Best Toff Poems

you stand tall and raise your shoulders high,
you walk amongst my superiors,
its true- i work for you,
you claim to be my superior but im more...

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A party of toffs all so snotty

was crashed by a yokel so naughty.

After passing much gas,

this guy with no class

took a dump left unflushed in...

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Look, I found a new book to read,
This is a book of nonsense, indeed,
Titled, "The Amicable Divorce,"
I did snicker and chortle, of course,
Who wrote this?...

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The maiden was carrying a basket
it was full of sweet flowers for market
once she got there she places a blanket
then lays the bunches around a...

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My rhyme is better than yours..
 I’ll say that without a pause.... 
and I know I've got just cause
 cos your poems are written for...

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"Headline news! The rag trade is torn to pieces!
Dolls are strewn across the streets with skirts lifted high.
Headline news! Markets are buzzing with voracious bees;
Stinging...

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Sovrinty’s a grand ole gent,
But sovrinty don’t pay the rent.
I got six kids’ moufs to feed.
Sqeezin’ stones don’t make ‘em bleed.
Theresa gal sure went and...

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"50 Words for Poe: Foxglove"



What goes through the mind 
of Winter, when you are Autumn
just past Spring
Sometimes you’d squeeze IT
in the hot spaces left-of-centre
with the...

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Perhaps I'll find him
in realities cloak
steadfast with fiery dim
frozen woodland oak
capture my heart 
lead with your hand
stricken not to apart
laying in the sand
dusting me off
from...

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Mentally  endowed enough,
to take the piffle from your puff,
and ram it home, sweet butter cup,
side effects are frightening,

miscarriage of justice, can put you off
and...

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Halloween is here!
But have no fear! 
This is my guide so you survive. 

Beware the graveyards full of ghosts and ghouls. 
The graveyard is where...

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They are people just so full
thinking they are the top
nobody's like them at all
forgetting that one day they'll drop

These people think nothing of the poor
give...

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Sebastian dressed like a toff
Other people he would scoff
He was a snob, I suppose
People named him
Toffee nose...

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Of childhood, a little story,
Mimi, fluffy dog, toy glory,
She lost an eye, tail wagged off,
Rubbed fur, not so toff,
But so well loved, I say,
Wish I...

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Neglected was Leon Kossoff
expressionistic & never a toff
Known for his pool series
&so at ease...

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