Many years ago in business as a wellness consultant
to clients I would explain , how their most unwellness state,
was linked to pollution and other earthly degradation
It was then I'd sometimes hear you're a hippy and a greenie
that was their responsive exhortation
My retort, Thank you for that keenly measured observation
I'm am proud that over time I have improved my state of being
many deliberate choices have been made
You can now remunerate me for my expertise
I'm always grateful when time arrives for me to get paid
This is the weirdest night I’ve ever seen.
Said the crow, not realizing it is Halloween.
The jack-o-lantern said he felt it too.
Inside him was a big dragon concocting on “brew”.
The dragon popped his head out and gave them a fright.
It was getting to be a strange, curious, bat-loving night.
Dracula came by to get in on the October action.
Being the center of attention always gives him satisfaction.
But alas, the dragon was the “talk of the day”.
The graveyard was buzzing with rumors every which way.
This dragon is dangerous; he was transformed by a witch.
Greenie got excited and waved a feathery switch.
Abracadabra and Hocus Pocus and Such!
These graveyard jack-o-lanterns are almost too much!
Reporters came and everyone pushed Dracula aside.
He was so mad now, his feelings we could barely abide.
The dragon gave a show, a whistle and a shout.
The newspaper reporters were thrilled without a doubt.
Dracula slunk away, irritated and angry as could be.
The weirdest Halloween I’ve ever had on a dragon’s knee.
ENVIRONMENT BLUES
Extra, extra have you heard the news?
all the world has got environment blues
They’re moving through the forest and ripping up the trees
Swimming in the ocean means dodging the debris
Stop treating our world like a garbage bin
Let’s make it a place worth living in
Environment blues are sweeping the land
It’s up to me and you to lend a hand
Where are the children going to play?
To make a new tomorrow we have to start today
The people of Chernobyl are nuclear shy
The faces of the children make me want to cry
I saw on the news an oil spill today
They said it was an accident but will it go away?
Recycling your rubbish would be a place to start
Don’t have to be a greenie to play your part
Just think about the animals, think about the trees
We’d have a better future in a world with harmony
So, let’s all get together it’s up to me and you
We don’t have to live with these environment blues.
Woke or woken?
I am a middle-class player
So some politicians say
Not in so many words
But in their interesting way
You’ve heard it, haven’t you?
The ravings of some pure, enlightened and woke capital-city greeny
So our deputy ruler said
At least I am not brain dead I thought
Caught between reality and their world
Woke I guess to their untruths
Where disbelief governs
And smothers all others
Including me, and you
Their coven accepts no members without money
Millions give way to billions
We wage earners know our place
And live our lives resigned to a space
That contradicts our daily life
I must be off my face
Such words are madness are they not, woke greenie?
Just a middle-class thinker
Who hankers for a world
Of democracy where we workers run the joint
And share the wealth we create
With love, not hate
It is too late perhaps
But what would I know?
A pure, enlightened and woke capital-city greeny
I wear your insults as a badge of pride
There is nowhere to hide, politicians and the billionaires
We care, they do not
Get rid of the lot
Asset rich and cash poor
Farming’s now a constant war
Stupid rules; I’ve had enough
It’s getting hard and bloody rough.
More rules and forms come everyday
A thousand bastards want their say!
Some greenie wants to save my trees
Another thinks I’m killing bees.
Needs records now for spreading fert
Fence creeks and streams, yes every squirt.
Fluoro signs for all the dangers
Map some nature, for DOC rangers.
Give Queens chain access to the water
Whoops! Electric fence just zapped your daughter
Should I try and stop the sun
Would hate a “guest” to burn his bum.
Need consent now to change your view
SAFE cries foul on baa-ing ewes.
Should I read to stock at night?
Not too scary. Can’t cause them fright.
Drought.
Decision made. Poor stock to sale
Yay! Some do good bastard threatened jail.
Everyone is taking aim
Shall I hang my head in shame?
Got some weeds, must get them gone
So I spray them. I’m still wrong!
On a quad? Well protect your noggin’
I suppose next they'll want a public floggin’
Give me space to do my job
Right, sod off now and shut your gob.
* Department of Conservation
** The equivalent of PETA
Under his nose hung a big greenie.
The kids all thought he was a meanie.
He didn't have a hankie.
That's why he was so cranky.
Also, he had a hollow weenie.
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