Long Gherkins Poems

“Everybody duck, everybody run, and everybody hide. Quickly now. Hurry. IT is happening now. All run run run” In haste the message spoke. Radiating booming voice from the tissue box placed in the middle of...

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"Imagination is as imagination does."
-- a poet of a truly handsome imagination

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On every "Help! Oh, help! I'm in a Pickle!" Pickle Day,
Ms. Superhero Fancy one true super-duper fay
along with...

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Good King Wenceslas again
On the feast of Stephen
Saw the snow spread white and plain
Deep and crisp and even.
Afar a snowy hump in sight
Attracted his attention
Could it be that something might
Need royal intervention?

"Hither, page, and stand...

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I don’t have asbestos fingers and my blisters come from the garden
Toiling the soil and growing fine ingredients for such gourmet cuisine
Like ‘throw it all in the one pan dishes’ and crystal ball cooking galore
Never...

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A weasel wibble wobbling can be said to have ingested copious amounts of indemonstrable indelible ink today as it soared into doorways, hallways, cloakrooms, and buffet tables. Buffet tables are neither buffaloes or bongos. In...

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“Knock, knock” “Who’s there?”  I haven’t a clue
What day is it? Who’s at my door?
“Here is some breakfast I made just for you”
Says some stranger who slept on my floor
The sight of the eggs...

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It's a PICKLE PARTY and you're being invited!
Return your RSVP saying you'll be delighted
to attend. Don't forget to bring your sunscreen
so, you can keep your lovely shade of green.

The pool will be open, so you...

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Split pickle, sliced pickle, crisp pickle, knife
All in the jar planning the night of their life

Paul pokes a pinky in, eyeing his snack,
But this time the gherkins decide to fight back

They jump out and land...

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Well wobbling around in a pear tree dressed in a space suit can be very very dangerous. You might fall. And fallings are failings and failings flay the flesh from even the smallest atom that...

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Bread and Butter showed up first, 
thank God, with bread and butter 
(we hadn't any food out yet).
They had flown in from Detroit
on a real time-crunch.

Then the Gherkins arrived
Pushing through and eating
Half the sourdough and...

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A Passel of People Participated from all Portions of the nation.
The Purpose - To Promulgate the Pickle Pickers and Packers Association!
Parsimonious President Dill Presented a Pretty Powerful oration,
To Pitch a Passionate Plan for their Prestigiious...

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How grateful I shall ever be for the creative gal or guy,
Who concocted and perpetuated the luscious "punkin" pie!
Ah! The thought of a golden "punkin" pie with flaky crust,
Stimulates my taste buds with sinful epicurean...

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STRANGE BEDFELLOWS

What strange bedfellows this alien, and I make 
But, it was really just a matter of give and take

I'd read a book, he; forever watching the stars
He, could never really takes his eye off...

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When the chequered pattern of plain wallpaper catches your eye a budgie can perform a backflip whilst eating a cucumber. It is wise to use a stapler to fasten a knot in a ceiling beam....

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QUIRKS

I once had a friend long time past 
Who was wont to always break his fast
On cornflakes not with honey and milk
But pickled onions, gherkins and their ilk

Now if that’s not a quirk I’ll eat...

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No bash so far, beats the one in the jar
Emcee DJ Green spins for the jarstar 
No ill will to spill, just dancing on dill
When the lid comes off it’s an open bar!

So relish your...

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Planning on a birthday treat for my man;
from Polish descent, I’ll do what I can.
The rollmops was just one of his vices.
One bruises with rolling pin the spices:
juniper berries, allspice, cloves. Sieves
peppercorns mashed with freshly...

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I saw you there on dew kissed green beneath a the shading oak
no masters hand could emulate the beauty of each stroke
in sunlight dappled glory you turned with Elven grace
as sunlight’s sweet benevolence adorned your...

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firkins and gherkins and whistles and shoes
cluster bombs, punji stakes, death in the news
choppers chattering
napalm splattering
a carpet bombed mind with asian war blues

cracked vinyl records and medals unworn
black and white photo, ex-soldier unshorn
wheeling chair
graying hair
a...

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HAD ENOUGH
I have had enough of gherkins, they not give me windSo I've taken the gherkins and chucked "em in the bin 
I have had enough of gherkins, they not give me windSo I've taken...

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Pickled like gherkins in vinegar

Crystallised forever in sugar

Set and translucently Jellied ...

Hung like smoked, salted meat

Pigments crushed from earth
brushes from fine animal hair

Is it because they freeze
the sitter's image which

survived as the best image 
of...

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