age old meals 
   transformed into a petrified sawed little rock.


Choices of Past Forebears

Random chain of events
preceded occurrence re:
guarding existence of me
interminable fits and starts
concerning self destruction
inherent within one measly
self important species.

Yours truly synonymous 
with any chance reader
(of course inclusive those 
untold past multitudes,
who trod upon this oblate 
spheroid preceding one

anonymous groveling, 
middling sniveling modest
*****sapien) pursuant 
upon unknown destination
giving contemplative, 
introspective, speculative...

pause every now and again, 
asper bajillion prior
bipedal hominids, whose 
individual deliberate or
random natural biological 
impulses wrought sons

and/or daughters, whose 
subsequent call, sans their
wild procreative proclivities 
unwittingly begat the
unique chromosomal 
combinations inscribed genes

imbuing each of us with 
transient occupancy to revel,
relish, reckon very finite 
number of orbitz around
nearest star, how longevity 
(till mortality – leisurely

and/or vocationally) 
expended, yet anatomically,
biochemically, physiologically...
linkedin with avast
gamut incorporating 
unknowable determinants sole

fully cobbling wide, whirled 
webbing, (albeit skein
microscopic) comprising 
resultant Deoxyribonucleic
amalgamations, combinations, 
emulations...throughout

untold generations eventually 
giving (swell pregnant)
rise to healthy progeny 
predicated on an uneventful
tragic mishap in utero 
preceding parturition, which

miraculous seminal fertilization 
regarding series of
fortunate events delineating 
quintessentially strapping
robust tot destined (years later) 
to continue human

species, thus I ponder 
tremendous steep odds (analogous
to drawing winning lottery 
ticket), when reproductive
processes diploid propagating 
one after another ongoing

generation, yet in retrospect 
every cellular T-Mobile
chance coupling attendant on 
haphazard spontaneous

buzzfeeding circumstances 
promulgating prolific primal
precedents begetting each 
individual necessitating tenuous

fluke (worm hungers) engaging, 
engendering, engineering... 
(similar to science experiment) 
endowing penultimate on the fly 

fusion between two haploid cells 
impossible to explain convincingly,
(asper in my mind) the notion 
predestination intervenes
likened to invisible hand.

If Trump wins rest in peace Mother of Freedom

If Trump wins...rest in peace - Mother of Freedom

Post mortem courtesy 
Doctor Demento yielded 
Lady Liberty lies slain...
videre licet knocked senseless 
from brutal blows upon her crown
simultaneously shouldering existential crisis
triggered nervous breakdown
though rendered mute 
sound of silence doth expound.

Forsooth impeachment hearings 
rendered him immune 
to chastisement, insurrection 
he did foment, blithely 
skirting impairment appertain
blood on hands of
self important president,
though alcohol he doth abstain,
nonetheless permanent drunken stupor
doth wax and wain

finger of guilt
damaging democracy points
to him as chief villain
groomed since... time immemorial
atavistic primate brain
bathed (courtesy Frederick Christ Trump)
buzzfeeding chosen favored heir
go for broke – as a red badge of courage
bankrupt countless times
and pulled out all stops,

viz unbridled thundering, 
espousing philosophy gain
amass wealth, unscrupulous
if necessary where,
might equals right cold play'n
deadly serious game (Life) train
sight squarely and/or roundly
scattered lovely bones
amidst tombstones testimony
incidental secondary fallout main

part and parcel, where legerdemain,
plus art of the deal linkedin
with immeasurable gloating
ego necessary to gain
con fetter writ oligarchy plain
successfully cheating, hocking,
milking, quaffing, and trending,
yielding dynastic rule
trumpeting eternal and carnal
stormy Daniels reign

vaping with wealthy
zealotry (think vain)
at electorate expense
tampering koolaid acid test
courtesy illegals sown GMO grain
colluding when/where possible,
never losing sight regarding
selfish mission to attain
obligatory ideal tyranny
rampantly running roughshod,

no need to explain
writing sleight underhanded profane
antithetical, critical, heretical quatrain
badgering, belittling, besmirching,
bilking, boasting, bragging with disdain
flagrantly flaunting, fleecing,
regarding purported B.S. degree
in economics he did attain
matriculating Wharton School of law,
hmm... methinks he paid

hireling from Ukraine
forever flirting, flouting, and flunking
even basic geography questions
case in point being 
where is Drury Lane
additionally, he ain't 
no literati familiar
storied quasi fiction Citizen Kane.
Form: Rhyme

Twas Fortnight Before Inspection 2021

Twas fortnight before inspection 2021...,

Not a human creature stirred, nor seen 
throughout Highland Manor, 
property carpeted in lush green
gently hilly terrain,
(a deathlike stillness descended un keen
quiet and quite cool April 26th, 
deux thousand twenty one).

Vicious rumors circulate wrenching
hammering, and drilling psyche
where mailer demons invade,
that immediate hell fire enfilade
natural hair color made
gray follicular shocks amply pervade
instantaneously turning
Janus faced with Machiavellian

mean streak inlaid
(how word some would say)
"stern", any previous
housewarming aura
experiencing welcome spiel,
nor iota of politesse present,
but Trumpeting her entourage,
asper self important capering escapade

taskmaster known to abrade
even the most stalwart macho,
gung-ho, brave heart appear afraid,
thus oft time tis most
advantageous and optimal
prospective mutineers betrayed
Princess Ja***n Ge***r
harridan de jure ushering tirade

akin to a petit grand mal one
woman banshee masquerade
hoop puts on be preyed
upon switching pretentious airs
dead ringer give
away (immediately
points gnarled finger
sentenced to clinker visage),

non verbal charade
hence unstoppable mounting
anticipatory anxiety manifests
as disabling, impending,
oppressing fate
cannot be delayed
if insubordinate tenants
try with futility to evade

officials with truncheons flayed
doth rarely give surcease
renters passing grade
she, the consummate
de facto grande heiress
of Gr***e & Qu**e
inherited plum deal,
where lifetime employment,

and generously paid
analogous as born
(that way) portrayed
maintaining poker face
into royalty made,
now as single mother
to biracial heir
purportedly inhabits castle

abode with parents,
thus no child
care costs paid
expectant heavy foot
falls getting louder,
(oh...no that jist
my heart pounding
whence approaching raid

so please inform this jade
did troubadour if privy to let
(me and the missus) aid
i.e. a safe and sound
place to call home
with this hole in the poetry wall,
I would immediately
make thee a fair trade

in lieu of living, where
mercilessness doth parade
expenses property upkeep,
teaching (two 
door ring) English,
or even employed
as a mister minute maid.
Form: Rhyme

Reminiscence of Summer (For Maxine Grace Hylton)

Before that day splashed  everything with light
I  played in solitude with cuddly clouds
And watched them form changing figures, blight
The sky or bring the sobbing sludge of rain,
            Or etch your portrait
                    where the spindly sparrow fly
                       looping your beauty with the breathless sun

We watched them 
                         fall like shattered diamonds 
                            once from a window battered
                                with fragile 
                                                dreams
                                                           of tomorrow
And you said they were our prancing children in the water
Little Shangos you called them,  and we kissed
In passion, filling love with lissom lilacs of laughter
For life was an eternal summer then
Winter was barred from where it had never been
Barren landscape scarred by the lecher, not the sun
Shrivelling petals and prayers, lynching the hearts like trees
Barren 
    and scraggy
           shredding the eye 
                 Brambled 
                     fingers clutching sky
       Tolling voids of air like a crucifix
          Self important because of the importunate
            Castling citadels of calamity against the hearts fear
               The wind exploits the calamity of leaves
                  Only a shell of sultry shadows was left
                     And I bereft
                       Tented my exultation
                          To wait your coming again
                             And the annihilation of pain.
Clouds are drifters of the sky,  I am enfolded in cerulean blue
Dark indigo of heart on the promenade
Children feet splashing the frazzled dry of sand
I shriek like a gull slant against the wind
Where the splashed sand grits the eye
Summer seas are all of winter's tears rinsed in light
Itinerant birds frolic here: innocence excited emits delight,
      For lovers are children
         Too trusting uncarefully 
            Undermarcated wrong or right
              As summer splash them like sprays
                 Glinting the eye Where the starving eagle plays'
                      I slant away to reminisce alone.


Apparently My Poetry Is a Pile of Bourgeois Crap

With a mag called POETRY, I spent time
Hoping to find verses sublime and sage
And for all I read, not two words that rhymed
Just chopped up prose splayed all over the page.

This left me just a little bit perplexed
So I decided to investigate
What I did find on Google left me vexed.
It seems that rhyming is so out of date!

Some academics, who think they could note
A cultural conservative leaning
By meter and rhyme: For whom I would vote
An implicit Bourgeois type of meaning!

To which I exclaimed out loud, “Shucky gee,”
‘Tis such a shameful verbal undressing.
The poems that I write are not P.C.?
Imagine the poor folks I’m oppressing!

perhaps if I wrote a bunch of random
                                                                                          words
                                  and arranged them 
                                                bizarrely
                                             on the page and didn’t
                                                                     capitalize
and ensured a total lack of rhyme or rhythm
then, then some establishment of
                                                                   Persuns
                who make their living criticizing other people’s writings
                                                               and maybe even write themselves
                           would call it poetry?
     I thought the idea here was to communicate?
                                  How naive!

Oh the stuffiness
Self-important silliness
Such puffiness
Self-conscious no-frilliness

Whoops! I hate when I do that.  Such a chump!
Breaking into rhyme like a “middlebrow.”
Kneeling at the poetic shrine of Trump.
Please, Mr. Self-important, show me how!

My thoughts on this are as follows: Bollocks!
This steaming pile of misinformation,
Your verbal equal of Jackson Pollock,
My heart’s best means of communication?

I want to have the “right” feelings and thoughts
And express them just like all you smarties.
Sans emperor’s new clothes, I have been caught
May I go to your frankfurter party?

3/11/16

Snaggletooth the Snitch

Me and the missus live in decent
sturdy accommodations (formerly 
Schwenksville Elementary School
ofttimes referred to as prison,
and manager as the de facto warden),
albeit not so shabby nor chic low income 
quite modest (rather unmatchable cost wise)  
low slung building we rent,
for mere dime a dozen 
pennies on the dollar,
which facility lacks no shortage

of gossip mongers 
with mail delivery major event
whereby many old people smelling of unguent
housing faux superman 
thumping flabby chests nsync
with hooking thumbs around
suspenders feigning to be affluent,
and self important as secret double agent
yeah, minus the countless snitches, 
livingsocial buzzfeeding rumors 
outside our one bedroom apartment

at Highland Manor ranks 
as satisfactory ascent
to appease our taste, 
and general environmental ambient
aspects compared to other 
(mice and roach infested)
housing previous situations of ours
so, despite most every nosy, ancient
snooty, hoity toity...tenant,
particularly one butch,  
cock eyed louey, facial accent

a perfect spectacle for circus big-tent
single bucked sharp front tooth 
sparkles, mocks, glistens...
as if brushed with Pepsodent
of course displayed "FAKE" 
seventh heaven-sent
friendliness, when poor us 
being penniless with just tencent
copper piece experienced warm welcome 
short time after moving here
(five plus years since July 1st 2022),

but demeanor thereafter went
postal stamping like the dickens 
as if me an unrepentant
jokester, nonetheless yours truly minds 
against hateful words adamant
lee averse to cast aspersions, 
cuz a friendly gesture linkedin
preference to be cogent practicing
what this atheist doth silent
lee preach, sans attempt tubby tolerant
in the face of someone belligerent

attentive to credo, dogma, ethos 
while alive in world be tolerant
of others, whether he/ she wuzzent
pleasant recalling days of yore, 
I felt disgusted when hell-bent
to hurl expletives (adding insult to injury)
if  bad mouthed me, thus 
object lesson not requiring fervent
fanatical religious fervor  
improving health of Clark Kent.
Form: Rhyme

Anthropocentrism Wreck Less Track Record

while atop the surface of planet Earth humanity
     all abustle skittering
     to and fro, hither and yon
engaged in self important activity yielding profits,

     sans blood, sweat and tears won
full throttle industrial
     manufacturers quaking unstoppably
     only intermittently pausing,

     where managers standing arms akimbo
     asper quizzical looking hue cree ton
megaphone blaring orders to underlings
     so "Boss" tweed can line pockets
     for his/her daughter and/or son
Head Honcho most aggrieved,
     when red ink doth run

undermining the bottom line,
     thus farming out labor to distant places
     (where wages amount 
     to pennies on the dollar)

     locals such as Lake Woebegone, Qum, Timbuktu,
     et cetera where pun
gnashing working conditions tantamount
     to slave labor,

     yet scare other options open
hence able bodied men,
     women and children scramble,
     despite back breaking grueling physically
     exhausting grunt job accepting second to none

with nary any rest for weary
     long as workweek includes a mon
day, where bloodied bare hands claw
     purported Mother lode 

     with feigned frenzied zest
enterprise bolstered 
     via executive bank ministers
     financing lucrative scheme
     attended to by majordomo
     attired in expensive vest

corporate investment project elicits
     quaffing, imbibing, and chugging elixir
     produced from heavily guarded recipe
     qua electric kool aid acid test
where coeval business men/women rest
assured bonanza forecast upon

     former green acres hiding treasured quest
marginally concerned such nettlesome
     pillaging, ravaging, torturing ranks
     wealth driven vanity as deleterious pest

shortsighted exploitation money making embarkation
     glorified as investment nsync to feather nest
retirement funds despite leaving the environment messed
up, whereby future generations saddled with

     poorly bandaging gentrifying, resuscitating
     gaping wounds upon Gaia at best
shortening quality of life
     for all (poetry) Earthlings aye attest.

The Abc's of Politics (For Better Or Words)

The ABC's of Politics (For Better or Words)
(SMILE!  They aren’t misspelled.)

Aboulomania.  Bahadur.  Caducity.  Dapatical.  Ecmnesia.  Fabulist.  Gerrymander.  
Highbinder.  Ideopraxist.  Jobbery.  Kakistocracy.  Lucripetous.  Malversation.  Nomocracy.  
Obrogate.  Papyrocracy.  Quadrennium.  Raconteur.  Satisdation.  Talliate. 	
Unconsentaneous.  Vacillate.  Wondermonger. Xenogenous. Yare. Zabernism.

That's Today's Politics Just for You!
Dictionary Reference: http://phrontistery.info/a.html
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The ABC’s of Politics (For Better and Words) 

A-- aboulomania    (pathological indecisiveness)
B-- bahadur 	(self-important official) 
C-- caducity	(being of a transitory or impermanent nature)  
D-- dapatical 	(lavish; sumptuous; costly)
E--ecmnesia 	(loss of memory of the events of a specific period)
F-- fabulist 	(one who invents fables)
G – gerrymander    (to divide electoral districts for one's own political gain)
H – highbinder  (scheming or corrupt politician)
I-- ideopraxist 	(one who is impelled to carry out an idea)
J-- jobbery (the conduct of public business for private gain.)  
K-- kakistocracy   (government by the worst)
L-- lucripetous  (eager for gain)
M--malversation (corruption in office; corrupt administration; misconduct)
N-- nomocracy  (government based on legal system; rule of law)
O-- obrogate 	(to alter the law by passing a new law)
P-- papyrocracy  (government by newspapers or literature)
Q— quadrennium (period of four years)
R-- raconteur 	teller of anecdotes
S-- satisdation	provision of security  
T-- talliate 	to impose a tax
U-- unconsentaneous 	not in agreement
V— vacillate 	fluctuate in opinion or resolution  venal 
W—wondermonger (one who promises miracles)
X—xenogenous (due to an outside cause)
Y-- yare (marked by quickness and agility; nimble; prepared; easily)
Z-- zabernism (misuse of military authority; bullying)


Did you like the joke?  Please go to the Narrative Version, next.
Form: ABC

Premium Member All Stand

All Stand

Here comes the President, of Our land, Our Nation. 
He is tall and smart, and speaks from the heart. 
Not always nicely. 
Not everyone hears him, some wish he would be quiet. 
Not everyone likes him, some wish he would resign. 

I don’t care. 
I dare.
I voted for him, because “they” were against America. 
It does not matter which party I am. 

I don’t care. 
I dare. 
I voted for him, because “they” were against America.
“they made that clear then… and now…”
(they held their hands up as one… I watched the debates…
I was horrified, as none stood for the Citizen’s of Our Land, not one)

I watched closely as the mid term’s provided bugs to eat the capital.
I stared at the screens of fake news while they built houses of lies, 
neighborhoods of deceit, and unrest among the populace.
Great people in power pouring their gray water into the public drinking system…
That we may all feel so self important, as to now see …
Evil in fancy dress, living in castles on hills surrounded by poverty and disease. 
(the return of the dark ages) 
The sign post up ahead, “Welcome home.” 

I found out the last guy left a mess. 
No surprise…
Words like swamp have been around for years, so have the alligators.
Deals done in the dark, between offices representing all of us,
to steal gain, for self worth. Family fortunes, 
made on the backs of peasants, 
whose hopes and dreams were for a better tomorrow. (for all)
No surprise…

America the beautiful, the land of plenty, “In God We Trust”. 
Everyone wants to come here. 
(including the socialists and communists
and all those that hate her for their own personal reasons)
But so many instill fear.
We don’t want you…here.
Beware. 
“WE” do care!
“We” will dare.
To stand up, stand for and stand against. 
To have... upheld, to uphold and to; 
hand down, hand shake or shake up…
anyone and everyone that try’s to stop…
Our President. 

God Bless him, I voted for… 
quit trying to impeach him, 
he is doing the job.
© Ann Foster  Create an image from this poem.
Form: Narrative

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