Best Really Weird Poems

"Do you like U2?" she asked. 

It was an unusually awesome sunrise in Belleville Park. I come here to eat my breakfast on nice days and to take in the scenery before heading to the office. Paris has been good to me. I grew up...

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Oh boy, she was gorgeous and I made mention of bed
She said she really liked me but she won’t until we’re wed
She often said there’s stuff that really ought to be discussed
But I could only think of getting hitched to quench my lust

We did it,...

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I once tried to burn Day Light
But found she was not flammable
So I decided to try Twi Light
Not a chance...Twi just laughed at me
and Day smirked, snickered and pointed
Which REALLY burned me up...

'Try burning Night Time,’ Twi suggested
(No way! Burn me once? Flame on you
Burn...

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Written in summer of 1976.


I used to eat my lunch with groups
of businessmen from Campbell Soups.

We drank a drink at lunch each day
Of Coca-Cola mixed with hay

And talked of pending corporate plans
And willow-haired orangutans.

I spent a lot of time this way
At doing things that were...

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A really weird tradition’s
Known as Christmas in July.
There was Santa ho-ho-hoing,
Leaving me to wonder – why?

It was boiling hot and sunny
On the boardwalk by the beach
So the Yuletide decorations
Seemed a trifle out of reach.

Folks with bathing suits paraded
Past some carolers and “snow.”
Many seemed to catch...

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One last song for the wicked
One last song and a cigarette
I see you standing in the back
Forming a silhouette

One last song for the really weird
One last song and a big cigar
I see you dancing by yourself
Wondering who you are

One last song for the wild at...

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Words are slowly entered into computer word processors
Words are slowly photocopied into ebooks as are magazines, newspapers
Disappearing into text messages, faxes, emails _
Soon every one will have to use an electronic device to reach words...

What if?___Satellites start to fall from the sky...
What if?___The satellites images...

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You can't be serious!!!
This must be a joke
To consider this yahoo
This really weird bloke

It's all a big put on
I have to ass/u/me
You guys are surely outta
Your cotton pickin' tree

It's a real big gimmick
To generate interest
No one can convince me
It's good for business

It's just meant to...

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Apartment dwelling strangers
who never stop to talk,
don’t know the people living
a few doors down the block.

They nod hello while driving by
but never know my name,
somehow I get the feeling
it’s all a terrible shame.

Our insular existence
strikes me as really weird,
as if the nearby neighbor
is someone to...

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Painful Angles; Hope gets strangled
New fangled fears forever dangled
Entangled dreams are mostly mangled
Demons wrestled then wearily wrangled

StrAngels chAngeled,
My sweet CocAinegeles!
Those cunning exchAngeles
Outlawed derAngeles...

Oh, ye kind Angels, give me Peace-
From your embrace, never released
Envelope me, and do not cease
Wrap me in your Golden Fleece!

Let me taste...

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Trump Was A Stye In My Eye

Trump was a really weird type of guy;
He has become a big stye in my eye;
Sarah Huckabee,
You have to see;
They should disappear high in the sky.

Jim Horn...

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When I was yet in grade school, my teacher gave to me,
a task I thought most surely would be the death of me.
She ordered me to write a verse, in any style I chose,
I will tell you right up front that at her words I...

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I think I’ll have a little tipple or two
I drink for me and a drink for you
We can start out carefully sipping slow
The night is young there’s a long time to go

After a few drinks things look different to us
We start to chat more coz...

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I get spanked just about every day? I don't know why? I guess it is just natural for guys! I never see girls do it! Guys are really weird you have to admit it. There are many different types of spankings out there. There are...

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Trump A Fruit Cake

Come on now and give me big break;
Trump has become a crazy fruit cake;
Around will crawl,
With hands small;
Favorite news he reads has been fake.

Jim Horn

Trump An Idiot

At times we think Trump is a total idiot;
He should only wear shoes which will fit;
As...

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