Long Bloke Poems
Long Bloke Poems. Below are the most popular long Bloke by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Bloke poems by poem length and keyword.
After what has occurred...not for the absurd herds who truths have blurred & turds have stirred but for the nerds who once heard purred...
When things addle & are oh so bleak
Trump in the saddle havoc will wreak
Chagrin at mandarin a tangerine freak
Will straddle the raddled.. no mystique
Without a paddle in a proverbial creek
Quips make the pips of weak squeak
A foolish clique who damnation seek
Monstrosity such animosity at the meek
Avaricious & pernicious ghoulish streak
Pomposity of atrocity bare faced cheek
The velocity and the ferocity does reek
Mother nature’s fears she does shriek
Lachrymosity at sneers her tears leak
Boasts from fossil fuel ghosts still speak
On her death bed the hosts posts creak
Any generosity our curiosity does pique
Consideration of others makes us unique
Veneration of a tried & tested technique
Approbation for appreciation we can eke
Will freely admit that I am a bit of geek
Ardour for a lexicon larder I can tweak
Another peek tinker changes do sneak
Armada of rhymes for times so oblique
Are these poetic crimes need a critique
On a whim send to a hack at their peak
Bloke with bespoke flair a chic boutique
Tim with rare warmth of a teak antique
Love your vim cheers you made my week
p.s It's outrageous as the earth does bleed to be freed must be courageous plead we maybe vexatious but need to be tenacious fight each sh*te jibe from Trump the chump's mendacious & rapacious diatribe... ta muchly to the gracious & vivacious Tim Hayward our sagacious & loquacious scribe who indeed does sow the seed to feed our good greed with his bodacious even salacious vibe & creed.. the go to for our voracious & audacious tribe...a breed who just love to imbibe..(don't be so cynical there's no bribe...me being veracious so use your swede.. pay heed make sure you read & subscribe)
the thing about addictions is i beat them
so take your put downs turn em around and eat them
you steer clear
all look at me up here
looking down at a reality that you frankly fear
and i know I've been up on that high horse
nice and safe protected like a highness
to then the turtle that swims and then the tortoise with wings
you live in a shell whilst i wear armour
you abide by laws and don't do things through psychology it'll harm ya
well I'm harder, you avoid the aggro and i'm viagra
stand up and topple walls whilst you throne with tucked in balls
and what will shock ya is i beat addictions without a doctor
I'm Winehouse but living, saying no no no
cus my doubt's not driven, saying so so so
cus i can chalk lines, smoke weed at bed time
and then it's no no no,
lager or wine this bloke says it's time to
go go go,
so you can judge with prejudice in you
presumptuous without a damn clue
you don't know know know
and i'll get addicted enjoy it restrict it
claus saying ho ho ho
you're just Santa at Christmas,
everyday
do you get pissed much?
use caffeine for short blasts,
everyday
but not stupid enough for drugs you can't hook and throw back
cus these drugs get you and you're stuck like that
World has gotten far too awake,
Fancy gender issues to rake.
Sex, a matter of choice,
One follows inner voice,
As suits self choice, one bakes one’s cake.
A non-binary brick
Has broken old rubric—
One male-female that goes to make,
And woke, a brand new bloke,
Out, old order to choke,
Suffers deep slumber and can’t wake.
_____________________________________
Happenings |11.04.2024| Limerick, humour
Poet’s note: J K Rowling of Harry Potter faces a prospect of arrest in Scotland for having said: Many a transgender actually is man under the dress. But if Western World is so 'woke' as to suffer from chronic insomnia, India seems its Polar opposite, comparable to say Rip Van Winkle who slept for twenty years, or Kumbhakarna of Ramayana who used to sleep six months in a year. The last line of this ditty alludes to this fact.
More'n nine months on...
and still I feel infuriated at myself
concerning squandered funds
passively, senselessly, and willingly
surrendered nest egg
to computer hackers
(imposters, jackknifing, and liquidating)
coercing me to forfeit funds,
whereby yours truly (me) blindsided
thru convincing telephonic dialogue
witnessing unquestioned trust
I unquestioningly, unerringly, and unblinkingly
carried out instructions
essentially cadging, depleting, and exhausting,
checking and savings accounts (mine)
courtesy convincing scheme
yoking naïveté (mine)
with FAKE conspiratorial claims
Citizens Bank tellers
linkedin as thieving magpies
(twittering bird brain analogy
hatched courtesy yours truly – me)
once ridiculous ruse beak came obvious,
I never ceased
maligning self as half cracked egghead
repeatedly replaying telephonic scenario
only this time
with home grown perspicacity triumphant
and fraudsters, marauders, and usurpers
harangued, interrogated, and jailed
critiqued, maligned, and whipped
courtesy just law of the land.
Clear as day,
I still recall the bloke
who chose one alias
(probably quite a few
in his bag of tricks)
videlicet Harvey Specter,
he coaxed at least one poor sucker
(the writer of these words)
to fork over his life savings
without yours truly batting an eye,
whose gullibility now legion
among the posse of scoundrels
sharing the ease with which
money plucked out figurative fingers
(like taking candy from a child)
diminishing paucity of integrity,
increasing perspicacity of acuity,
where wool will never
be pulled over my eyes
(ewe can bet my bottom dollar)
against being fleeced,
and now a heightened awareness
a wretched costly life lesson
inflicting a painful financial contusion
additionally severely wrecking, pummeling,
and bruising psyche suddenly woke
keenly alert to the bad to the bone
doggone wicked wily weasel ways
of unrepentant rapscallions.
Heaven help
The unfortunate bloke
Who got caught
By a big Jim joke
I heard laughing voices and wondered why
Then surfaced from gonk under open sky
Didn’t take very long to understand it
In the cookhouse queue still in my pit
Now in those days I slept in the raw
(Not these days, not any more)
Grabbed a blanket grabbed a sheet
Scooted off on my bare feet
Mustering any the dignity I could find
And showing all my bare behind
The girls all laughed for weeks and weeks
With jokes about my dimpled cheeks
And nobody knew how I got there
And by and by I didn’t care
And when Big Jim shook my hand
I forgot any revenge that I had planned
For I could see the funny side
Of my embarrassing sleepy ride
And I drank his beer in its stead
And ever after wore keks in bed
Heaven help
The unfortunate bloke
Who got caught
By a Big Jim joke
INDUSTRY OF CHRISTMAS
Cut down the pine! That one’s for me.
Lovely needles — so fresh and free.
A s p r i t z of h o l i d a y esprit.
O Christmas tree! O Christmas tree!
Harness him with silver bell rows -
Dear Rudolph, master of blind-snow.
In dark W i n t e r, oh how it glows.
A red-red nose! A red-red nose!
While we repose, he rides the chutes,
Working, down the chimney he scoots.
S a n t a in his h o l i d a y s u i t
And fur-lined boots! And fur-lined boots!
A m e r r y, smiling, k i n d l y bloke,
Loves with great fervor the poor folk.
Smells of cookies, milk and nog yolk.
And chimney smoke! And chimney smoke!
Elves polish the sleigh and explore.
Dear old S a n t a, as their mentor,
Jumps in and teaches them to soar.
With gifts galore! With gifts galore!
12/2/2017
Monotetra Form
Snow White’s vain and wicked stepmother
And her weakling of a father
Forced her with seven dwarfs to live
Whom all her love and attention she’d give
She’d love to get the jewels they’d bring
And wore them round her neck on the string
But when the prince kissed her and woke
She agreed to ride away with the bloke
But soon she started terribly to miss
The seven dwarfs who were such bliss
She remembered the days she would lie around
While the dwarfs would clean up without a sound
She longed for the love of seven men
Who’d keep her well fed in their den
So back she came with a lot of joy
With a promise to soon return for her baby boy
Inspiried by the fairy tale-Snow White and the seven Dwarfs.
Oh please for the sake (and sock e)
of brethren deemed friendly, i be
see-ch ye with genuine humility
to desist launching nuclear missiles.
This American bloke put his lock,
stock and barrel of gunmetal faith
in mister Dennis Rodman to serve
as a figurative lightning rod against
any aggressive actions that would
set in motion the end of civilization.
Not only would the majority of homo
sapiens (yes, some clusters of earth-
linked yahoos might still remain a
live) suffer a nasty, short and brutish
death, but also other flora and fauna
could be equally annihilated. Under
stand able, those grievances against
sanctions against the populace of north
Koreans (who most likely experience
unfair hardship) fuels resentment against
the hegemony of western powers. Many
of these societies authoritatively bran
dish their devout pledge for concurrence
with democratic principles. Any endemic
protestations declaiming objection to
the American way affect an immediate
alarm. Imposition of so called "puppet"
regimes get forcibly installed those
countries leaders who run counter to
capitalistic productivity. This one anon
a muss citizen of those fifty states also
takes umbrage how might of american
to predominate and demand that other
nations follow suit solely based on what
agrees with those like minded in power
sans the brotherhood/sisterhood of vast
swaths of the global population. No
great expectations (by dickens) to affect
passionate sentiments per those pea
poles somewhat hermetically sealed
off and separated (viz - by the demilitarized
zone) from the billions of other human
beings. Thy sole missive from one older
mwm dreads locked linkedin catastrophic
chain reaction of events once atomic war
fare triggered by the disgruntlement over
some differences in outlook could possibly
resolved via "active listening" and access
to exchange a word of reconciliation. As
one flawed chap prone to his own bouts
of anger, he attests that more positive plea
sing results can prevails with the treat of
world war three diffused in a manner that
plays less havoc once unleashing of weapons
of mass destruction occurs!
Form:
O'er the years we've done and seen so much stuff,
And since I'm the family's self-appointed history buff,
I've collected things in many a tattered old scrap book,
Hoping future generations might enjoy taking a nostalgic look!
There are programs and photos signed by many an eminent bloke,
Recalling pleasant events and memories that such things evoke.
Even a yellowing copy of my old school grades report;
My less than stellar accomplishments will surely induce some sport!
Birthday, anniversary and valentine cards by the dozens,
From my spouse, children and legions of long-forgotten cousins.
Also, there are certificates and other awards the kids have won,
Honored for their fortitude and the hard work they had done!
Pages and pages almost too numerous to mention,
Contain memorabilia from many a boring convention.
Included are newspaper accounts of many a family episode,
Births, deaths, weddings and for a myriad of accolades bestowed!
There are reminders of trips thro' many foreign lands,
But the most precious are the things made by my kids' tiny hands;
Simple valentine and birthday cards for Mom and Dad,
Proudly presented with glowing faces and all the love they had!
Robert L. Hinshaw, CMSgt, USAF, Retired
(© All Rights Reserved)
Courtesy the mighty Amazon successful deliverance reported...
Regarding unexpected Gadshill gift
(as if delivered from Magi)
tamper proof wrapped,
thus an obligation goads me
to communicate following
trademarked™ poetically apt
reasonable rhyme capped
with feeble airborne attempt,
no matter arms waved futilely,
madly, and ridiculously flapped
fortunately I eluded being kidnapped
by men in white coats
spellbound and rapt
before arriving at 20965 Young Avenue
Bend, Oregon 97703-8461
without energy being zapped.
The abovementioned transmission to whit
hesitantly, yet immediately, wisely scuttled
cuz analogous to Icarus, a free spirit
ignoring Daedalus warning soaring
too close to the sun
earning stronger epithet than "you nit"
true to adolescent hubris,
the son blithely ignoring
his father as a hypocrite,
but honest to goodness truthfulness
of above line entails
caution and discretion I readily admit.
Just now, I sample
Navitas Organics blueberry
hemp power snack(s)
wondering how many chewy squares
yours truly needs to consume
before me noggin
goes wickety wickety wack,
but... just maybe amply ingested
cubed plant based superfood
could allow, enable and
provide me means to take flight,
whereby off gray carpeted tarmac
goes Matthew Scott Harris.
So best be on the lookout okey doke
for one nondescript buzzfeeding bloke
long haired pencil necked geek fella,
who juiced awoke
and suddenly found himself at Trader Joe's
(with a twenty dollar gift card)
among garden variety generic folk
such as special people spanning Costco calendar,
who sport and trumpet surnames such as
Dunning, Harris, McGeehan no joke,
yet amidst madding crowd there could be
spy versus spy donning dagger and cloak.
anyway hoop fully thee above laughter did evoke,
perhaps e'en yar own literary juices
I didst unwittingly stoke.