Long Feeling blue Poems
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Written tonuhalan10/4/06 mon
Sad and blue
there are some times when your feeling sad and blue
there are some times when you don’t know what to dooo
don’t even know
don’t even know
don’t even know
there are someways
when your going
what your going through
and I don’t even know how to survive in this place im going into
there are some times
you don’t know what’s going on
there are some times when you feel so sad and blue
don’t even know
don’t even know
know know know
and you might of found him
and you don’t know what to say
your playing out to all those people in this place
there are beings from outer space
and you don’t know what to do
as you see the colors
behind your eyes
there’s nothing else to make you blue
I don’t even know don’t even know
don’t even know know more
as you feel the beat
and going through the floor
there’s nowhere out there in the summer
there’s know one in the rain
and you don’t even know
and you don’t even know
and your going out into the frame
there are places that I have been to
and there are things that I like to do
there are ways to make you feel Written and sung by Sean McMahon randy
Joseph on 19/03/06 on /19/03/06/
and to make you feel so new
like the speed its making me higher
don’t know if im on fire
fire is the burning desire to make your father new
I haven’t seen my father since I was five years old
writer playing on the stage
and don’t know what he is looking for
got his bottle of whiskey in his hand got a smoke in the other one
don’t even know don’t even know
know one
I put it out in another place like my father told me it was great
but I never saw my granddaddy die
I was like seven years old I was running on and through
and there’s nowhere out here on a rainbow and the sunshine got me through
and the grass is green and the trouble on the field and the falling of the sun
vocalization of somewhere out there and I have just begun
and there’s now more out here in the summer
there’s know where in the rain
and if your playing that then im coming alone
and your going to feel the pain
going feel the pain
pain
there are some times when your feeling blue
Sung by
Sean randy Joseph McMahon/written in text on /19/03/06/
Form:
Dedicated to all Soup poets and muse - please continue to help and thank you.
I didn’t know how to write poetry as I was new,
only 6 months in the poetry game so no shame,
many a day after writing I was feeling blue,
I thought I was stupid and everybody was to blame.
Met amazing people here and their care is free,
apparently it’s a rhyming thing or not,
it was driving me up the bloody tree,
thanks to all the positive input I got.
I now know more or less what is required,
I tried “Monoku” oh my, what a mess I made,
struggling to write at work almost got fired,
I was so embarrassed, under my desk I laid.
I tried to write a “Haiku”, I cant even say the word,
but nevertheless I tried, what a load of pooh,
valuable comments but almost meant how absurd,
I know why poets go crazy, and what they go through
I tried to write a “Kimo”, hey whatever,
what the hell is that supposed to mean,
but stuck to my guns and did endeavour,
produced what I thought was clever and clean.
I tried to write a “Verse”, was told to call it that,
submitted to contest, no comments, but N/A, again,
like I was talking to a stranger and saying sorry you just spat,
re-looked at my poems, I’m too stupid to give up and I’m vain.
I tried to write a “Sonnet” about my new sweetheart,
apparently it has only fourteen lines and limited syllables,
took so long she almost left me with a new broken heart,
no fuel in my car, and all the McDonald bills.
I tried to write a “limerick” an apparent popular form,
this is supposed to be funny have rhythm and rhyme,
previously for me anything that rhymed was the norm,
for that my English teacher should be smacked for his crime.
Finally I realised that its not just poetry but expressing life,
all you appreciate, love, you find funny and even hate,
your inner feelings, emotions, caring and your strife,
the special people on this site that help and patiently rate.
Now I do endure to write, and appreciate all and thank all,
for their positive input and renaming my form appropriately,
If my poem does not make it in any way or at all,
I don’t care because I am learning and will continue patiently.
Yes I do know the form is supposed to be "Rhyme" not "I do not know" - that is one of the intentions of the poem
Form:
Hush mom said
She told me to be quiet
To not make a sound Cause daddy was sleeping
And I didn't want to wake the beast.
Because when the beast is awoken…
It was like a tornado and a hurricane mashed into one
Terrorizing the whole house making it shake like a earthquake
Hush big brother said
He told me to hush when he broke the vase that held the memory
of our beloved grandmother "Don't worry " he said
"everything will be ok"
Yet at the end of the day
I was the one that got beat black and blue for it
And all he got was a stern talking too
Where's the justice in that?
Please tell me which part of that was ok?
I guess i should have read between the lines
Hush sister said
She told me to be quiet when I saw her sneaking out
She had the smile of devil that was planning on dying
I begged and pled that she stayed
She just looked into my eyes and said with the softest of voice
“One day i'll understand and she'll be there to stop me”
Then out the door she went. Sneaking off…
Like a cat in the night with one last saying…
I'll be back in a flash… which turned out to be a lie
Now I stand over her grave
I begged and pled
I prayed and prayed for her not to walked out the door into
The cold, dark and heartless night
But no.. a bang and then a boom followed with a crash
Here's her body…. Now six feet under
Hush dad said
He told me to stay quiet when he was in my room at night
He whispered everything would be ok...
That he was just showing me something new
Yet at the end.... I was the one feeling blue…
I played there covered in filth... disgusted with myself!
I cried and cried and cried but did you care…..
No! You didn't! What was that you told me at the end?! O yeah… You said….
“I was daddy’s good little girl.”
You told me to hush about this..
That if I didn't hush….
You would make me hush….
Hush the voices said
As I sat on the end of my bed crying to myself
I thought about all the things that I didn't say
I kept quiet because everyone told me to
And now I am broken... A shell of a person
The voices tell me everything will be ok
And as I took my final breath.....
Everything..... Was ok.... For I.... Was hushed.... For good
Never forget me
Do forgive me
Or I’ll be a valueless memory
You’ll feel my pain…
You’ll be the one rotting…
I’m screaming:
“Water me! Water me!”
But you’ll refuse to see
That I’m starving for your courtesy
That I’m yearning to be satisfied …possibly
Nourish me…like a thirsty tree
Begging for a superb growth experience
Despite the expense…
I’m in between
The beginning and end…how can I make progress?
When I’m shrouded in infirmity
The happiness…has abandoned me for good–
What is there to do, God?
What is there to look forward to?
What is there to see, Lord?
What is there to achieve? Secure me with your great sword
I’m powerless…I’m insecure like an orphan
Ignored… I forlorn…thrown out like an inkless pen
You left me in your debris…or was it my fault
That I’m drowning…suffocating…
You’d do me a great favor and save me
For heaven’s sake…
My life’s at stake…
My life’s close to its demise…
My joyous life – I don’t recognize…
I’m in between
Sorrow and assurance…could this day get any worse–
To my misfortune, the day is still carrying on
But I won’t worry about it… I’ll just wait until my might
Shines on like the dawn
I’m actually making progress
Somewhat…but time is running out
But you left me in the cold…without any blankets
You’re cruel…you know what I’m talking about
I’m choking on grime…
There’s not enough time…
There’s not much time to spare…
Spare my life…
Don’t give them a piece of your rage…don’t you dare
Blame them for the strife
That drags you down to hell –
Is that where your heart dwells?
I’m in between
Life and death…
Will this second be my last breath?
Will this day give birth to my future triumph?
What do you mean I’m in the brink of success?
Does this poem make any sense?
What’ll be the expense?
I’m in between
I’m left on the shelves…
Untouched…unseen…
You’re so mean…
Don’t you dare
Leave me with your debt
I’m in between
Love and hate
You left me in the margins…
Why am I placed in this hectic state?
Which feeling am I the closest to?
You’ll just have to figure it out yourself…
I wish you knew…I wish you knew…
How much I loved you…
Now, I’ve changed my mind about you…
I’m through with you…
You made me soak in your rue
Your rue…your guilt…your remorse…
Sticks to me like glue
I’m through with you…
I’m sick of feeling blue : ' /
Form:
You took me so far from myself, that I forgot who I was
A stranger looked back at me in my own mirror
I heard a little girl crying inside, but yet I couldn’t see her
What was that shadow under my dress?
Daddy’s little girl, singing a song, “You ought to been there when the Lord saved me.”
I sang well, yet I was still waiting to be saved…
Don’t you all see me, drowning in hurt being strangled by darkness?
What was that shadow under my dress?
Daddy, daddy, daddy… But you’re my daddy
Fathers sell not your daughters as whores, for if you do your nation will be turned to
Whoredom…
Daddy, daddy, daddy… But you’re my daddy
What was that shadow under my dress?
Being led around by darkness bound by the invisible leash of my innocence
Nothing was the name that he gave me…
If you love me you won’t tell, was the silence of that song he played for me…
What was that shadow under my dress?
Reaching around in my world of darkness trying to find something, anything to hold on
to…
Beyond the point of feeling blue…
Each day, molestation was nothing new…
What was that shadow under my dress?
Asking what more do I have to take before being left alone…
Confusion choked me…
Why?, Was the only food I could eat…
Why didn’t anyone help me? Why was I left alone?
What was that shadow under my dress?
Taking a bath was like bathing in the lake of fire…
Red raw rashes, whips and lashes where the clothes that he gave me…
It was actually a relief when he only beat me by a tree…
What was that shadow under my dress?
Cursed from the day I was born, being taught before I could walk how to pose for
****…
My panties pink with flowers, being pulled off of my body every midnight hour…
Sexual deviance being sown into my DNA
Innocents told me, that’s just the way Daddy’s like to play
What was that shadow under my dress?
Time has passed and Daddy’s gone to and been released from Jail…
Over 22 years he was locked up a sexually violent predator civilly committed never
supposed to sleep outside of a jail cell…
Throughout my life those who have heard my story considered me blessed…
Yet I still struggle and pray one day I can truly understand what that shadow was
under my dress…
Form:
(V. 1) I’m so irresponsible,
But you’re gorgeous and irreplaceable
I don’t know how to let go
I don’t know where to go…
I shouldn’t leave behind my past totally
I don’t know how to let go of things
The pains of the past hunts me down again
I’m on my own and I’m sore to the core
I implore you to let go of me! Let go of me!
Let go of me now!! Set me free from bondage and captivity!
Feelin’ like I need a slap in the face literally!
*chorus*
The mountain winds are howling its stormy resentment
The snow glitters on the triumphant mountains…
I’ve tried to conceal these feelings of discontent
My eyes are spraying with tears of sorrow – weep no more, sad fountains
Don’t push me to the limits – I breathe in and out
I let go of my anxiety and trade it with prosperity–
I’m one with the passionate, frozen desires in my heart
I’m strong like Sampson in the bible –
Let the light of day unfreeze my heart’s agony and avarice
I don’t want to believe in those silly allegories…
Am I your living sacrifice?
My heart is as cold as ice…I need to take His advice!
I have faced reality alone before
Is this real or is this a myth? There’s more land to explore!
(V. 2) Dealin’ with a scatterbrained boy’s a job,
It’s like running a different race or realizing you’ve failed from the start
Not one took heart – I won’t let my eyes sob
I’ve painted you a dwelling place where you and I can escape
We can both escape from the worries of this world of woe,
Sinking in its self-indulgent greed and rolling in its death cart
Not one desired true love in his or her heart –
The abyss and the ebony skies clothed them all with one despondent cape
Hand me the duct tape!
Hand me the super glue!
I'll repair you...for you make me feel complete
Like my passionate, frozen desires...now, I can stand on both feet
I'll remain discreet until you rescue me and kiss me
I'll remain trapped in callous night...if you'll embrace me with glorious glee ! ! !
Let me fix you with my passionate, frozen miracles! I won’t push you out of shape!
Surprises are at every corner and every angle – you’ll see me gape!
I’m tired of feeling blue, knowing you for so long
Like a familiar, touching tune of a song
“I don’t have to ponder my precious moments that always give me heart to carry on.
So firmly implanted in my heart, I will never let them go, never will they be gone.” The Poet
Memories of : As a child my Dad’s beautiful voice filled our home with song, and Mum so often beckoned me to get up and dance and we would waltz around the house.
It was time to paint the house and I was given the choice of colour for my room. I chose a deep dark rose pink.
When Dad finished it and it dried, is was quite a light pastel pink. Although I smiled, he saw the look in my eyes. He told me he was going to give it a much darker coat. He painted the whole room again in just the colour I hoped for. I was ten and Dad was sixty, and I will never forget the trouble he went to that day just to please me.
My dear Lord heard our prayers one night as our adult son lay on an operating table with 19 fractures in his skull with pressure and splinters pushing into his brain. God gave two surgeons miraculous hands, taking nearly five hours to free his brain and reform his skull with metal plates and screws as best they could to save him. Our son came through all this with no permanent brain damage and eventually recovered.
My wonderful Granddaughter gave me a card 14 years ago, that when it is opened, has The Platters singing ONLY YOU, and quite incredibly the battery in it hasn’t worn out yet. She told me that she chose that card because the words reminded her exactly of me. To read this certainly created another precious moment.
When I am feeling blue, I just think of my wonderful family, that I am so very lucky to have, and I open that card, which always brings tears of joy to me. I think of the young boy who I pray for every day. He saw me drop a fifty dollar note in the street and ran after me (a complete stranger) to give it back.
To cheer me up I go to his pages and read some of Rico’s Limericks.
It wont mean much to the readers of this, but to me, I have just filled this page with more love and wonderful memories than I need to make me feel like the most lucky and loved person in the world.
People are, constantly, selfishly numbering their troubles endlessly
While you are listening to them patiently and hopelessly
They write elegies describing unrequited love, themselves,
Their pain, feeling blue,
But this elegy is only for you-
Everyone is writing sad poems, and self-centered, too
However, my poem is devoted to violence, to violence against you
Today, I saw a dead bird on the road
Its death made me see again this horror,
It left me to endure humiliation, over and over again-
To watch faces, innumerable, impersonal, coarse, covetous faces,
Who rush every morning to destroy you
Haste, hatred and indifference are jostling down the streets
Crazed women are shopping, peeking into shop windows greedily,
Throwing away papers and bills on the sidewalk
Some men are drinking and smoking in a tavern
Cigarette smoke, trivial conversations
Erase and kill everything, even love is contaminated
By the touch of their dirty fingers
Chimneys and cars are turning the air into smelly haze
Snarling machines, squeaky sirens
Override chirping of birds and children`s laughter
Gardens made of plastic bags bloom on the river banks
The souls of dead swans are floating on grey lakes,
Enclosed by sadness of poets
The sea is bleeding, bringing waste back on the sand
And you are crying over the man,
Who was a long, long time ago,
Clad in beauty and who is now dressed in wrecks
In your tears, I see the universe and despair of your silver companion
You are still spinning noiselessly,
Changed, old, wrapped in a shabby veil,
Your wrinkles, made of concrete roads and towers
Are becoming deeper and deeper, your gowns are worn-out
You are still spinning, persistently and compassionately,
Going nowhere, into the empty future
People are constantly, selfishly numbering their troubles endlessly
While you are listening to them, patiently and hopelessly
They write elegies describing unrequited love, themselves,
Their pain, feeling blue,
But this elegy is only for you-
Everyone is writing sad poems, and self-centered, too
However, my poem is devoted to violence, to violence against you
[Verse-1]
I watched you walk by yesterday, and yes again you turned and looked away
You never give me the time of day, and you're always looking sad and grey
A small piece of lace from your pink dress, is all that's left of you and me
Wish I could take back yesterday, when I went astray and set you free
I wish I could find the words to say, instead of making you look away
Oh! It's funny how a little piece of lace, makes me yearn for your embrace
[Verse-2]
I know that I still need your love, because my heart is always feeling blue
And I guess I'll never be the same, for playing around and being untrue
You gotta know this isn't what I wanted, cause now I'm always on my knees
But I can see how you like your freedom, of being with him and not with me
But baby a twist of fate's what tore us apart, and placed this look upon my face
Oh! it's still funny how a little piece of lace, makes me yearn for your embrace
[Chorus]
A piece of lace from your pink dress, keeps putting me down won't let me rest
And these cloudy skies are back today, holding my heart and soul at bay
I pray you come and take this lace, and wipe these tears from my face
Oh! It's funny how a little piece of lace, makes me yearn for your embrace
[Verse-3]
All those things that you used to do, is what made me fall in love with you
You gave me your all once upon a time, but like a fool I up and flew
And the things I went and said that day, made you fade and drift away
I never shoulda treated you that way, cause baby I need you here today
The sun keeps hiding behind the clouds, and all I do is sit and cry
And this piece of lace holds my heart at bay, I don't know...maybe it's a sign
[Chorus]
A piece of lace from your pink dress, keeps putting me down won't let me rest
And these cloudy skies are back today, holding my heart and soul at bay
I pray you come and take this lace, and wipe these tears from my face
Oh! It's funny how a little piece of lace, makes me yearn for your embrace
Oh! It's funny how a little piece of lace, makes me yearn for your embrace
What if tomorrow the sun suddenly stopped to burn
All the birds had flown away because they had forgotten their song
There were no more days only nights
And the world had stopped to turn
The ocean waves didn't roll or roar anymore
And kiss the shore
The mountains crumbled
And the stars fell like diamonds from the sky
Would you be there for me
And lay down by my side
If the sky never cried
And nothing grew the flowers no longer bloomed
Everyone else had gone except you and I
Is your love deep enough?
I'd like to know because when things get tough
Like they often do
And we feel like giving up
And the world becomes just like a big empty room
Money and riches are just paper that has no value no more
Our green land is a desert full of sand
And when life opened a door for us
We sometimes let the opportunities,
Slip like gold dust through the fingers of our hands
The home we built could become just an empty shack
That once would have been full of love so cosy and warm
Before there was a storm
On the other side of the railway tracks
Rusting trains at a standstill
And can no longer go forward or back
Pretty young beauty queens
All gone and be only seen
On the covers of glossy magazines
If there was no hope left
Wishful dreams never came true
As they did,for me and you
And you can no longer keep warm
When the earth grows cold
Have nowhere else to go
And there are no hands left to hold
Would you give me your hand holding on forever
Sometimes we forget what's wrong from right
But there's so much love and honesty
It has to be right
When you're lying next to me at night
It's so hard to live with no one by your side
No one to care for or care for you
You can't remember how many tears you've cried
And the icy treacherous road ahead
Makes you slip and slide
You can run all you want
But you can't find a place in which to hide
It's so hard to do
Especially when you're down
And feeling blue
As life and bad luck often do.
Peter Dome©2024.