Getting Bad Again

We have all noticed that things are getting bad again, I know things will get better, but I don't know when. While clutching at my arm As my blood transfused I first pressed the alarm Struggling to find the door while I felt confused I never intended to give Abby a fright, And only on my second night. While the ants crawl in and out of my minds maze, I decide to wander through the night and stargaze. I felt a calmness and peace until I went to leave, Little did I know that my own ears would deceive. Jack is who I heard, he came from behind, As those awful memories reoccurred, With the infestation combined, I had to physically shake them away. But simply shaking wasn't enough, These thoughts and feelings were big and tough. Needed to bang them all out of my head, If there was any hope of returning to my dreaded bed. On the icy concrete for a while I lay, Right before red met with gray. I don't hesitate, until reality withdraws, Just continued to pound my head But then I pause… My mind is extremely loud, As I become isothermal, I feel so stupid and far from proud, Realizing the gravel is now intradermal. Staggering to my door, Trying to contain my insanity, I chuck my things down to the floor, To return to a different reality, All I can say is I am sorry it went wrong and I am sorry Yvonne. I didn't mean to shock you or make you upset, I never want anyone to think I am going to hurt them or am a threat. I hope you understand that things will be better once I settle, And chances are, things will be even better once I descale my old kettle.