Best Troubleshoot Poems

His wings are most surely singed,
from fires of his many sins.
Yet, they wrap me in a gentleness,
That alludes to his protective prowess.

Beneath his nails, hard workin' dirt,
for angelic robes, a flannel shirt.
Denim jeans and scuffed work boots,
an inherent need to troubleshoot.

His baseball cap is worn...

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How could I survive without a computer, only heaven knows!
'Tis a necessary tool for my poetical verse to compose.
Today, the beast went down again, wouldn't you know it,
Just as I received a brilliant revelation so vital to a poet!

My technical aptitude is meager but I...

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This bewildering computer of mine just gives me fits!
I panic when the consarned thing goes on the fritz!
I peruse the baffling manual but that doesn't help me any.
It might as well have been written in Hindustani!

There is no one more computer illiterate than I,
So I...

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Looking mighty cute
Dressed in a suit
He was on route
To pick up a loot
Ever so resolute

Arrived at the institute
He thought he heard them call him a cloot
Or maybe it was a galoot
He really wasn’t absolute
These days his hearing is acute

They said he had to wait over...

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Unaffordable, yet valiant speeding, 
tailgating, and zooming Pep Boys, I cannot dodge. 

Yours truly grief stricken
(sob... sob... sob)...
wheely hard to bear
this anticipatory anxiety
riddled joker impossible
mission thwarting despair

death knell tolled (told),
woebegone news, I did fear
hears stunned me into silence,
the unwelcome prognosis,
I needed to hear
no joke, but...

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(alternately titled no particular reason:
bring unto “fake” trumpeting Caesar
seven salad dressings from deep freezer
and lettuce deign at your plea azure.)

Graced with boyish good looks,
innocence and naiveté to boot,
an especial loathing toward me
chicken legs re: spindleshanks

(which serve as laughingstock
of dis hair reed ole coot)
oft times clad...

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Steer free and clear by a bajillion miles... 
the warning words website not secure
nearly left writer of these words piss poor.

usually linkedin with *********** websites
lest ye find yourself in the maws of hackers.

generalization utilized to communicate actual
online experience that occurred Wednesday
(August 24th, 2022), while i...

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can’t seem to shut it down
no strength to stay away
when I try hard to back down
fear of missing out holds sway

FOMO, FOMO, FOMO
keeps driving me insane
try to minimize its hold by
playing silly name games—
FOMO FOMO bo-bomo 
Bonana-fanna fo-omo 
Fe fi mo-momo 
FOMO

started as a simple...

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I've plugged it in
And turned it on 
Checked the cable 
Won't take long 

Allowed access 
Downloaded files 
Installed drivers 
Wait quite a while 

Clicked the links
Agreed to terms 
Ticked the boxes
Start to squirm 

Updated versions 
Tried other ports 
Looked at Google
Had grumpy thoughts 

Changed the...

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Inextricably rooted with hair fixation

As a lad in grade school,
yours truly, (a diminutive, intuitive,
oversensitive, and vegetative potato head kid,
whose voice exhibited
a severe nasal twang)
felt envious at other boys,
especially those young bucks
who sported budding antlers
plus thick thatch of hair.

Even now as a grown man
of three score...

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Verizon router won't connect to internet blues
(alternately titled: ma bell heave hubble
telecommunications gone south).

Best sung courtesy rotten dull liver:red worst
after words which, I gotta quench mine thirst
whereby think Botox lips zipped and pursed
hence impossible linkedin mission Mary Jane
and Buster Brown kisser darn it result socked
hermetically...

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Ah... methinks I could sleep forever

Basking in a supine position
with eyes wide shut
while the space heater churns out
fast moving molecules of heat
solitudinarian drowsy thinker fêted
by miniature fantasy 
of tropical island paradise
accompanying and populating slumber
courtesy flickering, mesmerizing,
undulating barenaked native nymphs

tricked out as miniscule floaters
drifting across field...

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(alternately titled: ma bell heave hubble
vehicular repairs (prohibitive) 
finds me bleary eyed stupefied 
and countenance grizzled with prickly stubble 
collapsed amidst virtual rubble).

Best sung courtesy rotten dull liver:red worst
after words which, I gotta quench mine thirst
whereby think Botox lips zipped and pursed
hence impossible linkedin mission...

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Technological glitch with EBT (i.e.) food card...
at LIDL checkout line

At 4:03 PM on November first
two thousand and twenty,
the missus nsync with yours truly,
(an inimitable average Joe - cur -
biden his time at Royersford, Pennsylvania

LIDL food market)
unexpectedly witnessed cashier
manning checkout aisle number two
to experience technological glitch,
which...

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Rather than contact tech savvy Macbook Pro technician

Computer technology a dog send
boot also a source of woe,
cuz prohibitive costs charged by technicians
to troubleshoot Macbook Pro
just recently sought out
self teaching methodology
perhaps oddly enough
even tapping into pantomime lessons
(mastering "art of silence"
such as the estimable Marcel Marceau)

found yours truly...

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