Long Porker Poems

SHOT AT…
Yes I went shooting with some city fellows to the Moonie
We got a place to shoot that had the wild pigs
So we are walking through a crop of something green and blooming
When a porker...

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Best to get there early and don’t forget some food and drink.
It’s Friday again and time to celebrate.
It’s hat week, Carmen Miranda’s birthday, toga, toga, toga.
We all had another week taking care of 80 children...

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A strange woman blasted into the family reunion
Came in loud and crass; obnoxious. Showing off.
No one knew her.
I was selected to ask her to leave.
Mom! She said.
It was one of my foster children from way...

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I've a tractor in the garden and a tractor in the shed,
I've a tractor in the field and a tractor in my head,
Proud to be a country farmer, I'm outstanding in my field,
And a country...

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Five fat Porkers

Five fat Porkers, in a Pig Sty
Eating Swill and Cabbages,
Grunting with a me oh my.

One of these Pigs called Emily,
Was taken out one day,
Now delicious rashers of Bacon,
Three cheers and a hip hooray....

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She is such a pretty porker the old sow said.
I thought you were too old for swine, said cousin Fred.
I may be tough, but I am certainly not dead,
She is a gorgeous gobbler, the old...

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For there abide beef, pork and chicken
and the greatest of these is bacon
hot sizzling crispy to the tongue
satiating succulently scrumptious bacon.

For bacon curries no favor
plays the field tempts the stoic and saintly
slides into gustatorial beds
romps...

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Forkaroon : I hear we are in for a big treat tonight forksie 
Forksie:    Oh Ya !  I was hoping for something exciting and juicy 
Forkaroon: I'm going to give you...

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hope the driving force of the world
a mouse dropped in a vat of water with no chance of escape
circling the bucket to no avail will let itself drown
at the last minute picked by its tail...

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Flawsymay Mindgone is here to play.
I look in the mirror and know I am in trouble today.
She roller skates in the house and puts mud on the floor.
She calls up the neighbors and runs nude...

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I really should’a read the fine print when I bought a ‘micro pig’
For this porker is enormous, surely it’s not meant to grow this big!

I really should’a read the fine print when I brought an...

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San-Goanna Blue

Morning Halliwell are you right?  {rhymer halliwell is 85}
or have your toes tucked up so tight,
are you with us or cantered through,
beyond the vale Saint Peters Zoo,
no brown snakes there tonight?

Or are you...

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