Long Hesitantly Poems
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She jolted when she heard the forceful knocking at the door
not sure if when it opened who she'd find,
the same reaction to a knock came several times before
much more and she would go out of her mind.
Peeking from upstairs window through a curtain just to check
who it could be at this late time of night,
a man in uniform was leaning back, craning his neck
as she stepped back in shadow, out of sight.
It looked like a Policeman, a patrol car on the drive
good news, or maybe not, ran through her thoughts
but either way she'd made it through another day alive
by staying home a bit more time she'd bought.
Out of her high school class of girls whose christian name was Jane
in just two weeks four out of five had gone
holed up inside suburban fortress, only she remained
alert, awake, afraid, the only one.
Unlock four bolts, take off the chain and move the desk away
then hesitantly opening the door
the nearby street light shone upon her pallid face of grey
as he stepped in and strode across the floor.
Securing the door once again, she asked 'Do you bring news?
Developments at all of any sort?
Is homicide progressing on the identity of who's
behind all this and gonna get 'em caught?”
“ We've evidence”, the Policeman said “ that's moved the case along,
we found the cellphone that made all the calls,
also the record that you heard in background, the same song,
and photos of you plastered on the walls”.
“Thank God! At last, great news , now what?” she gasped after a while
do I know who it is, who it could be?
The officer looked down, nodded his head, then with a smile
said “ Yes, the room was mine- now, come with me”
For contest 'A poem with a chilling twist', sponsor frank Herrera.
7th September 2016
I am ever so sorry to you Joanne
And I only can apologize for what
I am hesitantly about to mention
and say let alone speak these word's
and express these thoughts out loud
As you are coming over on holiday
on this the 1st of June to visit both
your mum and I
But being as I am your brother and
love you so I do not wish to lie
For since we haven't seen one another
in the flesh for over 2 long year's now
I know and fear I will in fact disappoint
you when you see me my ever-loving big sis
As the time we have lost and spent apart
To me has not been kind and you as I
may find it hard to assimilate the person
I am now and have sadly become
And thought abounds me of you
upon leaving wishing you had never
taken your time to come at at
Is keeping me awake way into the
dead of night when I try and sleep
I can and may just about be able to
deal with the disappointment I feel
within myself
But seeing that very same disappointment
reflected in your eyes
I fear may well be something far to
hard than even I can take and face
And why I say I am ever so sorry Joanne
Deep in the desert
Where the sun shines
Bright and hard
Lived a little flower
Pale as the sand
It stood bravely
The sun beat on it
The wind blew in it
The heat almost
Took the life out of it
But there it stood
In the clear night
Beneath the canopy
Of thousand of stars
Morning brought a traveler
From some place afar
He stopped by the plant
To wash himself
Few drops spilled over
To the pale flower beneath
A shiver went thru’ her
And tremblingly she unfolded
A few more drops
And the petals
Stretched themselves
Hesitantly, tremblingly
As if some force
Pushing them out
Of her dream of death
Eternity, holds her breath
The pretty petals
What a sight to behold
Seemed to be overwhelmed
By unstoppable madness
A little place
Of sensual joy
Thus life reentered
Joyously
What a moment ago
Had been dead
Entered it visibly
Passionately
In all its glory
The wayfarer
Looked down with a start
As if surprised
To see such beauty
In the barren desert
Bent down
And plucked the flower
And put it against his heart
And there she can
Be seen now
Happily riding away.
You tempt me
As I sense your presence by my side
The whisper of your flowing silken dress
A whiff of fragrant jasmine scent.
You tempt me
With each flicker of your doe-brown eyes
Shadowed in lilac hues and full dark lashes
A smile, partly concealed on pouting lips.
You tempt me
With curvaceous waves of long black hair
Cascading by glowing peach-rose cheeks
Rising, falling on your breast with every breath.
You tempt me
As you stand against the evening light
The Aphrodite of my dreams and fantasies
Seductive, alluring and desirable.
I temp you
As gently I pull back my straying hair
Nestled on the fullness of my breast
Exposing what your famished eyes are feasting on.
I tempt you
In silent expectation my body glows
With purpose of fulfilment I slowly make my way to you
My haloed shadow dances on your rigid form.
I tempt you
Breathless, you lean against the wall
My desires surging at this sign of weakness
Within inches of your body, I languidly pause.
I tempt you
Sensuously, at satin ribbons my fingers pull
Until my struggling gown hesitantly quivers
Before it glides and gathers at my feet.
I tempt you
Grounded by wanton cravings, I look you in the eyes
I simply smoulder there within your reach
The final vestige of abstinence still lingers in the air.
I tempt you
Then I lean in, my breath is warm upon your check
Against your heaving chest my breasts now brush
I breathe and whisper softly “Come to me.”
I tempt you
Inveigled in this rare moment, my heart bursts
As you crush my body tightly against yours
You taste the temptress kiss that frees your needs.
I tempt you
For my heart has long been tempted
By strong unquenched desires
For you.
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Co-written by Paul Callus & Eileen Manassian (Appassionata)
In the vast field of beings, some are stars casting kindness,
Somehow born with a mirage that drips mercy of its own accord.
They traverse valleys and deserts, spreading, unwavering, their pure essence,
While others, with kindness held beneath the leaves of the heart, offer it hesitantly.
They are generosity embodied, with palms open towards the sky,
Even when the sky is barren, asking nothing in return.
They do not demand we understand, as they breathe droplets of color into us,
That penetrate the veins of life, turning macadam into a silk road.
They are luminous beacons; in tumultuous times, they are our anchor,
And perhaps we too, are a haven for a moment in this ballet of fate.
Then, the storm passes, and each raises their sails to catch another wind,
New paths on the horizon, while desires twinkle behind like light on the waves.
They are the ones who ignite the light in unknown depths,
Awakening in the soul what it had forgotten it could illuminate:
Hope, joy, the delicate, magical thread of an unreal connection,
Silent proofs that souls can communicate more than the spoken word.
By their side, we find peace, stringing thoughts like beads on a thread,
And the heart, like a placid ocean, forgets to ripple in turmoil.
These people, whom we discover not with eyes, but with our whole being,
Though we try, we cannot forget them, for their imprint has shaped us.
With very few we resonate in the absolute, in perfect harmony,
And those found must be kept, not let them slip away
For they are our solace, the sweet balm of our days,
We are the clay of the same soul and the hearth of the same inner flame.
Broken mirrors crush me under deceptive appearances,
mutilated wisdom whistles hesitantly,
the heron gropes, flying through fragile fantasies and follies lost in the penumbra
Penumbra that pulses,
words flow like a black river rolling shadows,
Shadows that gaze at me with empty eyes,
routine breaks my shattered steps,
meaning seeps away,
I wonder if the murmur is worth it
The gloomy murmur of the moment hides a strange beauty,
the sky cracks with lead weeping liquid silver,
bitter drops burn my skin,
wounds sprout like lost roots from trees fallen in silence
Silence that presses,
nostalgia is the ash singing of a extinguished fire,
the obsession with time pours a cold blind eternity,
eternity that crushes weak dreams,
the moment captures and absorbs everything like a sea chewing shadows
Shadows of lost ships melt into viscous waves,
echoes fall silent under the broken sky,
meaning whispers a concocted story,
Story that bites,
silent screams vibrate under my skin,
broken light rocks me gently
Gently I float through the mist, the walls breathe silence,
shadows dance on dusty and cracked floors,
Cracked like the soul,
the dry leaf glides on a nameless lost river,
melancholy caresses a thin veil between longing and oblivion
Oblivion that calls me,
the abyss growls a strange peace,
the black moon grins in the sleeping waters,
Sleeping waters whisper,
thoughts break like scattered threads,
the sky crushes the moment,
The moment crushes meaning, water runs far
Far flies the heron buzzing over the mist,
words merge with winding shadows,
routine gnaws at cold roots,
eternity sleeps under the dull shining slab,
the dull shining slab calls me in a dream
She came in all bouncy and cute too.
As almost all six-year-olds do.
I had no idea why, she seemed adorable to me.
When I am not in the class, I do not often see…
What errors have been made.
whether the room is sunshinr or shade.
Who was at fault, her or her teacher.
Not one to lecture, I am school counselor, not preacher.
I have two sisters, she told me.
A bit reluctantly
How old? I; did ask.
She thought really hard, tiny daunting task.
One is two, one was four yesterday
What great ages I say.
You can have both, she told me a bit hesitantly.
And you won’t have to pay, they are free.
Laughing water flows gentle
Against smooth stones
Whispering softly, soothing
Like a smile projecting love
Wishful sun glowing pensively
Erasing the morning dew
Brightening my life with hope
For a new day, a fresh light
Careful breeze blows hesitantly
Breathing hope to the mind
Who knows that this kind melody
Raises praise from the heart
Miracles from the earth cry out
Silencing the gasps of longing
From those who know no faith
Designing sighs of amazing grace
Prayers murmured from naked souls
Coloring the spirit in tender joy
Lavender, mauve and shimmering golds
Blushing sparks of creativity
Inspirations from tree and bird
Silence even the heart’s shyness
With clever songs of delight
Capturing peace and bringing insight
There is kindness and truth within
Where generosity gives again
Hope, faith and love that is endless
Brought to life by God’s brilliance
-3-12-14-
change is a challenging chore
I'm seeking for God's light to dawn upon me
chilled to the bone - I step on a black and white floor
I'm holding back tears that convince me that I'm a coward
I crave change in my life
bring back the light
do me a favor
give me one more chance
I need healing this night
I am kneeling in fright,
I wont start a fight
I won't start a fight
I won't start a fight
change is a challenging chore
I'm screaming for safety's sake
don't let me break
please don't let me break
my life's at stake... give me a break
save me from giving into lies
in my callous past
chained to this depression, I drag my feet more and more and more
Dragged face down on the filthy floor
my feet drip with poverty
why did I allow this in the first place?
how did this happen at such high degree?
or was it all my fault after all?
I must stand tall and I must stand tall and I must stand tall
I told my hands to rest for a moment
I put my head down hesitantly and slowly
blowing out the candles one by one
one by one until it's pitch dark
the ebony crows CAW! CAW! CAW!
that's all I saw that's all I saw
my flaw...and I fall in appall
now I think change is needed
I accept the truth
I put my head down feeling the same shame without a name
my reputation is blown into smithereens
why must you intervene and spill the beans? ? ?
I crave an end to this most shocking strife
change is a challenging chore, yes indeed it is
change is required of us
change is good for us
Change sometimes allows you to sacrifice something for it
I'm sinking faster than the Titanic ship
I need to get a grip
I need to get a grip
I need to get a grip
before I slip on my face
like a worthless disgrace,
choking and throwing up regret
This hardship will pass
Cast out doubt
Stop acting like an ass!
Don't be a spoiled brat - you know what I'm talking about!
You're like a storm
That will pass and eventually transform into a sunny, gracious day
Deleting all dismay and I pray and welcoming change in each and every life
Take that for a change!~~~
Mesmerizing trance
Seductive dance
Bouncing flames
Endlessly change
Feel fire’s soul
Rising from the coal
Warm and inviting
Seductively enticing
I’m drawn deep inside
Where the secrets hide
Where oxygen thrives
Keeping flames alive
I want the heat
the flickering beat
as flames rise up
and then retreat
Starve the fire
of oxygen and wood
and it’s soul soon dies
As a human life would
Comforting to know
that it burns for me
I need the certainty
Even when I can’t see
Near enough
to feel the heat
Wanting consumption
to feel complete
Against my will
Denying the thrill
I hesitantly turn
Fearing the burn
Nurturing the fire
Takes more than desire
to watch the flames
as they dance higher
It’s the core inside
where life resides
flames now retreating
Fire’s heart slows beating
Embers glowing
not ever knowing
Will life reignite
or extinguish tonight
Knowing that soon
With naught to consume
Fire’s beauty will just
Becomes ashes and dust
Blackened and dark
No hint of a spark
Feeling the cold
Fire’s secrets untold