Stage One: There was a crime? Oh, please don't offend,
because I'm saying IT NEVER HAPPENED.
Stage Two: Just ignore whatever you read.
IT HAPPENED BUT NOT THE WAY YOU SAID.
Stage Three: Okay, Giuliani, our legal eagle
said IT HAPPENED BUT IT WASN'T ILLEGAL.
(Wait, what? Giuliani's been disbarred?)
Stage Four: Okay, the liberal press did their due diligence
and we have to admit
IT HAPPENED, IT WAS ILLEGAL
BUT THERE'S NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT.
Stage Five: Enough with your fake news bit.
Your reporting's not worth a bucket of spit.
IT HAPPENED, WE'RE PROUD OF IT
AND YOU'RE A TRAITOR FOR QUESTIONING IT!
Categories:
giuliani, humor, political,
Form: Rhyme
When Donald Trump was running for President in 2016,
Fox news was the first to learn about Stormy Daniel's
Relationship with him. Fox news chose to be silent on the
Subject because "We want Trump to win"! You reap
What you sow. By supporting a career criminal through-
Out his administration, Fox ended up with a man who
Was willing to do traitorous acts. Presently, most of
Fox news does not utter the words Trump, Giuliani or
Powell anymore. They now talk about Ron DeSantis
But it's too little, too late. Dominion's actions are what
Fox deserves and are the first example of rats not leaving a
Sinking ship. I've been told that I have all my problems
Behind me. Fox news has a real big problem staring them
Right in the face.
Categories:
giuliani, political,
Form: Free verse
William Barr told Congress a lie
And Mitch Mc Connell knew why
Who cares if they lied?
That's GOP pride!
Giuliani finds a fall guy!
Categories:
giuliani, political,
Form: Limerick
Giuliani let one out in a meeting
Heard on a Microphone as his rude greeting
He said, "That wasn't me"
Oh Rudy, I disagree
It was a loud rumbling that kept repeating
While people around him started retreating
He continued talking, gasses still excreting
At election fraud hearing
The room started clearing
Rudy, what in the heck have you been eating?
Reenacted in parody on SNL
Where it didn't include the stench of his smell
One of Giuliani's gaffes
Gave viewers lots of laughs
Embarrassing, he was caught in show and tell
Categories:
giuliani, humorous,
Form: Limerick
If I was Santa up in the North Pole, many republican stockings would be brimming with coal. President Trump could be gifted a lie detector test, so thousands of rumors could finally rest. I'd arrange for the Italian American Lawyer Association to have Rudy Giuliani apologize to the nation. Mitch McConnell and Mr. Mark Meadows would be sentenced to community service in the ghettos. For Jarred Kushner and Ms. Ivank, I'd gift them a voided check to a Deutch bank.
Categories:
giuliani, 1st grade,
Form: Political Verse
'Twas the night before Christmas and impeachment was in the air
Trump kept tweeting that it was unfair
The truth had come out, but he continued to lie
But Moscow Mitch assured him that victory was nigh
But then Pence started to grin
Hoping for the moment when he would be sworn in
Somehow he knew that the Prez was a crook
Who never did anything by the book
Giuliani the grinch was the Christmas 'hit man'
So Trump gave the order and Christmas was banned
They arrested Santa and read him his rights
So Santa was grounded unable to take flight
Then Trump decided to break away
So he took off on Santa's sleigh
He rode around Washington saying Ho ho ho
Telling everyone No quid pro quo!
12-13-19
Categories:
giuliani, christmas, political,
Form: Rhyme
Mr. Rudy Giuliani
In New York piles high the hot pastrami
Testifying before Washingtonian swamis
He's begging for extra-thin-sliced salami
Categories:
giuliani, food, new york, silly,
Form: Clerihew
Giuliani and Clyde and Bonnie
Trump again had gathered in Giuliani,
And with him is also Clyde and Bonnie;
Some were saying,
Bullets straying,
While trying to steel much more money.
Jim Horn
Categories:
giuliani, allegory, analogy,
Form: Limerick
on merciless concrete
there's a body
don't clean up this blood
shot in the face
and run over as an inssurance
he'll never again put the blue ski mask on
don't clean up this blood
camouflaging a direct shot as ricocheted
did it even came to mind
was he still alive
when those tires
crossed over
don't clean up this blood
he was someone's son
do you have sons
what does the conscience say
does it claim a father
does that father merit someone calls him father
do your sons know
what you just did
don't clean up this blood
who are you behind that shields
who are you behind that badges
who are you behind that spokesman
who's pressing that switch to inhuman
don't clean up this blood
how does it feel when those who you pledged to protect are scared of you
does it make you feel like gods
or obedient dogs
outraged dogs
trying to silent the oppressed
who throws at you those bones from the top of Olympus
don't clean up this blood
just don't
freedom answers to the name of blood
*In memory of Carlo Giuliani (14 March 1978 - 20 July 2001)
Categories:
giuliani, freedom,
Form: Free verse