As I filter through these items stored
Within my mind and heart
Am I to just pretend
You never held a part
Held so loosely in your hand
Without restraint or guile
Made my spirit take to flight
Uplifted by your smile
Why must I hit delete on
Memories held dear
A moot point at best,I simply can't
They always reappear
It is a fact you left a mark
No superficial wound
Cut to the core forever more
Flight feathers permanently pruned
The first cut IS the deepest
All that follows but a scratch
Trying as hard as was possible
I would not take the patch
All in my life incurred since then
I hold no one to task
As I honestly gave all that I could give
Putting on my happiest mask
So........I will always be your Buddy
You will always be my Pal
And if any have a problem
They can also have a cow
Do you change the meaning
in favor of form
Do you add a new comma
because it’s the norm
Do you shorten the sentence
because it’s advised
Do you scour the pages
re-dotting your I’s
Do you read and reread
again to address
What sure of at first
and now want to correct
A wise man once said
and it’s truer today
“The First Cut Is The Deepest”
—leave your words as they lay
(Villanova Pennsylvania: July, 2016)
Do you change the meaning
in favor of form
Do you add a new comma
because it’s the norm
Do you shorten the sentence
because it’s advised
Do you scour the pages
re-dotting your I’s
Do you read and reread
again to address
What sure of at first
and now want to correct
A wise man once said
and it’s truer today
“The First Cut Is The Deepest”
leave your words as they lay
(Villanova Pennsylvania: July, 2016)
I placed his words upon a chopping block
Will this blade be sharp enough for the task?
They say the first cut is the deepest.
I can't cut them up fast enough.
Will this blade be sharp enough for the task?
All these words that have hurt me so.
I can't cut them up fast enough!
Perhaps in smaller pieces they might taste better.
All these words that have hurt me so.
Words make up the recipe of my disaster.
Perhaps in smaller pieces they might taste better.
I chop them up with tremendous enthusiasm!
Words make up the recipe of my disaster
Once separated will they be of little consequence?
I chop them up with tremendous enthusiasm
Uncontrollable tears escape from my eyes
Once separated will they be of little consequence?
They say the first cut is the deepest.
Uncontrollable tears escape from my eyes!
I place his words upon a chopping block.
Written June 18, 2016
For John Lawless's contest.
She couldn't have stomached half of what I had to
Her tears couldn't fill up an ocean
Has his love ever even made her feel this broken?
She doesn't know half this heart ache
This ache causes me not to feel alive
I bet that girl doesn't know what it's like to feel dead inside
He tells me he doesn't love her but I know he does
Sometimes I wish I could have us back to what it was
I'll love him more than she ever will
It's amazing it has been 3 years and I still get that same thrill
She's the lucky one
She's the one
She gives him a feeling I cannot
It gives me a stomach knot
I am distraught
He sees a beauty in her that he doesn't see in me
Sometimes it's her I wish I could be
It gives me an anxious feeling
my heart skips beats
my heart drops
my heart stops
She doesn't know the abuse he's done to my mind
It is him in every guy I try to find
First love is the sweetest
First cut is the deepest
The song didn't lie
It's time to stop asking myself why
It's time for it to burn, it's time for it to die
The First Cut Is The Deepest
I have a razor blade in my hand
There is no world outside this man
An act of selfishness was my plan
I cried for me one last time
I guess I once loved this friend of mine.
The razor cuts deep beneath my skin
I do not feel it my brain is occupied with other things
The blood trickled as my conscousness weakened
All I saw was darkness and unreason.
Now in a deathly sleep
All around me quiet keep
Love cuts deep.
You never know what the future holds.
With love we try to hold on even though it comes and it goes.
In the present it feels like forever.
swallowing all doubts as we fear the pain,
we often hold on to love in vain,
hiding all the shame.
I'm tired of all these games.
Whats love if it's not forever,
temporary pleasure,
my hearts been through so much you could never measure.
They say the first cut is the deepest,
after your first your feel like your heart as been cursed,
you then put whats left in a hurse.
Fighting love when it knocks your door,
fully armed and equipped as you prepare for war.
Earning stripes, metals, and rewards.
You then ask yourself what is this going towards,
I'm drowning in all blood that pours.
Lonley nights, and countless fights.
I'm now being broken down by a straight shooter,
weapons so deadly, aimed and kept shooting steady.
I'm ready.
Ready to die for love, God watch over above.
Soul Ink.
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