Best Slammer Poems
sorry that its taken a while
making you wait is not my style
even though im the top of the pile
everyone praises your slams it makes me sick
PD you can suck on my wit
they fear you for no reason
cut the head off the queen, thats treason
lets play barbies. i'll be ken
you should leave this poetry lark to the men
i'm hot i'm a wheel
i'll rob and i'll steal
anything you say bounces off my skin
the only outcome is a danny win
i just don't think you stand a chance in hell
you just cant slam that well
you try and rhyme on this line
but the next you dont at all
that may suit an amateur just fine
but thats were fake slammers fall
down down to the ground
i'll slap your ass around and round
your old and frail
i slam so hard i make you fail
better collect your pension
whilst i alleviate the tension
oh im sorry you probably dont comprehend
with incredible grammar this slam i'll end
you might as well give up trying to comeback
my hot wheels own the track
even though i wont get as many views
i know i win, so F you
if you can beat this slam i'll be surprised
so cross your t's and dot your i's
you get silver i win gold
i've got my youth and you're mighty old.
(I just took this as a fun little assignment.
I did not even make the deadline for the
contest. I was not targeting any person
at all in this little story. I do not object to
slam poetry and I think it would be
humorous to see someone get arrested
for not even being able to slam correctly!
I love all my friends, slamming and
non-slamming alike. ) Andrea
Some poetry cops learned the crime
Of a slammer who just couldn’t rhyme.
In a jail cell he pays -
Being forced endless days
To hear sonnets while he’s serving time!
Jazzing around,
the black humming bee
swings along with the strings
Fiddles, guitars
in the piano bars
keeping a-slamming the floor
The music is growing
from under the feet
of the Dancer:
THE BEAT!
Mother asked her big brother to pass the sugar;
big brother ruined it by splashing on liquor;
father rued spilt liquor by throwing his jigger
that hit sister who lit an elbow hard slammer
straight into the hand of their rare guest and butcher;
butcher stood to secure a full-face slap on her;
slap missed, striking their napping, fat cat to a blurred
flying fur on shriek tour that dog crashed with claws bore;
clawed dog wailed and bailed, dragging tail out wee dog
door where he ran to distance pain until a looper
stopped his scooter – close by was one giant cougar;
too pooped to care, tired dog flopped right then and
right there; dog closed eyes, cougar cleared throat, then
croaked, ‘Hey, Lassie, are you insanely blind to cougar
claw lugers?’; dog moaned, ‘A quick cougar corker beats
home murder.’
I beleive pam? has run out of beach.' Lost the thread.. Is full of over reach.' She tried some gutter humor.' And now is almost pleading the fifth.' The sight is truly horrendus this gal is sucking on the very
Pith.' Its down to the bone..There is no more room, i can see a cell door in my sight it looms.) It'll slam;
With a bang! at a short
Length..Of time? or even more soon '
I wouldent cover; your dime '