When I Tried To Read Jane Eyre

I’ve gone through some boring times, they’re inevitable in life, luckily, I can truly say, that I’ve never faced real strife. In fact the only moment I ever felt great despair, was as a teen in high school, when force to read Jane Eyre. Good lord was the book boring, so self-important and dull, even worse with feminist teachers pounding it into your skull. I couldn’t even finish it, and I very poorly fared, an A-student who loved to write, bored senseless by Jane Eyre. The other boys did little better, and it became a running joke, how it could be used as torture, more cruel than any blow. Young men need something heroic, where good guys go on a tear, full of vigor, they’ll never stop for the musings of Jane Eyre. And now, all these years later, it seems blocked from my brain, wasn’t there a Lowburn school, or something like that name? I remember there was Rochester, and his crazy wife upstairs, but honestly that’s all I recall of that blasted book Jane Eyre. Some people proclaim it a classic, and that folks like me are dolts, but if that is what a classic is then please leave me with my pulps! Perhaps most of these classics should go and grow a pair, because I’ve never been more bored then when I tried to read Jane Eyre. …Of course, I’m an adult now. Maybe I’ll see something I didn’t before. I should try…zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz….