Robert Sherriff - Australian - Poet -Author - Singer - Actor - American Historian – Photographer- Dedicated TO Jarryd Health Peter Les Sherriff
Golf Humor Story
As I sauntered along the lush, green golf course fairways, the player ahead slowed to meet me. With a grin, I inquired, "How's your game shaping up today?"
Turning back, he met my gaze with a hint of exhaustion and replied, "A piece of advice - never spar with your spouse before hitting the greens." He smiled wryly, "Especially if she's a better golfer than you! I'm still trying to recover from the 'hole' situation."
He chuckled softly, "Believe me, my game is not reflecting its true potential out there."
Feel free to share this humorous tale with your golfing friends or on social platforms! It's a story that all golfers, from beginners to pros, can relate to. Sometimes, a touch of fun is all it takes to navigate those challenging rounds with a smile.
Categories:
fairways, girlfriend, golf, humorous, marriage,
Form: Free verse
Pristine, precisely clipped greens
Rolling fairways flanked by majestic trees
Water hazards imperil a golfer’s well-being
~ While in Saudi, sand traps greet the King
Categories:
fairways, earth, golf, water,
Form: Couplet
May your drives be long and true
Missed fairways, but a few
And when in a rough,
Be it not tall enough
To affect your follow through
May your approach shots miss every tree
Be straight and shank free
Your club selection right
To land it pin high
With a line easy to read
May the greens be not to slow or fast
Always dry, clean and flat
Do that thing you do
With putts no more than two
And no need for a lag
So it’s time to celebrate another year
Be it Feliz Navidad or New Years cheer
Have a good time
Golf buddy o’ mine
And play a round with these dimpled spheres
Categories:
fairways, christmas, giving, golf,
Form: Limerick
I dreamt of playing golf in Covid times
I cannot play actually as virus confines
Bereft of clubs we threw our balls
Ignoring fairways they hit tree walls
Lost balls make for stiff golfing crimes.
22.9.2020
Categories:
fairways, golf,
Form: Limerick
Sticks bewitched by fairies’ play;
They often lead my ball astray;
The woods much easier for to find;
Than grand fairways of greenery fine;
Of this there can be no doubt;
Golf balls are related to trout;
For every time I play a round,
Into the water my ball is bound.
Maybe it’s bass or perch they seek;
Either way they find the drink;
Sand on a beach, now that is fine;
But in a fairway, is a crime;
It cannot be my skills are amiss;
For many other’s hit shots like this;
I think I know who to blame;
The Scot’s invented this blessed game.
Categories:
fairways, endurance, fish, fun, golf,
Form: Rhyme
Ambiguous beds,
my drowsy youth,
like warm, Bermuda fairways
and greens.
My back on this bed,
thoughts roam,
hands gesture and write
words in the air —
A window to watch
clouds in the day,
moonlight on the grass,
stars on clear night.
Particles of sun
on moonlit nights,
synesthesia colours
each sentence.
I bite my nails.
Helps caress,
soothe my psychosis,
paranoid of whether I can replace myself again.
This poison
invades my speech and thought —
I push it away
with poetry.
After repair, we'll tear down these curtains
of oblivion, clean the bedskirt,
change our address,
move this cedar book case
to an attic of a different Victorian house.
This book goes with me,
to a freshly mowed lawn,
to read on my back,
in the moonlight,
in fragrance of grass.
***
© 2017 February 20 | Darren | Wesley
Categories:
fairways, anxiety, books, mental illness,
Form: Free verse
Golf Balls Did End Up Under
I just looked outside and saw so much rain
And hope that it all will go down the drain
Until one day again it finally did level off
We could play another great game of golf.
Fairways together each green should link
But when you walk on water and start to sink
Much difficulty surely soon started to see
What would your adjusted handicap be?
Through all of the rule books I have sifted
Nothing was said about being air-lifted
Fairways forgotten and had been skipped
While all of the water flowed and dripped.
To me complete conclusion it now brings
When you may need pair of water wings
Do be prepared in case of a big blunder
When below golf bag and balls go under.
When your balls are below water that
sounds pretty high filuting to me.
James Thomas Horn
Retired Veteran and Poet
Categories:
fairways, encouraging, humorous,
Form: Couplet
Golf is not a good walk spoiled
As some folks would suggest!
It’s a game where you can find,
Nature as your guest.
The Woodpecker in its finery,
Peck, peck, pecking away.
The Red Kites flying overhead,
Wow! That sure makes one’s day.
We saw the owl in the trees,
Just after morning light!
What a wonderful experience,
An exhilarating sight.
The Roe deer on the fairways;
The Foxes sloping by:
Swallows, Jays and Robins,
These all make one sigh!
The golf adds to the pleasure
Creating a healthy atmosphere:
There’s so much enjoyment on our course
Every day throughout the year.
Categories:
fairways, nature, sports,
Form: Verse
Returning to fields rimmed by golden stones
Just there I hear the movements that arise
From August tides lapping; I'm not alone
While rosy daylight cuddles my warm sighs
My hometown blooms again with fine décor
Wildflowers peeping through the lush fairways
As blue-eyed jays trip slowly on the shore
Towards the sand dunes, waking all my days.
Categories:
fairways, appreciation, home,
Form: Quatrain
Think of me as the eyes of late nightfall
crawl through a wafting sill
where lone moon cuddles dimmed glow
before she quietly slowly lays
herself on a cradle of clouds
as whistle of barn owl and incantations groans.
When dusk explodes into ash
upon fairways that lap,
think of me
mysteriously walking on the ledge
of our winding grassland
picking bluebells in wanderlust.
And when candles snuff the lampshades
think of me,
like the velvet skin of dusk fall
circling in a world of marbled thoughts
until you etch the back of my spine
to lullaby the sourness of truant dreams.
The stars play game-spy with the wind
rowing into a wave of dewy cruise;
I enter into your own lenses, a search light
that becomes the harbour of some peace
while echoes of unknown voices speak...
It is at this juncture when you, perhaps,
might think of me
lending a gentle taste of assurance
that the next hours will stir a brightened sun.
,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,
contest 259 Brian Strand
Categories:
fairways, devotion, Lullaby, night,
Form: Free verse
Beneath the golden sunset two lovers watch the skies.
Embraces race straight to the heart where true love lay.
Arise, oh, soul and sing; great joy brings this surprise.
“Charming,” held me on the beach; my prince passed life's way.
Hopefulness bequeathed sweet tears to delighted dreamy eyes.
Beneath the night-lights in the sky, a million twinkles sparked.
Loneliness was chased away; sorrows succumbed to daze.
Alluring dreams and tenderness anticipated; trust embarked.
Neolithic passion paved the way into my heart, oh, happy days.
Kisses and caresses tattooed two souls with love's eternal mark.
Everlastingly life, now shared, grows, friendship still ablaze.
Together, walking winding roads through hardships and fairways.
Before the sunrise burst the dream, blankets blew in sand.
Interspersed reality saw tomorrow amid floating clouds.
Nonetheless, a princess dreamed; her prince led her by the hand.
Great, now, is the memory of an envisioned certainty.
Optimisms saved the day when “Happily-ever-after” came my way.
© July 4, 2011
Dane Ann Smith-Johnsen
Written for: "BEACH BLANKET BINGO"
Sponsored by: Linda-Marie The Sweetheart of P.S.
Categories:
fairways, imagination, love, nature, nostalgia,
Form: Acrostic
There was a day when I couldn't speak..
A day when I was small and meek..
I cried to ears that couldn't hear..
Only got consumed by many fears..
My screams were muffled and silent..
My hands couldn't write straight, only bent..
Words that came out had no direct feeling..
I stood on a stage where only seats had a meaning..
Then my voice was finally heard over the noise..
Now I sing in lines that are played with like small toys..
Piano keys and a paint brush are my screams..
But only poetry and love can fulfill my dreams..
Fairways and skylines are my picture..
Just a man who wanted to be heard and not just a fixture..
Categories:
fairways, introspectionday,
Form: Sonnet
I lay under the rays of warmth and joy..
My eyes enlighten by the shadow just like a toy..
The glow from east to west follows my day..
On the big tractor I sit with my music and rays..
I pray it stays out as my body longs for sleep..
It hides away for the night while the passing of sheep..
Morning comes as light spills through my open window..
Up and dressed for a new day under a bright new show..
Coffee poured and sunglasses perched high..
Golf clubs in the corner,called out sick to tee up and drive..
The fairways bright and green as the sun covers my playground..
My phone is ringing so loud, could be work but I can't here a sound..
Categories:
fairways, happiness
Form: Rhyme