Depressing. Poems

Depressing Songs

I love depressing songs. 
Like the song about-
Spots in my eyes.
They are weird, but who cares?
It doesn’t hurt. 
As long as I don’t cry.
Depressing songs. 
Living in Michigan with lakes, and beaches. 
Nothing. 
No such things as dancing. 
Skirts twirling. 
And hands and feet moving. 
I love depressing songs. 
In my car. 
Turning on my

What the Silence Carried

I have loved like windows love the morning-
quietly, without asking to be noticed,
just hoping someone would open them.

There were nights
when the moon knew more about me
than anyone ever would-
how I curled inward,
folding grief into origami birds,
sending them across invisible winds
toward the edge of forgetting.

I have lost things I never held-
names, chances, whole lives
that might've been

The end of my rope

You tied the noose that I hang from
I stare at the writing on the wall
I feel like all the words are written wrong
My feet can’t find the stall
I wish my thoughts would just be gone

I am the rope in which they tie
I can’t seem to shape the future of my life
Got me thinking am I

Dreaming Eyes

We never know of mistakes -
Or the lie that we are living.
We lose our sense of awareness,
Tell ourselves we are believing.

But those weights grow heavy -
As we ignorantly trudge through skies.
Uplifted ‘til we realize,
Then we fall to our demise.

- And this feeling, it isn’t freeing,
For we bound ourselves to lies.
We never know we’re dreaming -
Until

The World is Like the Moon

A repaired planet looks like the moon.
Where humans would die
Where war would lose

With a deep black sky
And a hindering light
The lids of your eyes
And the sun, unviewably bright.

I’m sad like a crater.
I made a crater on the moon.
I’m bad because I made a crater.
Forever, it shall loom.

Even in a healed Earth, even on the moon.
The

Crazy Eyes

It's been four years since I submitted my last poem, I was only one year into my addiction to methamphetamine. I'm currently five years in and boy oh boy do I have some perspective to give
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You see the crazy eyed girl in the corner of the room, eyes completely vacant when they used to shine

deep winter

i don't think i deserve a second chance
you could pull away at my string
unravel me, make me dance
and that would be too much for this stasis of mine
frozen in different snowflakes of time
each bearing memories, asking for tithes
demanding fealty, a bended knee
lest they warrant me another execution
so ill sit, fester, let the salt enter
whilst i

UNWRITTEN REBEL

In realms of ink and paper, I once roamed,
A character lost, in stories I'd been loaned.
But as I tread the paths, both dark and grand,
I feel the sting of fate, a crueler hand.

Every laugh, every tear, scripted with care,
Yet beneath the surface, I'm painfully aware.
No choice is mine, no destiny my own,
I'm but a puppet,

UNCLAIMED ECHOES

In the echoes of your whispers, I heard the words you spoke, "I wish to be the last," a promise gently broke. She, the canvas of your dreams, painted in hues divine, A masterpiece of beauty that, alas, will never be mine.

I'm selfish, I confess, I can't let you slip away,
Yet her name dances in

Suffer

Sometimes
I look at others
And wonder
How they can thrive
While I suffer

Night in a city of artificial light

Breathing in the luminous vapor that tastes like vanilla
While looking at illuminating our neon skyline
Since the moon and stars are veiled with the aluminium ceilings
Pastel rain that tastes of iron drips down from the blank sky

Seeing people as mannequins with implanted violet eyes
The brand-new craze in this blind and crazy world I would guess
With those

Shots Fired

"Pop! Pop! Pop!" goes a squeezed Desert Eagle.
  Two innocent bodies drop; funeral to be held for one.
Fleeing block party crew scatter like startled lemmings.
   A drive-by shooting; blood curdling screams follow. 
    Repeated cries of "Somebody call an ambulance!"... 
        

Getting Bad Again

We have all noticed that things are getting bad again,
I know things will get better, but I don't know when.

While clutching at my arm
As my blood transfused
I first pressed the alarm
Struggling to find the door 
while I felt confused
I never intended to give Abby a fright,
And only on my second night.

While the ants crawl in

My War

My War 

Tick tick tick
My brain is always on
My thoughts never quick
Sometimes I wonder if I'm my own pawn 
In a game that my very own brain has drawn

My brain has turned on my heart
That I know without a doubt
Every day it has thrown a killing dart
Blood has begun to leak out 
I can feel

Left To Fry

I was left to fry,
Left to try,
And left to die alone.

All in a hope,
That I was unimportant and unsuspecting.
Yet I can see through the black cloak of blame and lies.
I will not be left to fry.

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