Long Announcement Poems
Long Announcement Poems. Below are the most popular long Announcement by PoetrySoup Members. You can search for long Announcement poems by poem length and keyword.
WHO IS JACK SCHITT?
The lineage is finally revealed.
Many people are at a loss for a response when someone says,
"You don't know Jack Schitt."
Now you can intellectually handle the situation.
Jack is the only son of Awe Schitt and O. Schitt.
Awe Schitt, the fertilizer magnate married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt Inc. They had one son, Jack.
In turn Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt and the deeply religious couple had 6 children: Holie Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Giva Schitt, Bull Schitt and the twins, Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt.
Against her parents objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high school drop out.
After 15yrs. of marriage, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced.
Noe Schitt later remarried Ted Sherlock and because her kids were living with them she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt-Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt and they produced a son of nervous disposition, Chicken Schitt.
Two other of the 6 children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt who were inseparable throughout childhood subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the Schitt-Happens wedding. The Schitt-Happens children were: Dawg, Byrd and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world and recently returned home from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
So now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt." , you can correct them because you most certainly do.
FAMILY HISTORY RECORDED BY CROCK O. SCHITT INC.
Form:
At the announcement of your presence
My blood ran like the sounds of hell were chasing them
Causing my heart to beat faster out of fear
Yet, at the sight of your handsomeness
My soul suddenly becomes peaceful
At the sound of your voice
Like in the midst of the sounds of angels
My heart rejoices
As though it were listening to the song of the angels
Little did I know I would soon be engulfed in perilous darkness
That your mischievous smile
Will soon turn a burning frown
That those hands, soothing as soft clouds
Will soon descend upon my face
Turn my sexy lingerie into rags
And leave painful marks all over my erogenous zones
I am left to wonder everyday
What changed?
Because…
You are definitely not the man I married
The T.V. Set is blaring, as usual for it is the law to keep it on.
Year 2035, and the gatekeepers need to watch people twenty-five six.
Yes, I know it used to be twenty-four, seven, but the ghouls recalculated.
There are fourteen months now too; twelve was not enough.
Announcement: Researchers say that thirty-percent of world is blind and deaf.
I stare at the T.V. set. Surely that figure is too low.
I think of all the people I know who cannot see the truth
Even after it climbs into their laps and bites them on the nose.
Preferring to believe the experts of their favorite stations over their observations.
At least fifty-six percent of the population is deaf.
For I have seen all the mothers in the grocery store not doing a thing
While their children yell, scream, swear, and torment other shoppers.
It might be sixty-six percent. Think of all those fathers at the ball games
Who must not be able to hear their own words as they scream stupidity at the coach.
Announcement: Seventy percent of the world are mad.
This propaganda is getting way out of hand. I know only one person who is not mad.
She sticks her tongue out at the T.V. set and puts her foot through it.
ALERT! ALERT! Destroyer at 627 Hemlock Street! Destruction of Government Property!
They haul me out for hanging three seconds later.
waiting
with diaper on
for this woman to get up
off the kitchen floor and
stop bleeding while a man
hovers over her with grimace
and clinched fist
waiting
for our first-grade teacher
to stop crying
over the P.A. announcement
that the president
has just been assassinated
in Dallas
waiting
on the spirit of Christmas
to return days after the news
that mother's favorite song "You Send Me"
had just been shot and killed
a few blocks from our home
waiting
in the backseat of a Packard
for the policeman to stop screaming
at my father as urban soldiers
toss fire from their hands
in our neighborhood just outside of Watts
waiting
at LAX for Wilt the Stilt
to come back and finish
signing autographs after
some idiot just called him a freak
waiting
for the bowtie and scowl
to let go of my arm so I
can shake the hand of
the Greatest of All Time
as he starts his comeback
with an exhibition bout
in East Los Angeles
waiting
with eighteen-year-old trembling knees
for that sheriff deputy
to remove his pump action shotgun
from my temple
waiting
in the delivery room
for the wrong woman
to have my child
waiting
at a motel
for the right woman
to find the time
to slip away
waiting
on the side of
the ninety-one freeway
for a motorcade to pass
shortly after the funeral
of a former president
shamed by the Watergate scandal
waiting
and looking
while holding onto
the entry gate at 875 S. Bundy Dr.
for some sign of what really
happened that night
waiting
along with F.E.M.A. and the Red Cross
for the distraught woman
to come with us to safety
days after the Northridge earthquake
leveled her million-dollar home
waiting
at the hospital
for my first grandchild
to be born while her father
who's been convicted of battery
is nowhere to be found
waiting, waiting
seems like I'm always
waiting
THE ANNOUNCEMENT OF WINTER, IS A SIGN,
OF WHAT OLD MAN WINTER, HAS IN MIND.
OLD MAN WINTER IS UNBELIEVABLY KEEN,
CHECK OUT HIS HISTORY TO SEE WHAT I MEAN.
HE SETS US UP TO THINK ALL IS WELL.
THEN UNLEASHES A BLIZZARD FROM HELL.
WE SHOVEL THE SNOW AND CLEAR THE STREETS.
AFTER A DAY HE DUMPS THREE MORE FEET.
HE WILL MAKE IT SNOW FOR A VERY WHITE CHRISTMAS.
IN HIS OWN WORDS "YOU DON'T WANT TO MISS THIS"
HE DELIVERS JOY FOR THE SNOWBOARDER TYPE,
BUT AT 12,000 FEET IT'S A FIGHT FOR YOUR LIFE.
BACK IN THE CITY IT'S FREEZING COLD,
QUITE THE HAZARD, FOR THE WEAK AND THE OLD.
JUST OFF THE LAKE , IT WAS FORTY BELOW.
EFFECTS OF THE WINDCHILL OR SO WE ARE TOLD.
DOWN FROM THE NORTH AND ACROSS THE PLAINS,
WHITEOUT CONDITIONS ARE PURELY INSANE.
OLD MAN WINTER LOVES FREEZING RAIN.
IT'S HIS WAY OF INFLICTING PAIN.
FROM TIME TO TIME WE JUST DON'T KNOW,
WHAT IS MEANT BY COLD WET SNOW.
JUST FOR KICKS HE LIKES TO TAKE DOWN TREES,
BY FREEZING RAIN AND ASSERTING A BREEZE.
NEVER, NEVER, CALL OLD MAN WINTER A *****.
YOU'LL FIND YOURSELF, OFF THE ROAD IN A DITCH.
I watched the “news” this morning.
Chicken Little ran around squawking
Two women talked amiably after describing
scenes of horrific violence.
A homeless puppy was found
cared for and now needs a “forever” home.
Thousands called in looking to adopt it.
A homeless veteran was stepped over
in the entrance to a shelter
he/she was not cared for or allowed entrance.
Three kittens sang “Jingle Bells”
Chicken Little squawked a bit more
Climate change, global warming yadayada
The weather persons told me of storms
in the Midwest, floods in the south and
high temps in Arizona….
I had to look out my window
to get the weather report here.
The station manager made a Public Service Announcement.
Paraphrased : “If you’d all just do as you’re told
everything would be just fine”.
(the commercials were for Erectile disfunction, tampons,
birth control and condoms….oh….and childrens breakfast cereal))
John G. Lawless
1/4/2022
Looking back at our dying earth through windows of hope and despair
It's hard to imagine our planet within hours will be barren and bare
All we take are our memories from a place so rich in compare
To outer yonder we travel, all on-board for a future to share
We are the chosen few, to lead mankind to a distant world
Recalling the days when we dreamt, in comics being told it's absurd
We witness the seas being angry, like they have never been witnessed before
Eruptions abound in plenty, seeing the tearing of earth's crust, now sore
Picturing cities where we resided, all we see are crimsoned orange reds
So free as we venture to anew, containing images of our now forgotten dead
Our once beautiful sphere, now decrepit in battle scarred sit
In the distance it shall always remain, knowing that we were part of it
As I look around this ship, ironically Discovery is it's name
Hoping history will again repeat itself, allowing us humans an honourable claim
~*~
Days seem like months even years yet it can only be hours since we left
I for one can't comprehend as to the devastation leaving a planet so reft
The distance that we can travel in space, remains unbelievable in ones thoughts
It's what lies out there now that worries, can humanity be brought back from nought
An announcement over the speakers now heard, co-ordinates that were set have been reached
No religion will ever again divide man, or it's hatred to ever again be preached
We are now witnessing our new world, captured by the Hubble's wondrous lens
The scientists told us of valleys, and magnificent Scottish like glens
Blue azure skies resonate, amidst cotton wool clouds in sporadic drift
Suddenly a shaking, a severe vibrating as we head into a left angled shift
Unknown grounds grow ever nearer, panic stricken confused scared and crying
To this alien land we die like our planet, evolution can now stop trying
http://www.thehighlanderspoems.com/fantasy-19.php
This here is a public service announcement so listen close
I mind my business
walk thru life looking thru my own scope
I'm a believer of ying & Yang
as the ancient philosophers preached
"as above, so it is below"
I vibe high as well as low depending on my mood
so if my energy ain't for you
your presence from mine is what you might wanna excuse
my spirit and my tongue is absolute
so it's a rarity if you see me doing a one eighty
I'm far from obtuse I can't and won't dilute the pure me
trust me you couldn't walk a block in these boots
so here's a 21 gun salute to everybody who didn't make the cut
I wish you nothing but the best
but allegedly this is the fifth dimension
nothing is what it seems so everything is up for discussion
Write a comment...
Smug Cat was excited to be alone in her hot human's house.
She could hear whatever she needed to hear, including a mouse.
There was a gentle rain outside, which made her happier yet.
She was the luckiest non-human today the most joyful pet!
She commandeered the house, it was hers to do as she wished.
Heard some wipers outside, they made melodies as they swished.
Her eyes began to close, and she relaxed onto her queenly bed.
She had not had this kind of relaxation since the announcement was read.
It is a boy! Hooray! Hooray! A baby boy born today!
She did not like this new kid, he always got in her way.
He got served first, and his milk looked better.
He was always snuggling into mommy’s sweater.
A car door slammed. They were back!
She was now again on the “look at this cute baby” track!
Now that’s MAJOR!
MAJOR is an Important word.
MAJOR is a word we have no choice but to appreciate. It is a word of strength.
It is very Powerful and it stands out above other words.
There are sooo many meanings and ways to use the word MAJOR, and so many ways we have seen the impact of the word MAJOR.
Let’s talk about it.
There’s a Major Announcement
Major Improvements
Major Moves
Major Delays
Major Updates
Major Source
Major Part
Major League
Major Heart Attack
Major Difference
Major Hurricane
Major Damage
Major Accident
Major Blow
Major Influence
Major Surgery
Major Payne (lol)
Major Mistake
Major Changes
Major Decision
Major Upset
Major Problems
Major Categories
Major Accomplishments
Major (my son)
Major Endurance
Major Qualifications
Major Research
Major Disaster
Major Step
Major Factor
Major Question
Major Topic
Major Features
Major Milestone
Major (rank in military)
Major Affect
Major Complications
Major Role
Major Event
Major Achievement
Major (study in college)
Major Impact
Major Competition
Major Success
Major Vibes
Major Key
Major Breakthrough
Majorette
Drum Major…
Yeah, it’s a lot. So now that you see how impactful MAJOR is and the different ways we have experienced the meaning of MAJOR in our lives, tell me, what’s your MAJOR?